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Mara Shapshay

Entries by Mara Shapshay

What Others Think About You Is None Of Your Business

(0) Comments | Posted June 24, 2016 | 12:02 PM

One of the greatest things I learned in recovery is that it is none of my business what others think about me. Now, in theory not caring what others think is easy but putting it into practice is hard. Let's just say I fall short on many occasions.


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Do You Live to Work?

(0) Comments | Posted May 17, 2016 | 3:58 PM

Workaholics, we all know them and we secretly want to ring their necks. These work-obsessed people are our fathers, our sisters, our husbands, our bosses or even ourselves. What is a workaholic, you ask? Well, Barbara Killinger, PhD explained it best, "I define a workaholic as a work-obsessed individual who...

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Are You a Supreme Judge in the Court of Life?

(0) Comments | Posted March 23, 2016 | 2:43 PM

Judging another human being, situation or ourselves is something we all do. I'm not immune. I judge myself for watching The Bachelor then I judge all the women on the show... Are those boobs real? She looks like a hooker. Did that chick actually say her career is being a...

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The Difference Between Faith and Trust

(3) Comments | Posted February 19, 2016 | 10:22 AM

I want to preface this blog post by saying that I don't consider myself a religious person, but I definitely consider myself a spiritual being. I've been in recovery for close to 11 years now, and in recovery it is important to turn your will and life over to a...

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Are You Aging Like a Fine Whine? How to Stop Obsessing About Your Age

(0) Comments | Posted February 1, 2016 | 10:13 PM

I don't know what it is recently, but I've been noticing that everyone around me seems to be obsessed about their age, and I'm getting really sick of it! We as a culture are way too concentrated on youth and staying young.

I have a friend who is 29...

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It Ain't Personal: 7 Ways to Stop Taking Things So Damn Personally

(0) Comments | Posted January 21, 2016 | 3:51 PM

I'm a very sensitive gal and have really worked hard at not taking things personally. It's easier said than done, though. When my husband was going through his winter "funk" he was irritable and snapping at me. I started to get resentful; how could he treat me this way? I...

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How to Win a Nobel Peace Prize Every Day

(0) Comments | Posted November 16, 2015 | 10:13 AM

Most of us think that we could never be like the Dalai Lama or come even close to winning a Nobel Peace Prize. Well, let's be honest -- we're probably not going to become the spiritual leader of Tibet or win that illustrious prize, BUT who says we can't be...

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Are You 'Shoulding' on Yourself?

(0) Comments | Posted November 2, 2015 | 2:40 PM

I "should" on myself quite frequently, and it's always a messy experience. All of the constant "shoulding" is soiling my soul and putting too much unnecessary pressure on myself, which, in turn, causes a great amount of suffering.

In my opinion, the "shoulds" ought to come in categories. The...

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Are You a Perpetual Victim? 7 Ways to Stop Speaking Victimese

(3) Comments | Posted October 13, 2015 | 3:46 PM

There are two languages I speak fluently: English and victimese. I seriously feel victimized in L.A. traffic or when Starbucks runs out of my Strawberry Acai Refresher mix. It's a real self-centered way to live. Things don't JUST happen... they happen to ME! I'm the victim of life's ill fortunes.

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Living in the Grey -- 7 Steps to Get Out of Negative Thinking

(1) Comments | Posted October 1, 2015 | 11:28 AM

I've been a negative thinker since I could think. My earliest memory is of me and my father in Sweden when I was a mere baby. Everyone is Sweden is blonde and blue-eyed and I have dark hair, dark eyes and pale skin. I stood out. A woman at the...

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The Dalai Lama's 80th Birthday Celebration - Protestors, D-List Celebrities and Compassion

(1) Comments | Posted July 7, 2015 | 1:20 PM

This past Sunday my husband and I ventured to the Honda Center in Anaheim, California for the Dalai Lama's 80th Birthday celebration. The Dalai Lama holds a special place in my heart because it was just a few years ago that my father and I were visiting San Diego. When...

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The Women of Light in CIW Prison

(0) Comments | Posted November 26, 2014 | 12:34 PM

"Every single letter of the alphabet is needed to have a kosher Torah. If any letter is missing then the Torah is not kosher. This means that any member of our community that is missing (incarcerated) must be returned in order for the community to be whole," My friend and...

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The Most Vulnerable Kids In L.A. County

(5) Comments | Posted November 11, 2014 | 5:26 PM

On November 1, 2014 the most vulnerable kids in L.A. County became the most invulnerable as they stepped into the spotlight thanks to "Kids in the Spotlight" charity event.

"It was upsetting to watch but I'm very happy to share my story. It shows you that anything is possible," said...

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The Honeymoon Lingerie That Outlasted My Marriage

(1) Comments | Posted May 14, 2014 | 12:49 PM

It was 2001 and I was at this high-end shopping mall in Los Angeles called The Beverly Center. On the first floor was this really snooty lingerie store, the kind of place that only hires size two models.

"I'm getting married and I need something really slutty but classy." I...

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Marianne Williamson for Congress: Will It Take a Miracle For Her To Win?

(3) Comments | Posted May 2, 2014 | 3:18 PM

The definition of a miracle is when the seemingly impossible becomes possible. One could say it was a miracle that Henry Waxman decided to retire thus making Marianne Williamson a much stronger contender for his vacated 33rd District congressional seat.

Marianne Williamson knows a thing or two about miracles...

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My Divorce Made Me The Black Sheep

(11) Comments | Posted December 7, 2012 | 12:55 PM

My divorce made me the black sheep of my family. The million-dollar question is: Can I ever turn white or wear white again?

This popped into my head as my boyfriend recently got down on one knee and you guessed it, asked for my hand in marriage. There he...

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Do It For The Kids

(51) Comments | Posted May 23, 2012 | 7:40 PM

This past Sunday, my stomach bungee jumped to my ankles when I watched this beautiful, young mother with her doting husband and their cherubic baby as they ate eggs benedict at brunch. Fine, I'm envious -- I always wanted my own Nicholas Sparks Sunday brunching scene, but that was not...

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How Many Divorcees Does It Take To Change A Lightbulb?

(74) Comments | Posted January 17, 2012 | 6:25 PM

My ex-husband handled our finances, the car maintenance and basically everything manly around the house -- from un-clogging the toilets to changing light bulbs. I did the laundry, cooked and cleaned... well let's be honest there was a lot of take-out and I'm not very adept with Pine-Sol and a...

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The Homeless Serving The Homeless

(8) Comments | Posted November 23, 2011 | 2:30 AM

My first Thanksgiving after my divorce I thought was going to be my most awful ever but it was actually my greatest. It really put the "thanks" in Thanksgiving and made me grateful for what little I had at the time.

I think we've all had those times where the...

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The Jokes On Me

(294) Comments | Posted November 19, 2011 | 9:00 AM

Christopher Hitchens wrote an article in Vanity Fair in 2007 entitled, "Why Women Aren't Funny." He stated that it's the man's job to be funny and the woman's job to be pretty. He talked about men not wanting to be with a comedic lady because, "they want women as an...

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