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Kim Goldman Headshot

Bringing Beige Back

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Is life as good as everyone makes it sound on Facebook and Twitter? Everyone I read about or follow has the greatest husband ever, the most amazing in-laws, the best-est boyfriend, the sweetest kids in the world, the awesomest job and the hottest sex life.

Really? Am I the only that one that has some mediocre's, a handful of so-so's and a few decent's thrown into the mix?

Whenever I see updates about how fabulous everything always is, I find myself questioning the legitimacy: Is it really possible to be that happy all the time? Do those people ever have a bad day? Maybe they are believers in "The Secret" -- put good energy out, get good energy back? And don't even get me started on all those memes with the puppies and kittens!

I consider myself a happy person, but honestly, I don't exactly know what that means. Is being happy a state of mind or an actual feeling we have? Is happiness the same as being content? If you're content, does that imply you've settled? If you keep wanting to expand the walls of your comfort zone, does that signify unrest? Does it mean we are unfilled, if we are always seeking more? Ahhhh, the meaning of happiness is so stressful!

I am early into my 40's and experiencing a sense of calm that I haven't felt in a long while. But ironically, that same calm is making me antsy. I resist the notion of settling, and keep setting my sights on bigger and better, but I often wonder if I will ever be just OK with where I am and be content with what I have stashed away in my heart and mind.

I read so many articles about the "steps to happiness" -- mostly, they include health, wealth, education, relationships and spirituality, but if one of those is out of whack, then what? Does the whole system fall apart? I work hard on striking a balance between each of these, but if I am honest with myself, they could all use a little "make-over." Fortunately for me, knowing that, doesn't leave me feeling unhappy as much as it motivates me to keep on truckin'.

So many people I come across talk about their life as being "beige" -- (a term I use to represent ' blah.' It resonated with most, so I am going with it.) They speak of boredom, complacency and a desire to be more than they are. But as they speak their truths, they also acknowledge feeling fortunate for their family, friends, career and personal possessions .. but it is still beige in their eyes. "I just think I am destined for more than this," -- as if the 'this' is bad. Are we bred to think everything has to be unicorns and rainbows? Can beige be the next splash of red?

What is your measure for happiness?