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Why Friendship With Women Is Important

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By Kristin Salaky

Originally posted on Literally, Darling


Throughout childhood and adolescence, we all heard it. Most of us still hear it.

"I'm a guy's girl."

"Girls are too much drama."

"I'm not like most girls."

These are seemingly silly, offhand comments that I never took much to heart until recently. Then, I sat and thought about what these women were actually saying.

In the worst case, they are actually buying into the stereotype that the media has for us that we are all one-dimensional, catty, drama-adoring, celebrity-obsessed Barbie dolls. In the best case, they are still disregarding an entire gender's worth and friendship value.

Maybe it's just because I've been blessed enough to be surrounded by strong, amazing women, but I haven't a bloody clue what any of these ladies are talking about.

Most of the women I've encountered are not these crazy characters we see in movies or TV. They're much more like the Michelle Obamas of the world than the Regina Georges.

When speaking with my female colleagues, roommates and best friends, I don't see drama-inducing witches; I see my role models, I see future leaders and I see compassion. I see the women who have held my hand through tough breakups and have laughed with me when I've mercilessly burnt brownies.

Don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with being friends with men. Hell, some of my dearest friends are men or identify as male. But, I don't choose them as friends because of some perceived notion that I must feel entitled by choosing friends who are men. I choose them as I would anyone else -- for who they are. I don't understand where this idea even came from that being friends with solely men was some badge of honor.

Why in the world would you want to distance yourself from a subsection of people that have made amazing strides? If you're not like most women, I'm sorry, because most women are the absolute bee's knees.

If we're not there to support each other, the world is going to be a pretty sad place. I think that's why when women attack other women, whether in the media or in my own personal experience, I get really sad. We have enough forces working against us and our success, why add to it?

If you don't see how amazing a bond with other women is and you aren't a friend to women, I feel sad for you. Perhaps think twice before writing off a gender of "drama hoarders," because you may make the best friends you've ever had.

Literally, Darling is an online magazine by and for twenty-something women, which features the personal, provocative, awkward, pop-filled and pressing issues of our gender and generation. This is an exact representation of our exaggerated selves.