I recently began dating again after years of really "goofing off" about the matter. The fact is -- having been widowed quite young -- jumping back into the dating pool sounded better to my "conscious" than my "subconscious" despite all evidence to the contrary. Convenient excuses such as children and career made it that much easier to remain detached. Now -- some 12 years and many lifetimes later -- I've found myself ready to embark upon the rest of my journey with someone special and with that, has come a few new revelations about myself I would have never expected if asked prior to today, including the fact that I'm "good" with dating "grandfathers."
Notice I said "grandfathers" and not just "older men" (of whom I don't discount but who remain vastly different than their counterparts whose own children have children). At 47-years-old and amply wealthy on my own, I've found a great deal of reason to date men whose own children have children -- much of which stem from their highly developed views on family and life overall. The fact is, there seems to be an imaginary line men leap over when they move from fatherhood to grand-fatherhood and that line opens the door to a kind of "sexiness" very few men without grandchildren know.
With this in mind, I've pulled together 10 very compelling reasons for women to consider dating men at this later stage in life that expand well beyond financial security (the reason most commonly attributed to making such a choice):
1.They embrace your children as their own. Men who are also grandfathers seem to take the attitude "the more, the merrier." This relaxed demeanor helps to circumvent unnecessary anxiety when merging families.
2.Their wisdom and experience brings perspective where it might otherwise not be. Men who have fostered careers and led their families through many stages bring beneficial long-term perspective to their younger partners who might now be doing the same.
3.They are well-balanced, possessing a keen sense of priorities and placement thereof. In other words, men who are grandfathers don't always accept "business calls" during moments of personal importance, realizing that "life" is too short to be "professionally accessible" all the time.
4.They are gentlemen. Men of this age and stage realize that manners and respectable behavior matter well beyond what society currently accepts.
5.They are the first to accept "imperfection." Coping with the "realities" of life has seasoned men in this realm to accept and even embrace other's "humanness" in ways that fosters comfort, appreciation, and subsequent wisdom.
6.They are interesting and active. With healthcare being what it is today, men of this age and stage men are living longer and embracing their families and life overall more heartily than ever before.
7.They love sex and intimacy. Don't let their age fool you, men who are also called "grandpa" aren't old when it comes to sexual "desire" and their need for emotional contact with their partners.
8.They possess a sophistication and confidence that is wildly attractive. No doubt, this combination is the catalyst for many a Winter-Spring romance (playing right into the hands of women's innate desire for security).
9.They take pride in their position as "patriarch" of the larger family. Men who are also grandfathers adore being able to care for their entire families when necessity or opportunity dictates, providing a sense of purpose of which others cannot fulfill.
10.They realize their responsibility and place in the world beyond themselves. Men who are also grandfathers understand the need to "add value" where others may not, remaining fully aware of the generational impact of actively making life better for all through charitable giving and participation.
So you see, it is for these reasons and many more which go un-noted, that I have reconsidered my position on dating men who are also grandfathers. Truth-be-told, as my friend, Jo, reminded me, it is hard enough finding a suitable mate today without overlooking a wonderful man just because he has graduated well-beyond me in age and status. This isn't to say, younger men -- who are still in the throes of fatherhood -- are not to be considered. It just means that I am no longer disqualifying men who have moved on from this stage to the next simply because their seniority in life has brought forth the privilege of being called "grandpa."
That kind of thinking is just plain "outdated" in my opinion... if not "old" altogether. It's a mindset that deserves to be buried in pursuit of happiness and a thriving relationship -- don't you think!
Earlier on Huff/Post50:
