Elizabeth Edwards has built up a tremendous reserve of public support and respect. It's earned. She's smart, accomplished, articulate and has suffered far more than her share of personal tragedy. But she also chose to launch a celebrity (sorta) tell-all book called Resilience that covers her husband John Edward's affair and so she opens herself and her relationship up as a subject of public discussion.
So let's be clear; in equal proportion to her victimhood, Elizabeth Edwards also aided and abetted her husband in deceiving Democratic voters on an unprecedented scale.
She helped her husband commit an odd sort of fraud - taking money from thousands of people under false premises, in a sort of personality Ponzi scheme that would have made Bernie Madoff blush. Elizabeth Edwards knew that narrative of the Edwards's personal relationship was a winner with voters and she helped spin it. She was an active part of his campaign and not just for policy reasons.
Electoral politics is, after all, only partially about policy. Elizabeth humanized John Edwards. He's a guy who oozed smarmy, insincere, self-centered lawyer but he's married to Elizabeth, so he might be okay. Elizabeth wasn't a trophy wife; she was a real woman and their love affair story was spiked with elements that gave Edwards more depth, a sense of a man deeper than first appearances.
Together, John and Elizabeth spun the stories in an effort to gain donations and votes. The details they told were true. Anniversaries at the fast food restaurant Wendy's. Her battle with cancer. The unfathomable loss of their son. These facts were and are real but they served as misdirection to another reality - that John Edwards had undertaken an emotional and sexual affair with a campaign worker named Rielle Hunter.
Elizabeth knew.
She knew that her husband had used campaign money to pay his mistress to travel with him. In her book, she apparently claims that she urged her husband to end his Presidential bid...but she kept helping him raise money. She allowed their personal narrative to be the subject of story after story and even stepped it up when her cancer returned.
I've spoken with Edwards supporters who gave him thousands of dollars of hard earned money because they believed in him. Some even convinced other family members to donate to Edwards. They felt betrayed and angry. Had they known the truth, their money could have gone to other candidates or other causes or just stayed in the bank.
The story of the Edwards affair isn't finished, though. There are still lingering lies and a woman waiting and a baby with no father listed on the birth certificate. Those don't seem to be any concern of Elizabeth Edwards's, either.
Given her entire situation - the children, the cancer, the ugly public nature of it all - I understand why Elizabeth might be inclined to believe John Edward's continued lies.
For reasons I've outlined in earlier pieces here at HuffPost, I believe that John Edwards met with Rielle Hunter at the Beverly Hills Hilton more than just the one time that he was caught. In other words, months after admitting the affair he had while running for President to Elizabeth, he met Hunter secretly at a hotel room, with her child present.
Why would he do this? The most obvious, non-conspiratorial answer is the simple one...he was still having an affair with Hunter even after his admission and the child is almost certainly his.
I'm the next act, waiting in the wings.. I'm an animal, trapped in your hot car... I am all the days you choose to ignore. You're all I need...you're all I need.. I'm in the middle of your picture.... Lying in the weeds....Radiohead, All I Need
Rielle Hunter is reportedly broke, living with a friend and seems to be biding her time. She could have written her own book and it would probably be a more interesting read than Elizabeth's. But Rielle Hunter seems to be thinking long term. Their affair was sexual but more; she loved Edwards. She's got a a baby to take care of.
The donor's money is gone and Rielle waits but Elizabeth Edwards will publish a book and write blog posts on DailyKos and make appearances on talk shows. We will watch and read, too. This is America and that's what happens and that's what we do. It's sex and lies and tragedy and politics and soap opera and probably some royalties will go to a good cause so we can all feel better. A little better, anyway.
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http://www.examiner.com/x-4793-DC-Marriage-Advice-Examiner~y2009m5d18-Kate-and-Jon-Elizabeth-Edwards-examples-of-the-complexities-of-forgiveness
Why do people always persecute the man for cheating? While I do not think it is necessarily right, look at some of these wives. There is a reason why some men cheat, like being in the public eye and if you left her you would be wrong. I'm sure Elizabeth isn't a joy to come home to. She seems extremely smug, spiteful, and self-centered. She pretends to care about the whole human race, but she will neither used her heatlh to get her husband to drop out of a Presidential race because if the truth came out, it would have sunk the Democrats, nor will she advise her husband to take the test and support an innocent child.
She is a narcissistic hyprocite. He is a husband who is in a loveless marriage, doing what husbands in loveless marriages which they cannot get out do. Only problem he got caught.
And if Elizabeth Edwards truly was resilient, she would (1) have gotten over this a year ago (and at which time she begged us for privacy, now she begs us to buy a book); (2) allow the name of the girlfriend to be mentioned (you can't be resilient or over a situation is you can't even verbalize it; and (3) protect her young children (instead of parading herself around as a victim, which she is not).
JUST STOP IT ! Let these children have some privacy, deal with this in Family Therapy and keep it QUIET. STOP hurting the innocent children.
Elizabeth needs to stop calling a toddler baby 'it.' That is vicious. Does she really think her children's half-sister won't become a part of their lives? Huh. (Although I'll note here that Paul McCartney paid child support for a Hamburg girl for many years. The girl looked EXACTLY him. But DNA tests eventually proved she wasn't his kid.)
Finally, what's up with her relationship that Elizabeth has 'no idea' if John is the baby's father? He's publically denied it, they've been through the death of a son, her cancer diagnosis, his spoiled presidential bid, a 30+ year marriage, revelations of the affair, her cancer reoccurence & apparent indication that it's terminal, lies about the affair ... and after all this she still can't trust him on a simple yes/no question? Just how slimy is this guy, REALLY?
For god's sake, that simple fact alone ought to bury this man's public career. (As far as the cheatin itself goes, I don't give a fig.) If he really does care about ordinary people living in poverty, then he can spend the rest of his days doin a bang-up job advocating for them.
One more thing--'begging for fidelity' at the altar is an excellent way to guarantee a solid mountain of lies if your man ever strays.
John Edwards could: work hard to repair his legal career to help ALL children, not just the ones he may or may not have fathered. Health care, insurance, child poverty, these are problems that are not solved yet.
Rielle could: just be a great mom and focus on the blessings of a healthy child. Live simply and leave the other family alone if that would bring peace to them.
Elizabeth Edwards could: accept and forgive. Really. Reach out to the "other woman" with forgiveness, compassion and love, not take her husband's sins "personally" and love the baby that her husband may have fathered, and stop calling the baby "it".
There is way too much vengeance, hostility, ulterior motives, and ambition in this story -- as there is in so much of American life. The Morality Police destroy lives and act with persecution. Really, is anyone here perfect? Jesus said -- let he who is without sin cast the first stone.
It is all very sad. It is especially sad for all the children involved.
Frankly, Lee, you sound like you're ticked off--like you were duped by your own need to believe a certain story, and now you're all sour grapes about it. That may not be your position, but it's certainly how I read your piece. The indignation is juvenile, and the pointing of your finger at Elizabeth for 'duping' Americans is absurd.
Sorry, but it's not Elizabeth being looked at for misappropriating funds--and no matter WHAT the shenanegins behind that misappropriation, *she* wasn't running for President. *She* didn't allegedly break the law.
The main issue is - at this time in history when the Media is all about Infotainment, It's galling that they would even think about running for President with this affair in their lives. It's only their business if they are
a non-public couple. It is truly an insult to anyone they asked for backing and money in the Campaign
when this was most assuredly going to come out. They jeopardized an Election and the Country's future
by tying to keep this secret. Can you imagine what would have happened if he actually got the nomination? He could have tanked the Democrats. He's Her problem and she almost let him be ours.
There's the real SHAME!
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I feel as though I'm watching a cheesy soap opera.
I personally can't understand the reasoning behind some of the actions, but I am not her and I was not there. Let's not forget that she was the one that was wronged here, and victim blaming is never productive.
And not that it is any of my business but I can't help wonder - if everything was over. If he was done with her, why was he still meeting her in hotel rooms. With the baby.
And sorry to say, Elizabeth writing the book does fairly open this up for discussion.