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Lisa Belkin

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Parents Whose Advice I'd Like To Hear

Posted: 12/23/2011 9:19 am

Nadya Suleman, who you probably know as the Octomom, is now getting paid to teach you how to be a good parent. That sums up so much of what is backwards in the world, doesn't it?

Why are all the WRONG people stepping up with advice?

Khloe Kardashian has a Mommy Blog. "Real Housewife" Alex McCord has written a book. ("This should be a book as to what not to do," one Amazon reviewer snarked, but, alas, McCord was serious.) At least Lynne Spears had the sense to scratch her book plans when her daughter Jamie Lyn (aka Britney's sister) had a baby at 16. (Perhaps Jamie Lyn can get her own parenting talk show next?) But still, she'd thought about it.

The Suleman announcement got me thinking. It's clear who should NOT be in this "let-me-tell-you-how-to-do-this" business. But who really should be adding their voices to the parenting conversation?

Here's who I'd like to hear from:

Steven Spielberg's Mother
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Leah Adler has given interviews describing her son's childhood, but I want more. Did little Steve watch movies when he should have been doing homework? Did he alienate his playmates (or make friends) by constantly shoving a camera in his face? What did his mother do that allowed her son to grow into an adult with a child like wonder at the world, but no drug habit?

Whose book or blog would YOU read? (And yes, you can name your own mother. Or not.)

 
Nadya Suleman, who you probably know as the Octomom, is now getting paid to teach you how to be a good parent. That sums up so much of what is backwards in the world, doesn't it? Why are all the W...
Nadya Suleman, who you probably know as the Octomom, is now getting paid to teach you how to be a good parent. That sums up so much of what is backwards in the world, doesn't it? Why are all the W...
 
 
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12:38 PM on 01/25/2012
The article says that Khloe Kardashian-Odom has a Mommy Blog. I found this weird since she doesn't have children but, upon clicking the link, discovered it's just a typo meant to read "Kourtney Kardashian" instead. Now I'm trying to figure out which visual is more disturbing.....
10:26 AM on 01/25/2012
Its Kourtney Kardashian, who is a mother, not Khloe Kardashian, who is not, who has a blog.
12:39 AM on 01/05/2012
It's funny how childhood memories come flooding back when you raise your own child. All I can do is glean from my parent's mistakes...and determine if they were even mistakes or is it just my perception. I try my best to limit media in the home...meaning as much as my daughter begs for a DS or to watch "just one more show" , I say "no" consistently. I believe electronics are a real creativity killer. Teach kindness and tolerance by modeling those traits because kids never stop watching what their parents say and do. And teaching them how to take care of themselves; it is always so sad when I meet a 12 year old that can't run an appliance, cook, clean or solve a problem. And last, never shake a child's confidence. At 37, I look at my peers and usually the only difference between happiness and misery is confidence. It towers over socio-economics, Ivy League degrees and even intuition.
11:42 AM on 01/04/2012
Good list! And I agree. The voices that speak loudest in our culture are rarely the ones you want to hear.

That said, I do agree with the commenters who say that sometimes it all seems like a crapshoot. My husband grew up poor with troubled friends, mostly horrible teachers and parents with addiction and mental health issues. He somehow made it to the Ivy League. He's smart, successful, well-liked by his colleagues and employees, upbeat, tolerant, patient and kind. His brother is a drug addict living on the street. I wish I could explain how that happens, but I can't.
12:23 PM on 01/01/2012
It's a good idea for a book, but just because these people turned out great & important and such, doesn't mean it was entirely the parents' doing. Sometimes the worst parents turn out the best kids and sometimes the best parents turn out the worst kids. My parents were amazing & 4 of us turned out amazing & one is a drug addict/alcoholic. It just depends---sometimes it is nature and sometimes nurture!!!
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rewith85man
10:27 PM on 12/27/2011
It is good to hear advice from parents whose children go through intense situations, experiences, etc. There were some good examples like mother of First Lady Michelle Obama, parents of late Steve Jobs and other founders, and so on.
10:05 PM on 12/27/2011
I understand, I have seeked parenting advice a couple time from my mother. However, being a parent is something that comes from experience. It is not something that is predictable in any way... unless you are a pyshic. Every child is different, just like every pregnancy is different. I hated taking advice from anyone when I was pregnant because it always turned out that my pregnancy was different then theirs. In fact, my second pregnancy (which I lost) was very different from my first... so had I of written down my own advice when I was pregnant with the first... I would have been wrong.

When you seek advice from anyone about anything you are only going to get what they have experienced themselves or what they have known other's to experience. Hey, you might get lucky and their advice may work; however, you might not and you may have to learn on your own.

My advice: do what you feel is right. I'm taking a Sociology class in college and through it I have learned that there are so many factors concerned in one's upbringing; and most don't include the way your parents raised you. So if you want to "raise the perfect child" take a Sociology class.
10:05 AM on 12/25/2011
Celebrities have nothing to say, nor do their parents. How about coming up with intelligent advice on your own rather than looking to strangers to put ideas in your head or words in your mouth?
WhatWhat1
Don't believe everything you think.
08:30 AM on 12/25/2011
Mary Gates was an incredible woman whose impact on hundreds of millions of people manifests through her son's choice in a mate and their deep desire the make the world a better place.
03:35 AM on 12/25/2011
I would take parenting tips from Chris Benoit before I took them from Michelle's mother
WhatWhat1
Don't believe everything you think.
08:39 AM on 12/25/2011
Is this the same old tired tripe coming from the right, or do you have some substance (or will you simply ignore this message?)
11:32 AM on 12/27/2011
Man...I was a huge Benoit fan before he off'd his family and himself.
03:22 PM on 01/12/2012
perhaps it was sarcasm at its best, and you didn't get the point..
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tedhices
I spell PC with the letters B and S
12:00 AM on 12/25/2011
My parents, they're stars in my eyes.
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rearlwriter
09:02 PM on 12/24/2011
Don't forget dads. Parenting is not only done by moms. I am grateful that I had two great parents who each taught me different lessons. And God bless the single parents who do it all!
06:54 PM on 12/24/2011
How about John McCain's mom, or VP Biden's mom, or Ellen Degenerous's mom, or Lisa Belkin's mom?
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Lisa Belkin
Life/Work/Family/Coffee
05:18 PM on 12/30/2011
Lisa Belkin's Mom would be more than delighted to give you any advice you might want!
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06:28 PM on 12/24/2011
Great post & great ideas ... This would be a wonderful book!

Happy Holidays ...
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kevinbr38
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06:03 PM on 12/24/2011
When I 'graduated' from elementary school, my mother wrote in my autograph book;
"Give to the world the best that you have, and the best will come back to you".
Happy Holidays everyone.
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07:37 PM on 12/24/2011
Your Mom sounds like a wonderful person...Happy Holodays back to you !!!
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Pupadup4oBama
08:36 AM on 12/25/2011
Happy Holidays to you, Kevin, and your awesome mom, wherever she may be.
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kevinbr38
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09:00 AM on 12/25/2011
Thank you:).