I'm going to Los Angeles this weekend to meet my man's parents for the first time. I'm really excited to get to know the people who created this extraordinary creature I love so much, and it feels super special to have been invited to accompany him on the journey. So romantical!
At any rate, I figured that because I'm spun out all giddy-like on matters of the heart at the moment, it would be the perfect time for the second round of my ongoing interview series about love and relationships, "Queer Celebrities Need Love, Too." For this edition I reached out to Imperial Teen's Will Schwartz, original Hole drummer Patty Schemel, TV personality Philip Tetro (from MTV Canada's 1 Girl 5 Gays), transgender comedian Ian Harvie, New York Times bestselling author (and Madonna's brother) Christopher G. Ciccone, actor PJ DeBoy, radio talkshow host (and former Playgirl president) Daniel Nardicio, and Sexpop god Mario Diaz. They all weighed in on the same five questions:
1. If you had to sum up the entire history of your love life in one word, what would it be?
2. What's your favorite on-screen romance of all time? What was it about their love that you liked?
3. Name something that's a deal breaker for you in relationships.
4. What does a perfect day look like to you? Is it spent alone or with someone else?
5. If you could pick a theme song for that day, what would it be?
Here's what they had to say about stuff (and things).
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2. Gena Rowlands and Peter Falk in A Woman Under the Influence comes to mind (their relationship in the first half of the film, anyway). She's pretty crazy and inappropriate, but they share a deep and complicated sense of love and understanding of one another for a while. It doesn't end so great, but it's a powerful unconditional love message until things really go awry. I like Dudley and Liza in Arthur, also. I like that they're goofballs and everything is absurd and funny to them, and they have their flaws but they accept one another. I mean it's a bit cartoonish and codependent, but what isn't?
3. No drive, terrible breath.
4. Oh, so many ways. Spent with someone else! Having had some really good news the night before (i.e., a song licensed, a Grammy nod), sleep in a beautiful luxury hotel with a best buddy, take a bath, eat a delicious breakfast, lay out by the pool and read trashy magazines, do a little exercise and some spa time, take a nap, get up and watch a little TV, go to an incredible restaurant for dinner, come back and watch a good movie. Or a similar day at a friend's house in Joshua Tree or Valley Center, eating great food, hanging out with irreverent grandmas and dogs, cracking up all day with my pals, and doing home karaoke at night. Or writing and hanging out with Imperial Teen, Roddy cooking us dinner.
5. The Alessi Brothers' "Seabird":
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Patty was the original drummer behind Courtney Love in the band Hole and is the subject of a new documentary titled Hit So Hard: The Life and Near Death Story of Patty Schemel (watch the trailer exclusively on iTunes here).
2. Beauty & the Beast, Jean Cocteau. His love was pure, and she was eventually able to look past his beastliness, which made him human in the end.
3. Dishonesty or no sense of humor.
4. Spent with my wife and daughter. It doesn't matter what we do, as long as we are together!
5. Edward Sharp & the Magnetic Zeros' "Home":
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2. Juan and Eva Peron (Jonathan Pryce and Madonna) in Evita: the story of a woman who encounters endless heartbreak her entire life until someone finally loves her back. She finds true love while trying to change the world for the better. She searches and searches for love until she finds more than she knows what to do with. Then she dies.
3. Men who aren't articulate! You don't have to be a genius, but if you say that you "seen" something as opposed to "saw" something, you will need to leave. Immediately.
4. A perfect day for me happens sometime in July: friends, family, food, music, and dancing. A handsome man by my side would be great, too. And, perhaps, a drink or two. Or three.
5. Madonna's "Holiday":
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Ian is a transgender comedian/activist who has performed his act all over the world and on both mainstream and queer TV. (Watch him do his thing on tour with Margaret Cho here.)
1. You can't just give me one word! I gotta have two or three for this: "sweet, semi-complicated, passion."
2. Love Actually. I'm a complete sap for a film with multiple "love" storylines. This film shows love from so many different angles: that of a kid's first love, love lost, love not reciprocated, love even with a language barrier, forbidden love, awkward new love, and so much more. I like how they're all tied together in the end. I love the ending at the airport with everyone greeting each other at the gate. I'm a huge sap!
3. Unfair fighting -- and this goes for any kind of relationship in my life: lover, friend, family. We can have a beef, but you'd better come at me with some adult fightin' tools. No serious name calling, stick to the issues, and we'd better fuck after. Well, I guess the fucking doesn't apply to family; we should just probably hug it out after.
4. Spent with m'ady: wake up to a blow job, go for a walk/mild hike or paddle boarding (which I've have yet to do), get a kale salad at the Veggie Grill, meet friend(s) for coffee, cook out at home, watch Chelsea Lately, go to bed. Kind of a simpleton here.
5. The Temper Trap's "Sweet Disposition":
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2. From the movie Laura: the lead, Dana Andrews, falls in love with the other lead, Gene Tierney. He falls in love with a dead woman based solely on a portrait, her affects, and the stories people tell him about her; then he discovers she is alive! It's a trip, and it's brilliant.
3. No sense of humor.
4. A cold, cloudy Sunday, laying around warm in bed with someone I love, ignoring The New York Times, watching old movies, eating pizza, drinking wine...
5. Alicia Keys' "If I Ain't Got You":
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You probably remember PJ from his role in John Cameron Mitchell's masterpiece film Shortbus. He is also a regular on OutTV and the Here network.
2. Hal Ashby's Harold and Maude. Bud Cort and Ruth Gordon play such beautiful oddballs who find each other at a desperate point in each other's lives. There's this delightful, optimistic doom that draws me to them. We know it's not going to work out, but in the meantime...
3. I don't do deal breakers.
4. My perfect day is outside somewhere with Paul (my partner) and as many family and friends as I can gather. There should be a river involved, too. I'm very fortunate to have the people in my life that I do. You all know who you are! Thank you for all the perfect days and the not-so-great ones, too.
5. Massive Attack's "Protection":
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Daniel is a New York City nightlife heavyweight, media mogul, TV talking head, and radio personality. He made Sarah Palin totally shit her pants a while back, too... which makes me smile.
2. They werent actually lovers, but Holly Hunter and Albert Brooks in Broadcast News were best friends with an underlying romance. I just loved their rapport and the way they could finish each others thoughts -- very sweet.
3. Lack of humor. Chris and I literally laugh all day long. It gets us through the tough times, realizing the absurdity of it all. I've gone out with guys who weren't funny, and it's like the worst quality ever.
4. I like being alone. I guess the perfect day would be working doing what i love, then when I'm done achieving, Chris comes home, and we talk about the day.
5. Polyphonic Spree's "Light and Day":
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1. I'm gonna go with "abundance." If I look back at all the love that has been given to me, I'm a damn lucky guy.
2. I was always especially touched by King Kong (wait... that sounded weird). The deep love between Kong and Jessica Lange's character brought me to tears. There's something about the tragedy of an unrequited love that's always moving. I usually play the big trouble-causing ape in my relationships.
3. I can no longer deal with guys who try and fight for power in my relationships. I don't want to compete with my dates. If I wanted a serious relationship, I would like one where we try to empower each other, one where we would aspire to build the other up, not break them down because of insecurities. I know I'm not the easiest person to date, especially in my line of work. I'm surrounded by talent and sexiness, so it takes a strong individual to be able to handle me. The point is I can be a real pain in the ass, but I'm super lovable... what?
4. The perfect day for me would be brunch with my framily (friends/family), then we're off to rehearse a new ridiculous show we're doing. We would then take a thrift store shopping break, but I'd have to ditch them to make my dance class at the Sweat Spot. The day ends with a big fat bowl in bed watching bad TV. Yeah... that's about right. Love comes in many forms, and each person can give us something different and valid. For me, my friends are more than enough. Anything more is gravy... but I do like gravy a lot.
5. Bill Withers' "Lovely Day":
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