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Laura Brady Saade

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The Wimpy Way To Be Fearless: Just Do It For 10 Minutes!

Posted: 07/05/2012 8:06 am

I am a girl high on dreams, but short on the confidence that I can achieve them. Long on goals, but short on attention span. I'm the one who, in college, would head to the library laden with a backpack bursting with books -- only to arrive and fall fast asleep a half hour in, overwhelmed by the idea that I couldn't study hard enough or wasn't smart enough. My roommates thought I was studious with a 4.0 average. In fact, I was an average student who crumbled under pressure.

Not much has changed. I have rarely been able to pull off an all-nighter for anything other than a party. I'm a slow and steady girl: I do ambitious things (climbing Mount Whitney; running marathons), but very slowly.

For a long time, this mindset psyched me out. Without bursts of energy, how would I get anything of merit done? Then one day, I fell upon an approach to life that works for me: I ask only 10 minutes of myself. I know it sounds wimpy and way too superficial -- what of merit, you say, can be accomplished in 10 minutes? That's what I thought, too. And then I learned....

Ten minutes at a time is my slow-and-steady way of being fearless. Little by little I chip away at a goal, safely, somewhat risk-free. Do I take the world by storm? Have I ever been an overnight success? No and no. But slow and steady is better than not at all, and so I inch along, gradually working up to running a full marathon and climbing the tallest peak in the continental United States, among other things.

This 10-minute plan is perfectly tailored to me and maybe to you, too. Here are the symptoms: short attention span, lots of other pulls on your time, the dread of unpleasant tasks, the fear of not succeeding at something new, the worry that you'll be devastated if you put too much heart and soul into something and then fail.

That's me in a nutshell, and if you suffer from any of those symptoms for four hours or more, you may have the same syndrome. Here's the antidote: Take 10 minutes each day and apply them directly to the task at hand. Repeat daily until task is complete.

I'm not proud of only having enough stamina for 10 minutes of effort at a time. The only saving grace is, it works. I do envy those people who decide on Friday they'll plant a garden over the weekend and, boom, by Monday it's done. Or they decide to paint a room and somehow pick a color, move the furniture, and apply three coats before I've finished that week's laundry. But I've finally accepted that's not me.

There are good side effects to this 10-minute tack, though: increased stamina and motivation. I may tell myself that I'm going in (to the pile on my desk, the box of photos, the cluttered garage) for just 10 minutes. But by the end of the 10 minutes, I realize it's not so scary and not so overwhelming and I can do it. Sometimes I stay a little (or a lot) longer and press on. Or I do my 10 minutes, log a little bit of progress, and know that I'm not so scared to come back and continue tomorrow.

My kids think I've gone a little overboard with this 10-minute thing. I wear my sports watch all the time, setting the timer for pretty much everything. Sorting insurance paperwork (yuck)? Give it 10 minutes. Planning how to save for college (where to start)? Give it 10 minutes. Kitchen is a mess (who wants to waste the time)? Give it 10 minutes.

This not only works for mundane goals, but bigger, life-changing goals, too. I got back to playing the piano after a 20-year hiatus by wading in just 10 minutes at a time. For years I'd thought it would take me forever to get back to where I had been, and I didn't even know where my music was or what I'd play. Within a few days I was on the path: found the sheet music one day, picked a song the next, found a place to set up the electronic keyboard, and was on my way. After years of the goal lingering out there, it really only took about three 10-minute bursts to get on track.

It works for those big "Where do I even start?" goals, too. A couple friends and I wanted to start an organization to raise awareness of nonprofits we and other friends were involved with. Sounded like a good idea for "someday" -- too much to think about while life was so busy. I decided to take a crack at it 10 minutes at a time (one day thought through who we'd invite; one day thought about mission; another day about schedule, etc.). Within a month of 10-minute-a-day planning, we were up and running and had our first meeting scheduled. Now we have over 100 members and have raised thousands of dollars for many nonprofits. And the look of the project now is very different from what we'd envisioned. I could have been stalled from starting anything because I thought it had to be "perfect" from the start, but really it was fine to just get it off the ground and let it evolve.

As my cousin says, "Poco a poco" -- little by little. I may not win the race, but I do finish. And that's about right for me.

For more by Laura Brady Saade, click here.

For more on becoming fearless, click here.

 
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I am a girl high on dreams, but short on the confidence that I can achieve them. Long on goals, but short on attention span. I'm the one who, in college, would head to the library laden with a backpac...
I am a girl high on dreams, but short on the confidence that I can achieve them. Long on goals, but short on attention span. I'm the one who, in college, would head to the library laden with a backpac...
 
 
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04:17 PM on 07/13/2012
Laura, I love your article!
I can stay on task if it is something I enjoy. I can spend 6 to 8 hours on the computer without any distractions. However, everyday cleaning tasks are so difficult. Vacuuming, folding clothes, mopping floors, etc. don't hold my attention. Last night, after reading your article, I decided to try your 10 minute theory. My mantra became I can do anything for 10 minutes! When the clothes dryer indicated that the clothes were dry, I made the decision to take them out and fold them instead of just leaving them for the morning. Timing myself was important, so I set the timer, in just 10 minutes, the clothes were folded and put away. Now, I don't have the ironing task which I hate!
Now, I know I can do anything for 10 minutes!
Thanks for a solution to my procrastinating on boring, mundane tasks.
Just 10 minutes, just 10 minutes! I can do it!
Thanks! My husband thanks you, too.
02:30 PM on 07/15/2012
good for you! i do the same thing that you do -- i think folding the laundry will take forever, but when i actually time it, it's faster than i'd thought (and no ironing!)
03:39 PM on 07/13/2012
Very helpful! Some goals - big or small - can seem herculean. However a 10 minute per day investment seems both manageable and less risky. Thanks for a great and honest article!
02:33 PM on 07/15/2012
yes, herculean indeed...
11:44 PM on 07/10/2012
I feel like the Scarecrow - "But that's so easy, I should have thought of it for (myself)."... 10-minutes at a time is brilliant in it's simplicity and a reminder that my perfectionism is probably my biggest self-imposed obstacle. Thank you, Laura (and to your readers for some great comments) ...I can already see endless ways to apply this approach ;)
02:37 PM on 07/15/2012
i agree -- i think i can't do something "perfectly" unless i have a big chunk of time to dedicate to it (and i never have a big chunk). i have to remind myself to lower the bar if i'm going to get anything done...
10:57 PM on 07/10/2012
Great advice for procrastinators!
02:40 PM on 07/15/2012
thanks, lady lexie... and who isn't?
03:21 PM on 07/10/2012
It also works for exercise, too. and once you start you will usually wind up doing more!!
10:53 PM on 07/10/2012
absolutely -- and if you don't, you know you're blessedly allowed to stop soon...
01:54 PM on 07/10/2012
I really needed that - thanks so much for sharing. Now ... what to do for the next 10 minutes? :)
02:37 PM on 07/10/2012
...ah, the possibilities!
02:39 PM on 07/09/2012
Love this post! I love the ideal of doing something for 10 minutes because it makes it so manageable. I have always used the '10 minute tidy up' with my kids ~ they tidy up their bedroom/toys for 10 minutes only at a time, but I'm amazed at how much they can put away in that short space of time!
02:35 PM on 07/10/2012
the kids are just like us -- they can't bear the thought of getting started with the tidyup but are probably very proud when they're done!
11:09 AM on 07/06/2012
Very motivating article! Thank you Laura!
12:01 AM on 07/07/2012
i'm glad -- thank you!
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05:42 PM on 07/05/2012
Great method that I have recommended to clients, who have used it successfully for years. For example, writing that book seems daunting? Set a goal to write 3 to 4 sentences. Most people will write more, sometimes completing several paragraphs or pages because the motion stimulates your emotions and it actually becomes hard to stop. Set a goal to run or walk 5 minutes on the treadmill and you might find yourself consistently doing an hour after a few weeks. Upset about a flat tire? Set a goal to stay completely positive for 5 minutes while you deal with it.
08:03 PM on 07/06/2012
i will have to remember your "3-4 sentences" goal -- and apply to 3-4 dishes, 3-4 pieces of paper in the inbox, etc. -- 3-4 sounds so doable...
03:44 PM on 07/05/2012
Lordy, this is so pathetic - perhaps you would begin to do better if you
stopped referring to yourself as "girl" -- what do you think?
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dpkjj
Peace on Earth
02:08 PM on 07/05/2012
It's a great system. I've been using it for years. It doesn't have to be 10 minutes - it can be 5 or 15 or 20, but it works. You just tell yourself "I can certainly stand doing this for X minutes." Of course, sometimes you get started and get on a roll and just keep on going.

As I get older and deal with an aching back, it is actually imperative for some things like making the bed or gardening or standing and folding clothes or cooking.
02:26 PM on 07/05/2012
i totally agree, dpkjj -- the time can expand or contract depending on just how much we can bear or how much we have time for. "just two more minutes...just one more minute..." makes it tolerable -- and then the clothes are folded!
09:55 PM on 07/10/2012
I agree too. I was recently widowed while in the process of moving to another state. What a nightmare. Then one afternoon it dawned on me that I just need to decide what it was I was going to do that day, even if it was only to pack 2 boxes of books and feed the dogs. It works. And I don't end up feeling like I'm a dope who can't do anything.
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dpkjj
Peace on Earth
11:20 PM on 07/10/2012
I am so sorry for your loss.  Sometimes all we can do is put one foot in front of the other.  Bless you for your courage.
01:16 PM on 07/05/2012
Laura has hit upon an awesome motivator. Her premise is the theme of a book entitled "The Slight Edge" as well. The book also explains that huge accomplishments are not done overnight, that instead they are accomplished slowly, putting in a little effort everyday. Laura quantifies the idea and I love it. She puts a frame around the time and that makes things a whole lot easier. She provides the key to make any task less intimidating. Thank you, love this concept!
02:28 PM on 07/05/2012
thanks, bluewater32, for the tip -- i will look for "The Slight Edge"...
12:48 PM on 07/05/2012
The secret revealed! Laura -- who I've known since college, worked beside, remianed friends with, and even co-founded the charitable salon she mentions (teaandempathyla.org) -- is one of those people who seems to accomplish everything she sets out to do with grace and style. Even while raising three children, she finds time to do meaningful charitable work and be a tremendously supportive friend to her friends. And now we know how she does it! She is living proof her Give Me 10 approach works. I recommend checking out her site -- giveme10.info -- it's full of great ideas so the rest of us can start accomplishing goals in ten minutes a day too.
02:30 PM on 07/05/2012
thank you, eatplaylove, for all the support! YOU are the good friend...
12:33 PM on 07/05/2012
I like this idea quite a bit. I'm always overwhelmed by the mountains of projects I have.

To do lists help a lot as well. I love checking off boxes and writing new lists.
02:31 PM on 07/05/2012
i love checking off, too! to the point where i will write down a task AFTER i've done it just so i can check it off!
03:30 PM on 07/05/2012
My favorite To Do List:

1. Make To Do List
2. Check of box for Making To Do List
3. Take Nap to reward yourself for having accomplished two things on your to-do list.
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Toogee
2G or not 2G?
10:27 AM on 07/05/2012
“I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.”
― Frank Herbert, Dune
02:38 PM on 07/05/2012
Thanks, Toogee -- great quote. I will post it on the quotes section of GiveMe10.info!