Why No One Should Buy Presents This Year
Last week, Black Friday heralded the unofficial kickoff of the 2008 winter holiday shopping frenzy. Despite the economic chill in the air and the Ghost of Christmas Future in our peripheral vision, determined consumers gathered to snag special deals from anxious retailers who opened stores as early as 12:01 a.m. for these stoic souls. While it appears that sales have gotten off to a robust start, analysts warn holiday buying enthusiasm may fade once doorbuster deals peter out. Hallelujah!
Call me Scrooge if you want, but I think that no one should buy holiday presents this year. Materialism has been on a rampage for too long in this country- it deserves a time-out and we deserve an extended vacation from it. There's something really wrong with how the holiday season has been transformed from communal celebration into gift competition. Is there anything more valuable in life than our time and what we choose to do with it? The last thing I feel like using mine up on is running around searching for presents that are supposed to prove my love.
This year my goal is to be present instead of giving presents. My focus for the holiday season is to have fun and connect with loved ones instead of worrying about what to buy everyone. There isn't a single material thing I've ever received that could compare to time well-spent with friends. Though I've been nurturing this philosophy for years it's a particularly gratifying belief right now because it's become so socially acceptable. As the economic downturn affects us all there has been a perceptible shift in American sentiment towards acquisition. This year it's finally cool to give from the heart instead of the wallet, and I say hooray!
A shining example of promoting a return to tradition was Oprah's "Favorite Things" episode-- her focus was on bringing real meaning back to the holidays. While some people grumbled that the thriftiness of the show was depressing, I found it refreshing that she challenged people to actually think about meaning and authenticity. And check out a website called www.NoChristmasGiftsThisYear.com- it helps you create fun, customizable e- cards to send to friends and relatives that offer them the gift of time instead of money.
This year Americans are planning to spend an average of $431 on gifts for the holiday season. This is down almost 50% from 2007, an indicator of just how tight times are getting. So why not declare a no-gift Christmas/ Chanukah/ Kwanzaa, etc. and save your money for a better use than presents which decorate the basement? The act of emphasizing creativity, thoughtfulness and generosity of spirit this holiday season is a win/win situation: it yields both great personal dividends and helps keep your bank account positive.
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I went to that www.nochri
For such a message as the site espouses, I think I'd rather do it by phone than e-mail.
We've scaled down our Christmas for several years now. We buy small gifts that we know the other person either needs, or will enjoy. No big-ticket items. We go to church on Christmas eve (which the site doesn't mention, just addressing the cultural holiday) and then have dinner the next day. It's all about relaxing, and enjoying family.
Interesting, but many folks like my family won't be buying presents because we just don't have the money.
I have never been like the average person for this holiday. I was a single mother to one son and
xmas nearly drained me every year. Had to play Santa and I secretly resented it. I always felt so out of place because it was so hard to pull a nice xmas out of my white irish #$% year after year. I would comfort myself by imagining that Christ probably would feel out of place here too.
Recently saw that WalMart commercial where all the cashiers are flicking their lights along with Xmas music. I just stared mindlessly at it and then I realized we have finally meshed the birth of Christ completely with commercialism. Merry merry merry merry Christmas.
While I can understand the sentiment of the writer, reality is a bit different. For too many their gift giving is far too often out of guilt or obligation rather than a expressing genuine feeling for that person. For many, they will have to say no to any or most of their past gift giving due to job loss, declines in income, and demands for other needs. This is the year to perform that triage you always wanted to do to cut down on all the gift giving, who you give gifts to, how much you spend for each person or in total. Better to take those $100's you might spend and not put it on a charge card compounding your interest due or money you need for your self or family for real needs like to pay bills.
Yeah lets screw up the economy even more by not pumping money into. Great idea. Get off your soap box and get real. We need strong retail sales or things are going to get a lot worse come the first of the year.
I am torn... i see both sides and agree with many points but the reason we are in this mess is because people spend money they don't have. Our economy needs grounding based on something other than consumerism! We are at such an extreme level of materialism in this country, it scares me. I know 20-something's who make barely 50k/yr spending $2000 on a Chanel handbag.
Who in they're right mind would ever consider such a thing!
Our morals our totally screwed up. Thank you media and capitalism on crack!
"Our economy needs grounding based on something other than consumerism!"
How exactly do you propose we do that? But I do agree, the extreme materialism is a serious problem, and seems to have gotten worse in the last decade. The advertisers use marketing tactics that prey on people's psychological weaknesses to make them want stuff that they don't need. And when a Wal-Mart employee is trampled to death by frenzied shoppers, most who did not even help the man as he died; when something that grotesque happens, then its pretty clear that materialism has become like a mental illness warping society's minds.
Yet at the same time, the economy does need people to spend money now. Unemployment is very high, and unless the economy improves, more jobs will be lost. So while materialism is bad, people losing jobs is worse.
Sorry, but my child just turn 13 year old and is already in high school and won student of the month and made honor roll, plus he is a good, honest ,hardworking kid who never ask for anything, he wants that ROCKBAND 2 game that cost $189.99!
We told him that we will see if we can afford it and he is fine if we do not buy it and would be happy with any little thing ,but that is more reason for us to get it for him.
Although I understand the overall gist of this article, I disagree with the notion that connecting with friends and loved ones ought to be a once-a-year seasonal thing. I mean, is someone really a friend or a loved one if you only connect with them once a year?
I do agree that de-emphasizing materialism is a good idea, at least within reason. After all, sometimes a well thought-out material gift can create a lot of happiness. And our economy depends on there being a very materialistic December each year.
Yes, the last thing I need is a bunch of blasted spam e-cards. If you care at all, pay less than $1 a card, including postage, by buying a box of holiday cards and mail out a holiday letter with it. Show that you care more than sitting in front of a computer and send mass e-cards.
Hear hear! We are also being so manipulated at Xmas time. They raise prices for the big day and then lower them a day later. I also never understood the idea of each family cutting down a tree, decorating it and then throwing it in the garbage. Why not plant a tree? Are we teaching our kids that things are supposed to be appreciated for a short period and then tossed? Seems the exact opposite of what we should be doing. But the herd bleats we're the crazy ones if we don't follow along. The gift wrapping and excess packaging all goes into overflowing landfills. I'm all for stimulating the economy, but not with dollar store tinsel and wicker reindeers.
Why is it so hard for people to see the arbitrary ritual and ridiculousness of Xmas? Because they have their fondest memories associated with Xmas - as children, we've given more presents then we know what to do with. This is pure consumerist conditioning, teaching small children to value gifts and presents on the supposed birthday of Jesus Christ, who renounced all worldly possessions to demonstrate that materialism is the root of all evil. Nice.
Excellent thoughts on the tree.
I don't have to worry about this.I live in a family of atheists,who don't celebrate the imaginary birth of the imaginary child of an imaginary deity.
for the past 10 years the only people who get presents from me are the children.
Adults are on their own.
I do plenty of second-hand shopping throughout the year (that is where I buy most of the things I own, and no, they are not high-priced antiques from antique malls). If I happen to come across something I know someone will like and they can use, I buy it and pass it along. So, for me, giving is pretty much year-round and it's all recycled stuff and it's cheap.
Kids, however, do get presents, but now that most are teenagers, they get $20 each and the last two under the age of 15 get one decent present that I know will be used. It never costs more than $75.
I budget for Christmas. $300 for presents, $100 for a tree and goodies. It has worked well.
The school system where I live has adopted uniforms so my younger brother has to wear them. The catch is that my family has to pay for them and they are not cheap. My mother has spent the whole year buying the things her family that they need. We just got our fall/winter wardrobes this month. It's averaged 40 something degrees every day. My parents work themselves to death in order to to provide for their family and because of schedules and tight finances they won't even be able to do anything for their anniversary this year. So forgive me if I'd like to get them something to show how much I appreciate them being there, helping me financially and never thinking of themselves as they do it. I get the greatest gift all year 'round, Christmas is how I repay them with a fraction of the love they give me. If that's materialistic then sign me up.
I posted this earlier but here it is again: My husband and I have been discussing this new phenomena--the give no gifts, buy nothing for a year, live incredibly frugally, etc, etc. What we've noticed is that not a single one of these new trend setters is a parent of a young child. I swear, I shop almost exclusively for clothes at thrift stores, but even then, she grows like a weed, and I end up having to buy her new stuff very frequently. Have any of you frugal gurus ever thought about how you sound to a parent? Sorry, Suzie, but those pants that are now mid calf are going to have to see you through for another year, as I'm not spending anything for a year. Please....
Ever notice how it is the upper class that looks down at the unwashed masses and suggests "There isn't a single material thing I've ever received that could compare to time well-spent with friends."
It must be nice to be able to afford any material thing you want, so why ask for it as a gift if you can simply go and get it on a whim whenever you want? For some of the unwashed masses, the holidays are the one time of the year we get to be materialistic. I open a savings account every January and save throughout the year for the holidays. I closed the account last week and spent every last penny on gifts I know my friends and family could not afford to just go out and buy on their own.
I find it disturbing that someone as rich as Oprah would use her status to push for thriftiness. If you do not want for anything, how can you tell others what they don't need?
Amen.
My wife and I run a small retail store that we own ourselves. It is a true mom and pop operation. We opened it because we were both laid off from our jobs and we decided to take some control of our own lives. Last year we made less than minimum wage and this year we probably won't break even unless we have an unusually good holiday season. About the only satisfaction we get is from customers who express their appreciation for the character and uniqueness the store brings to our community.
According to your wonderful, thoughtful sentiments, I guess my wife, 4-month old daughter and I should take an extended vacation from paying our mortgage and putting food on our table for, I don't know, the rest of our lives perhaps? And maybe we should wish for a handout from one of those charities you're all donating to (after we become homeless and after the management has skimmed off their six-figure salaries first, of course).
Not every business is a corporate-owned big box like Wal Mart. Small businesses like mine really count on this time of year to make ends meet (especially if we haven't been able to do so the rest of the year). Don't count us out.
Zillacabra,
Keep in mind this article is written by a women who put "...over a decade of experience in the international luxury goods sector..." in her bio. Guess she has enough money that if people quit buying international luxury goods, that she could survive. Or perhaps you will see her in front of you in line at the homeless shelter, but I would guess not.
I'm all for people giving thoughtful gifts rather than meaningless ones, and think there should be less emphasis on consumerism. BUT now is NOT a good time to encourage people to stop buying presents altogether. The economy is in serious trouble, and people are not spending as much money as they should be, and some say this is causing deflation. Besides, I'm sure some stores benefit tremendously from increased revenues during the holiday season, and some probably depend on it for their livelihood. Although, this is all assuming people can afford to buy some presents for friends/family. If its going to hurt you financially to buy presents, by all means, buy less expensive gifts or do something else instead.
The "Now is not a Good Time" refrain is the favorite of addicts from smokers to drinkers to hard drug users. Its the Monday morning diet. Its never going to be a "good time"...bu
phlashba-
Honestly I don't see the point. If you cannot afford presents, that's one thing, and buying (or making) thoughtful gifts rather than expensive crap, that's fine too. But just deciding not to give presents on Xmas seems a bit drastic. And frankly, if you have kids who are expecting presents, I think its mean. Think back to how big a deal Christmas was when you were a kid. Imagine if the ending of "A Christmas Story" was changed so that little Ralphie doesn't get his BB-gun. It would suck. I don't think there's anything inherently wrong with materialism & enjoying (both giving & receiving) presents on Xmas, its only a problem when it starts to overshadow what's really important- the enjoyment of time spent with loved ones (or people you don't really like, by have to spend time with by default), alcoholic egg nog, cookies, Christmas music on the radio and movies on TV, everyone being in the "spirit of the season", the fun that comes with decorating the tree, as well as shopping for gifts for people and wrapping the presents. And if you're a Christian (I'm not), all that stuff about Jesus. Personally I LOVE everything about Christmas. It is the most fun time of year. I'm not a materialistic person at all, so the presents are a small part of the fun. So I don't really see the need change it.
2/2
And I'm not really sure its analogous to addiction.
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