What Do Hillary Women Want?
You've no doubt heard the media reiterating talking points about how the way to win the votes of women is to hit hard on economic issues since those are the issues that impact families with painful immediacy. There's some validity to that point. After all, many of the women who were and who remain most strongly identified with Hillary are mothers. We care about our loved ones. We carry the burden of trying to make it work when the ends don't meet the middle. We worry about the future. A lot.
However, if you listen closely, you'll also hear the unwritten assumption that appears to constitute the Obama campaign's strategy toward this large, critical and, usually, faithfully Democratic demographic: "Well, who else are they going to vote for anyway? Let's focus our energies on the Independents" I think of this as the "we've got them by their Roe v. Wade" presumption. The thought also has some validity since the stakes are certainly very high. However, especially with McCain's campaign aggressively courting Hillary supporters, Obama cannot afford to presume anyone's automatic support.
This was no ordinary primary season for Democrats. Women and people of color have been disenfranchised and taken for granted by the Democratic Party for years. This time, however, we were able to back candidates (candidates who actually had a chance to win) with whom we could personally identify. Whether you are a woman, a person of color, some other kind of "other" or some combination of the prior groups, the experience of witnessing a biracial man and a woman as the two final potential Democratic presidential candidates was powerful.
What continues to make it hard for many of us to commit to the Obama cause is his very lack of overt commitment to us. He and his campaign have focused too much on Hillary Clinton herself and missed countless opportunities to reach out directly to those of us who supported her. He seems to feel it is sufficient to lump us into his idealistically inclusive "we," and, in doing so, he fails both to respect and to witness the enormity of our loss. For it was our loss as women, not just Hillary Clinton's. The reality is that we are not bitter. We are grieving.
For all of us, not just Obama supporters, this Democratic primary season evoked intense emotions. We were called upon to be hopeful and we were. We dared to set free longings and desires so deep and personal that they have been contained historically in the secret places within our individual and collective psyches. And, now, some of those longings have been at least partially fulfilled. And some have not. The grief of those of us whose longings were once again thwarted accounts for much of the continuing resistance of Hillary supporters.
So what do we grieving women want from Obama? We want him to acknowledge that our hope was as valid as the hope of his supporters and that our longing will not go unrecognized. We want him to claim our loss as his own on behalf of his daughters and to speak to women's issues directly. In a very real sense, Hillary's loss is a loss for all of us. I celebrate the fact that countless children of all races and skin color will now see a world with new possibilities. But I mourn to my core that my daughter, like Obama's daughters, will most likely not see a woman president within my lifetime.
So, with all due respect to Michelle Obama (and I do mean real respect: she's strong without apology and we love her for it) and even Hillary herself, we do not want only to hear campaign surrogates giving us lip service. No, we want to hear from the man himself that he will represent and defend our interests and the interests of all of our daughters with ferocity. We want him to commit to us overtly and specifically, because the unfortunate reality is that we do not yet live in a society that transcends gender.
Barack Obama has the opportunity in both his acceptance speech and the campaign ahead to do what he has not yet done: to recognize and respect the intensity our grief by speaking directly to us and our issues and then to challenge us to partner with him to mobilize that intensity to bring about change for all of our daughters. The onus is on you, Senator Obama. Speak to us. We'll be listening.
Leah McElrath Renna is a mother, a professional psychotherapist and a Managing Partner of the communications-consulting firm, Renna Communications.
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Yet another embarrassing, petulant, piece by someone claiming to represent 'women' as the Democratic convention begins.
Lots of women paid their dues. Lots of women worked and voted for Democrats this year who are not Hillary Clinton.
When my candidate pulled out I moved to Obama because Hillary Clinton's campaign was negative, all about her, because she voted for the war, and because her New York surrogates - Cuomo, Kerrey, Bill Clinton - used race as a wedge issue. She said her role model was Margaret Thatcher.
I didn't think she could lead the country.
You want acknowledgment? So do I.
By the way, how about the men who voted for Hillary, especially the Limbaugh men? Are you fighting for them too?
Acknowlegement? Obama has given Hillary acknowlegment time and time again. What has she given back? No much so far.
The underlying attitude of "who else are you going to vote for" is there not because the Obama camp put it there or want it there but because it is a natural byproduct of the circumstances. Obama did not get to select who he was running against. It just so happens to be someone who has a horrible personal and political record when it comes to women's issues.
If Hillary supporters cannot or will not see this, for whatever reason, and vote for McCain, they cannot blame Obama when they and their daughters' are unable to obtain birth control and all of their reproductive rights have been strippedl by a McCain appointed Supreme Court,
This possibility should not be viewed as "a threat from the Obama Camp" but very realistic based on McCain's views, the people who surround him and the current makeup of the Court.
What would you call a group of voters who vote against the very issues that only affect them because they are angry/hurt at a person that supports these issues?
What has HRC done for Obama? Let's see - raised millions, campaigned for him in NV and FL while he was on vacation, asked her supporters to vote for Obama, endorsed him, released her delegates.
.....Self-
" We dared to set free longings and desires so deep and personal that they have been contained historically in the secret places within our individual and collective psyches."
Leah, you missed your true calling as a romance novelist.
This is very simple. Disappointment is a fact of life. It's is not up to Obama to soothe your hurt feelings. Sometimes, you will lose. You can not always get what you want. Suck it up. When you vote, you must vote responsibly, or you will likely suffer the consequences of a McCain presidency. If that comes to pass, it would be unacceptable for you to say "Obama was mean to Hillary". You must accept responsibility for your own actions. It's time to stop whining and grow up and be an adult.
Nothing short of Obama declining the nomination and begging Hillary to accept would appease these people.
THE PRIMARY IS OVER, SHE LOST! GET YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR A.., AND LETS MOVE ON.
You know were the positions reversed, Obama would have worked his arse off to get that woman elected. He would not have whined about the media, women, white people, poor people, etc... It's like I am living with my ex-wife.
BINGO Finally somebody said it. And I am a woman. I would have done the same if she acted like some of these people.
Your attitude does women a disservice, inasmuch as it implies when we don't get our way we need an apology for the insensitivity of others. The disservice is that the argument can be made that women are too emotional to be clearheaded when it's important to be clearheaded.
This primary season was unique in that there were two viable candidates who look different than anyone who preceded them. I am the mother of three children, two of whom are daughters. How exciting it is for all of my children to witness a woman as a possible candidate for the presidency. Also, how exciting it was for them to witness the selection of our candidate.
This is a race that has run and now it's time to move on to the general election. Most women I know would have loved to have a woman as the Democratic nominee. Even more, however, they want to see a change for the better. If Hillary Clinton was the one to deliver it, she would have won the nomination. If she had, she would have my wholehearted support. It would be for the good of my party.
Grow up--women aren't owed anything other than the opportunity to prove ourselves, as men can. When we do so and fail, we need to try harder next time.
women aren't owed anything other than the opportunity to prove ourselves, as men can. When we do so and fail, we need to try harder next time.
Most people understand that for every one time they win, they've lost 2 or 3 times before. For women who want a female nominee, this is just one of those 2 or 3 losses. I think Barack understands that, which is why he doesn't have the bleak outlook that a woman won't be president in the VERY near future.
The author is asking Barack to adopt her bleak outlook.
It's important for us to recognize our own personal depression
The author is asking Barack to give energy and acknowledgment to a pessimism that he does not feel. Depression and a refusal to see the positive side of things, causes us to walk toward the darkness. Certainly, voting for McCain out of pessimism would be walking toward the darkness..
Yes. Exactly. What conservatives take away from this is that women don't understand how to play competitive games like politics. They'll trot out that women don't learn enough of the lessons as men who grow up more so playing team sports, etc. Mike Barnacle is saying exactly this right now on MSNBC. "The one thing that Americans understand, coast to coast, is winners and losers. They understand [how you're supposed to behave] when you lose. This is a dicey situation.
Let's face it, if Obama wins the election it will be a miracle, which is sad given the state of the opposing party these days. The Clintons were not just blowing hot air when they argued that Hillary was far more electable than Obama. They're doing their obligatory part by forcefully urging her supporters to back him, but if he loses, which I think is more likely than ever now, they will have been proven right despite their own efforts, and this country will have to wait till 2012 to get what it could have had in 2008.
If Obama loses it is HILLARY CLINTON'S FAULT.
Don't assume that if he loses, she wins in '12. Under no circumstances will I and others vote for her. After all we're not "hard working white americans.
All this childishne
Who the hell do you think you are!?!?!?!
How do you figure you people are so much more special and important than every other voter?
You need a special vote, you need a special outreach, you need, need, need, need! It's pathetic - how can you manage to do this without being embarrassed???
This is the bottom line - you have to vote for someone for president (unless you're a clown and refuse to vote). The idea, as prescribed by the founders and later fixed by amendment, is to cast a vote for the person who you think will do the best job at leading the country.
If your "best" candidate is only the one that kisses your rear ends, then you aren't just misguided, misunderstood, or disaffected - you're a blight on our republic, part of the problem set that is disintegrating our society.
Let's try this again. My comment is much less abusive than many of the ones that got posted. But you deleted it. I didn't personally assault you. I simply questioned whether you actually believed what you're saying. I'll try taking off a couple rough edges and hope you see fit to post it this time.
I find it hard to believe you mean what you're saying. This reminds me of the people who say Mr. O lacks specifics about his policies, while not taking the time to read the pages and pages of policy specifics on his website.
Try this for size: I voted FOR Mr. O. And I'm upset. I want to be acknowledged and he hasn't done it yet! What is wrong with this world? Sounds dumb doesn't it? Not as dumb as for people who voted AGAINST him to want special acknowledgment and recognition. Especially considering the dirty "kitchen-sink" campaign tactics of HRC.
HRC's loss is not a loss to all women. Bill and HRC have shown repeatedly that "it's all about them". If it seems that Mr. O has been spending too much effort on HRC and not as much on her supporters, I suggest it's due to those two playing victims ever since June.
Although your daughter may well not see a female US president in YOUR lifetime, I propose the odds of her seeing one in HER lifetime are very good. Isn't that what's more important?
I see. So in order to get your support, Obama needs to cater to your whining whims and bow his head to you acknowledging your importance?
Get over yourself. If you don't want to support Obama then you're supporting McCain and although I remember Hillary's 100% praise of Mr. John "I've voted with Bush 95% of the time" McCain and tore into a fellow Democratic candidate, I didn't think you and your ilk would go so far as to blackmail Obama!
It's the Clintons and YOU "sour grapes' Hillary bots that are destroying the Democratic Party just so you can force Obama to acknowledge that it's never going to be a black man's but a Southern WHITE man's party, the party of Clinton.
I voted for Edwards and chose HIM as my candidate but he didn't make it. Did I whine about wanting Obama to 'acknowledge' me? No. I knew that the majority wanted Obama or Clinton and since Hillary's NEVER apologized for her Iraq resolution vote KNOWING Bush was a liar and was itching for war, I chose Obama.
Get over yourselves, please. You're an embarrassment to women who are real Democrats and know what the stakes are, not the Clintonites Dems that refuse to vote for Mr. Darkie.
The media is doing a jedi mind trick on Clinton supporters. You think McCain is gonna fight for your interests in the White House?? Gimme a break!
Do you know what he calls his wife off camera??
The one he cheated with after his first marriage.
I understand grieving because a candidate you poured your heart and soul into came in second. I understand how difficult it is to transfer enthusiastic support to the candidate against whom you've worked for many months. I understand it. I've lived through it. I feel your pain.
And I say, "get over it."
We don't have the luxury of prolonged grief. We don't have the time to wallow in self-indulgent "might have beens." We don't have the political capital to waste on whining.
Barack Obama has repeatedly honored Hillary Clinton. Time and again, he has acknowledged her worthiness as an adversary. He's bent over backwards to include her in this convention. He 's been more gracious to his defeated opponent than any candidate I have seen in my 40 years of political involvement.
As a woman in her 50s and a feminist since high school, I confess my embarrassment at the behavior of some of Hillary's supporters. I'm embarrassed by my sisters who demand the hairpats that say "Yes, dear you are important and your disappointment is valid." Of course you are important. Of course your disappointment is valid. If feminism has taught us anything, it's that we own the power to validate our own feelings and experiences. We don't need anyone else, male or female, to do that for us.
Grow up, Leah. And get over it. There is more at stake here than your feelings, and we need your help to make it happen.
"We don't have the luxury of prolonged grief. We don't have the time to wallow in self-indulgent "might have beens." We don't have the poltiical capital to waste on whining."
Exacatly. Haven't Democrats and many Independents in this country learned their lessons from the elections of 2000 and 2004? We can spend all of our energies asking "what might have been" but it is time to move forward with that you can control and change.
I am also a middle-aged woman who is a life-long feminist. I didn't get that this blog was about acknowledging Hillary, but rather women in this country who are constantly getting screwed. As a former Clinton supporter, i'm painfully aware of her many failings, but as someone who watched every second of the primaries, I know that Obama has many failings also. I absolutely don't agree that he has been gracious. I mean really...h
"I absolutely don't agree that he has been gracious. I mean really...h
If you don't recognize just how offensive your statement is --- Your attitudes are an embarrassment to real women everywhere.
First of all, I was responding to Leah Renna about her own desire to be acknowledged, not Hillary Clinton's. Secondly, Michelle Obama is speaking, as many candidate spouses have spoken at the convention; she is NOT giving the keynote address. Had you bothered to check the multiple sources available for the convention schedule, you would know that Mark Warner is giving the keynote address. It would be very atypical for a second-place candidate to be invited to give the keynote address.
If women got screwed this election season, it was not by Barack Obama. It was by the people who mismanaged Hillary Clinton's campaign.
Let's advance feminism by voting for the person who voted against schip and equal pay, who has a 0 percent rating from NARAL and who has made cruel jokes about the appearance of a 17 year old Chelsea Clinton, rape by a gorilla, and laughed when a person in his audience said "How do we beat th b----ch" . Hillary Clinton lost because she ran a bad campaign. It got better towards the end, but all in all....Hil
It's become sadly clear what the "Hillary women" (i.e. PUMAs) want: Hillary and they'll accept nothing else.
Since she suspended her campaign, Senator Clinton (and this isn't a knock on her, just some of the idiots who claim to support her) has been treated more than fairly by the Obama campaign. Her campaign's efforts have been duly acknowledged as a historic effort, she'll get a roll call nomination vote and a prime speaking spot at the convention. That's a more than fair accomodation and a damn sight more than any of the other losing candidates got.
But that's not enough for the "Hillary women" (PUMAs), they're not interested in compromise, only capitulation. Unless Hillary in the nominee, they'll cite some slight (real or imagined) as an excuse to vote for McCain or just stay home because they have placed their own pettiness and hurt pride above the good of the nation and of the world. In the end, the PUMA people aren't Hillary supporters, they just really, really hate Obama.
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