Feminism's Barack-star Makeover at the California Oprah Rally

When I was a UCLA undergrad, I used to drive home to San Diego on weekends to visit my parents, where they would be promptly subjected to my hour-long soliloquies on the hypocrisy of the American Dream. After my Women's Studies, African-American Politics and Public Policy in Minority Communities courses, I was positively engaged in our nation's equality principles and absolutely negative about my generation's capacity for civic responsibility. Were we non-voters always going to gripe for hours in the dorm hallways, bitterly re-hashing the concepts of "privilege" and the "hegemony" before blowing it all off to hit Pauley Pavillion and get drunk and rowdy at the next men's hoops game?

Years have passed since I was on the floor of that storied gymnasium watching Baron Davis dribble circles around the Stanford defenders to pound a slam dunk. As the daughter of a football coach, there's nothing I love more than a good sports analogy, and on Superbowl Sunday -- with Oprah, Caroline Kennedy, Michelle Obama and Maria Shriver exuding poise and commanding authority from center stage -- I noted that this Empowered Woman Dream Team had actually managed to outshine even the championship performances of the great John Wooden himself.

Spitting passion in pretty dresses and polished lips, these women were regal knockouts. In the election that should have represented our comeuppance, Hillary finally rewarded for the sacrifice to raise Chelsea and support a (dashingly handsome, illogically loveable, brilliant) cheating husband, I was unnerved when I realized I was crying because the women-behind-the-men had shaken my heart. For an Obama die-hard, I have unbearable HRC guilt. But when Oprah asserted that we are now officially free, jointly celebrating the victory of the Womens and Civil Rights movements, she enumerated the many reasons why I believe Barack is the right person for the job.

Besides, can you really argue that these fiery femmes are behind their husbands?

As a confused member of the generation of women who inherited our mother's You-Can-Have-It-All feminism and watching the speakers own their various matron-professional-wife identities, I was compelled to feel that the Great Lie was in fact real and attainable. On stage you can't see the nervous breakdowns, Blackberries, nannies, housekeepers, therapists and friendship networks it takes to keep it all together. You just see the badass woman, and you can only hope she's not a blurry oasis in the desert.

Every wine-spilling Wednesday night with my girlfriends ends in nearly teary-eyed frustration, asking each other: Can an ambitious woman really achieve a career, family and supportive, loving partnership? And lately, if we let Hillary pass us by, have we conceded to that unyielding "good" female quality of compromise? If men come first and roll over, will it ever be our turn?

Michelle Obama stood about 50 yards in front of me, oozing Jackie Kennedy and physically shaking with the ferocity of her message. My mind flashed to a moment on the campaign trail in Iowa that had made me smile, when Barack joked about how he couldn't succeed without her and then he referred to her as "The Closer." Maybe this truly is the post-inequality era Oprah declared and it's time to embrace it. Maybe we got it wrong the first time around and we are really just now electing the nation's first legitimate Power Couple.

The crowd's chants of "Yes We Can!" drowning in my ears seemed like an inherent answer.

Comments

[ChipDouglas]

Are we truly "free" if, behind-the-scenes, we require Blackberries, nannies, housekeepers, therapists, and endure nervous breakdowns? Why do we feel the need to spread ourselves so thin and require success with every facet of our lives? Makes me think about what we truly value. Is all of that success worth while and capable of being enjoyed in you"re spending 3 days a week in therapy and don"t have time to spend with your friends or family? Every person, regardless of race or gender, should have the opportunity to "have it all", but what does that mean and at what price is it worth it?

[LeoMarvin]

"Besides, can you really argue that these fiery femmes are behind their husbands?"

I think you mean "dispute," not "argue."

[KaAp]

A friend called me from California about the rally she begged me to turn it on ... I am not an Oprah Winfrey fan ... never liked the whole talk show confessional format ... but oh my I was moved totally completely and in a way that sent chills up my spine ... then after listening to Michelle Obama ... I cried ... my husband cried tears of joy ... wow how wonderful ... this was the most moving and profound of all the rallies I have heard this campaign season ...

[1dogs2]

I'm a 65-year-old professional woman and a third-generation feminist. My beloved grandmother (who was also a professional woman) told me when I was 10 that I could be and do anything I wanted, provided I was twice as good at it as the men I was competing with. I recall the amazement in her voice when she told me that women won the right to vote when she was in her 30s. My mother bumped her head on a glass ceiling that was lower then. I've had several concussions of my own.

My generation of women did not get it quite right.
The fact is that no one can "have it all." Everyone has to make choices and choices have consequences. Some of mine consisted of supporting my husband's ambitions; many involved opting for what I perceived as my child's best interests. I don't regret any of my choices or pretend that they were not mine or confuse such factors as economic and demographic forces with sexism.

Hilary Clinton made choices in her life. Women of our generation may not have fully recognized what the consequences of our early choices, such as marriage and child-bearing, would be, but that does not excuse us from owning those choices. It is clear to me is that Michelle Obabma is very aware of the consequences of the choices she has made. But because the causes and ambitions of the Obamas are very different from those of the Clintons, I suspect that in the long run, her choices will prove to be the better model for women still struggling with these issues, and that she will have fewer regrets at the end of day than Senator Clinton, regardless of how her choices play out over her lifetime.

[MyThought]

I get moved by good books on thoughts, poetry and movies.

I don't let celebrities decide for me. The hype is way over the top.

Time to settle down and start thinking on your own.

Oprah markets - don't you see that? Why do you think she has celebrities come to the opening of her school in Africa. Why is it that everything she does is pumped up. Why do you think she's so rich - marketing folks - she's good at it. The overkill and the suckers that fall for it.

Frightenging.

[theuniversal]

Yeah, that was really moving stuff. I can't imagine how cynical a person would have to be to not be moved listening to her.

[exoevolution]

Michelle's speech was moving beyond belief. She is amazing! We need to see & hear more from her. Where can we get a transcript of her LA speech??? I want to pass it on to family & friends.

[NatashaSmall]

Great post! Thanks for drawing attention to Michelle Obama.

[ac1]

Seems to me, she's been trying to change things her whole life. Too bad she didn't come up with the slogan first. Clinton'92 did.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=foZ0p8Wzegw

[ac1]

Is this about a feel-good moment? How much is inspiration rather than investigation? Where is the level of scrutiny and questioning of Obama's record and political co-horts and maneuvering, compared with what Clinton undergoes daily, as she should? Trust his excuses, but not Hillary's?

[ac1]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=foZ0p8Wzegw

[Ides]

Not to sound like an unnecessary revolutionary (especially being a man), but it is not beyond the realm of familiarity to see identity politics played to keep those with power in power. (This was the Hallmark of the Civil War and the driving force behind George W. Bush's 2 campaigns against the infidels and the brown people.)

To this I say, "Congratulations, you're free to be a woman, but that doesn't make you FREE." There are a great many forces arrayed to prevent PEOPLE, regardless of race and gender, from succeeding, as well as hindering people BECAUSE of their race and gender. But these are two different things.

Now, at this point, feeling guilty for not voting for Hillary Clinton but not feeling guilty for not voting for a better candidate four years ago in Carol Moseley Braun isn't about betrayal, it kind of reeks of acquiescence to nepotism.

[ac1]

Post-inequality, post-partisan? What country do you live in? It amazes me that Obama's clear intimations that his supporters would not rally around Hillary if she is the nomination is the height of hypocrisy. If all these energized folks truly care about the vision and unity of this country, and the policies that Obama and Hillary share, then he should be outright encouraging them to stay engaged in the process, rather than giving us more of his not-so-subtly divisive rhetoric - or is it really all about him? Why does it end, if he truly cares and is really invested in bringing new voters out, if he is not the nominee? Not much different than encouraging the Hillary-hating that's going on, which, if he is who he claims, he should be above.

Why are all these women fighting for universal health care suddenly bailing- now it's a bad idea? Rockstar pep rallies are nice, but at the end of the day, it means little. Let's not delude ourselves that this hype-filled politicking masked as inspiration is anything other than the usual.

http://fish.blogs.nytimes.com/2008/02/03/all-you-need-is-hate/index.html?ref=opinion

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[Hopalongpoppyseed]

Yes, I caught the rally on C-Span while I was putzing around the kitchen and man that Michelle Obama moved me. She didn't just stand by her man. She cleared a path for him. Oh, she is not to be messed with. It's been long overdue for somebody to tell it like it is.

[TAHARQA]

i saw that rally on c-span. They were amazing