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Lisa Belkin

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Parenting Satire With Ring Of Truth

Posted: 10/31/2011 11:05 am

Humor works best when it contains a wide thread of truth. Sometimes, though, that makes it hard to tell the difference between real life and satire. This seems to be what happened with a short article in the Onion last week, which was widely quoted on Facebook and Twitter.

The original read:

SANTA ROSA, CA--A study released by the California Parenting Institute Tuesday shows that every style of parenting inevitably causes children to grow into profoundly unhappy adults. "Our research suggests that while overprotective parenting ultimately produces adults unprepared to contend with life's difficulties, highly permissive parenting leads to feelings of bitterness and isolation throughout adulthood," lead researcher Daniel Porter said. "And, interestingly, we found that anything between those two extremes is equally damaging, always resulting in an adult who suffers from some debilitating combination of unpreparedness and isolation. Despite great variance in parenting styles across populations, the end product is always the same: a profoundly flawed and joyless human being." The study did find, however, that adults often achieve temporary happiness when they have children of their own to perpetuate the cycle of human misery.

There was no such study -- that part is a joke -- but there really is a California Parenting Institute in Santa Rosa, and they report (for real) that their phone and email have been getting a workout since the piece appeared. The local newspaper in town, the Press Democrat, ran an article this weekend (for real) that quotes the group's executive director, Robin Bowen saying "We even had parent educators who work here say, 'When did we do a study?"

So many people appeared confused, that the Institute (the actual one) issued a press release that said "The falsified study quoted in The Onion states that all parenting styles lead to the same outcome -- unhappy, miserable adults. We have been around a long time because we know that parent education does work."

And who were some of these callers, to whom the conclusion rang true? One call, Bowen says, was from a woman who "said she was writing a book or something and she really wanted a copy of the research and it supported some ofher thoughts."

So, the study was a satire, but there really might be an author out there who believes that any which way you raise children will lead to an unhappy adulthood. Which would be depressing. If it weren't so funny.

Some days does it feel like everything you are doing is simply material for their therapist when they grow up? Talk to me. Tell me how that feels.

 
 
 
Humor works best when it contains a wide thread of truth. Sometimes, though, that makes it hard to tell the difference between real life and satire. This seems to be what happened with a short article...
Humor works best when it contains a wide thread of truth. Sometimes, though, that makes it hard to tell the difference between real life and satire. This seems to be what happened with a short article...
 
 
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07:05 PM on 11/02/2011
Parenting isn't perfect, nor is it designed to help your children lead a perfect life.

I teach my kids that there is learning in mistakes, light after the dark, and happiness in disappointment.

Maybe if society wasn't so centered on instant gratification, there wouldn't be as much disappointment.
07:13 PM on 11/01/2011
A great book to read: WHEN GROWN CHILDREN DISAPPOINT YOU, by Jane Adams, Ph.D. Situation: Parenting is an important part of the pie, but it is just ONE piece that goes into a kid. Friends, school districts, and even that part of a kid that isn't genetic, the part that makes him uniquely HIM...all these things play in.

IT IS NOT A PARENT'S FAULT. I don't actually know any parents who aren't the same kind of parent: DOING THE BEST THEY CAN. Some of us had better upbringings, better examples to follow, better instincts, less inclination to addiction or whatever. We need to remember

WE ARE ALL IN THE SAME CLUB. School districts and the school of psycology love to blame parents. "Daw... what did these parents do to cause this kid to be such a menance?" It's SO easy for the dinosaur to blame the mouse. and in turn...

THE MICE KEEP BLAMING EACH OTHER! Dudes, we all used to be on the same side! Remember the day when parents said to their kids, "The teacher is always right"??

We need to stick together, help each other, be able to correct each other's kids again. OUR KIDS ARE OUT OF HAND. LET'S UNITE.
06:25 PM on 11/01/2011
I'm just happy that I've lived to experience the adage: Grandchildren are the reward we get for not strangling our teenagers.
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06:11 PM on 11/01/2011
I gained much more security as a parent when I realized that it is my sacred motherly duty to give my son fodder for his future therapy. It's a dirty job, but someone's gotta do it.
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fgrammit
05:34 PM on 11/01/2011
TO DREAM THE IMPOSSIBLE DREAM OF EVERY PARENT IS TO SEE YOUR CHILD GROW UP LIKE YOU imagined THEY WOULD. IT REALLY IS NOT WHAT YOU TELL THEM TO DO SO MUCH AS WHAT THEY see you do . children are born mimics . But Teaching is NOT the same as Learning.
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hman570
04:40 PM on 11/01/2011
Let people bring up there own children and stop finding things that you don't like about how others do things and mind your own dam business!!!
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fgrammit
05:34 PM on 11/01/2011
agreed unless there is real imminent danger for the child .
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Sinnie
Failure is not falling down but refusing to get up
04:37 PM on 11/01/2011
Those who have no sense of humor will forever be at the mercy of those that do.
04:15 PM on 11/01/2011
I don't know what this says about parenting, but it tells me that The Onion continues to be a very funny publication that knows how to gently tweak our cherished opinions or ideas, especially those which turn out to be based on minimal or inconclusive factual support.
03:24 PM on 11/01/2011
I thought it was amusing but I actually possess an odd sense of humor. Irony and sarcasm however are lost on many. Some people can only be amused by something overt such as a gassy man, getting kicked in the crotch, while falling downstairs (as long as there is an abundance of expletives to accompany such hilarity). Who knew...
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surfandshop
"What we think, we become."
01:07 PM on 11/01/2011
This article is very funny. I could comment on the joyless days of raising children, how they never seem happy and how my identity is tied up in their success. But ; Noooooooo, i will not do so. It's all true and the Onion article hits on these stress points. HA HA HA
07:38 AM on 11/01/2011
معجب
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GOODDOC1
"civil war" is an oxymoron
05:43 PM on 11/01/2011
Ageeb, I've seen a few of your comments, but without translation I don't know what to think. I'd really like to know your opinion. Could you help me out please. (I understand if your computer doesn't print in English, though.)
02:11 PM on 11/02/2011
His comment, if Google Translate is to be trusted, is "Fan"

http://translate.google.com/#auto|en|%D9%85%D8%B9%D8%AC%D8%A8%20
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David Balmer
02:14 AM on 11/01/2011
Good Morning from Switzerland! This is the truth, I lived in Santa Rosa while studying classical ballet at the junior college back in the 80s. Now I have 6 children (all born here in CH) and as a parent, I can tell you that it is not easy. But..the answer to all of our parenting problems can be found in the FAMILY BALLET WORKOUT. Make those kids put on tights (and the boys get a dance belt to squeeze those jewels together) if they can get used to this routine, with stretching etc., then all problems will disappear.
Do you believe this? Some of it is true, really. Do the splits hard enough and you have the NUTCRACKER...if you are a woman, then it is the ONION cracker. Either way the pain makes all other social problems within the family go away.
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Coasterr
Tolerance + Education + Technology = Peace
12:09 AM on 11/01/2011
"The study did find, however, that adults often achieve temporary happiness when they have children of their own to perpetuate the cycle of human misery."

It's so true I have seen it countless times. People think babies will save their miserable lives or their pathetic marriage based on a sham. But those people are illequipped to raise and foster a child that will understand the hardships of life and be able to cope with it. I see mothers extremely happy when they are pregnant, then once the postpartum depression starts its all downhill from there. Then the mother spends the next 18 years juggling with keeping herself happy and raising her kids, sadly the former typically takes priority leaving the kids grow up without the necessary coping skills to succeed in life. Then the kids have sex in order to escape from reality and then they have sex so much they eventually get pregnant repeating the cycle.
11:26 PM on 10/31/2011
My favorite was the day when I encountered a foreign exchange student from Asia looking absolutely horrified with a copy of The Onion with a headline which read, "Entire Country of Mexico Killed in Drug Deal,". I definitely had to struggle to wipe the smile off my face when I informed him that the paper was not true :D
tonybfine
fractional reserve lending is counterfeiting
10:07 PM on 10/31/2011
Kids are such incredibly spontaneously joyous creatures, I wouldn't be surprised if a real study found this. What do we do to them trying to make them fit in to our society? The Onion cracks me up with its straight faced articles with such shocking stuff in them.