The 20th century was a time of great change for women and our role in society. No person in their right mind would argue that the advancements made weren't real progress for women's rights. From the 1900s onwards the number of women in the workplace rose significantly, especially during the two world wars where women entered into industry in numbers higher than had ever been seen before. And women were earning money and gaining a voice and independence because of this.
A decade and a half into the 21st century, we're still striving to break that glass ceiling. To have more women in the boardroom. To have equality for the sexes. But at what cost?
Now before you shoot me down in your droves and accuse me of being anti-feminist, please hear me out. I'm not for one minute suggesting that we return to the days of the 1950s house wife, where women's choices were limited and a women's place was still largely considered to be the home. I certainly would not advocate that opinion. I'm just wondering whether in some ways we might have done ourselves a disservice.
I've been giving life balance and what I would like from my life, particularly in terms of a career, a lot of thought recently, and it's become apparent that being a mother who also wants a career is wrought with conflicting emotions. And I'm not the only one to feel this way. I have read many a blog on this topic, and when I wrote about this myself, I received lots of comments from mothers saying "me too." So although I recognise there are the lucky few who have achieved the perfect life balance, there are also a great number of women who have not. So many women agonise over how to achieve the perfect life balance. Striving to have the perfect home, the perfect family life, to be the perfect mother and to have the dream job.
It's when I think about the number of women pushing themselves to achieve perfection, agonising over the guilt associated with the choices they make. Are they working long hours and worrying about neglecting their family? Are they staying at home feeling as though they should be contributing to the workforce? It's when I think about these things that I question, would life be easier if there were fewer choices? Was life simpler when a women's role in society was defined as being a homemaker and mother, and not as wonder women able to have it all?
You see, if I had a pound for every time I've heard women say how hard it is to juggle running a house, raising children and going out to work, I'd be a wealthy women. In fact these issues would be irrelevant to me because I would be able to pay to have it all. I digress, but the point I'm trying to make is that in having so many more choices, we seem to have increased the burden of our workload. Instead of being able to choose between one thing or another, we now feel as though we need to do and have it all. Perhaps things were easier when all we needed to do was to stay at home and raise our children.
But, having things easier doesn't necessarily mean better does it? Otherwise why would we have fought so hard for our rights in the first place? Why would the suffragettes chain themselves to the railings of government buildings in their quest to win women the right to vote? Why would an inspirational group of women in a Dagenham factory walk out of work in protest to unfair pay? Why would a courageous young Pakistani girl, Malala Yousafai, risk her life and take a bullet to the head, whilst promoting the rights for girls to have a good education? They and we fight for these rights because they are worth it.
We now have the choice to work, or not to work. Husbands can choose to be a stay at home dad. Many of us now work from home. We work part-time, full-time, freelance. We have one parent families, two parent families, families with two Dads, or two Mums. We now have far greater freedom to decide how we want our lives to be. We are the makers of our future, we have the power to decide what we want to do. Now if we could just stop piling the pressure on ourselves and be kinder to ourselves in acknowledging our successes, then perhaps we could enjoy the freedom our predecessors fought so hard for.
In fact, I think we owe it to them, don't you?