What Family Values? The Real Reason America Is Falling Behind the Rest of the World
I stumbled across a frightening little list this morning. It's a list of the only four countries in the world that don't offer guaranteed paid maternity leave for mothers (based on a Harvard/McGill University study of 173 countries). You might expect to see Liberia, Papua New Guinea, and Swaziland on the list. But...the United States? Of America? As I so often find myself asking these days -- what's wrong with us?
While we in the U.S. do have the legal right to up to 12 weeks of unpaid "family leave" -- honestly, who can afford that? And the consequences go way beyond those 12 weeks. We know that women who don't have paid leave are less likely to breastfeed their infants. And we know that the first few weeks of breastfeeding are the most critical to a child's lifelong health.
Part of the dilemma is that we let ourselves get distracted from this critical issue. We allow misguided religious leaders and politicians to goad us into to fomenting and focusing almost exclusively on hot-button issues from abortion to gay marriage. Meanwhile, we leave women who do choose life to struggle, and their children to suffer.
We rail against the threats of socialism and higher taxes, and turn our cameras on the hot air parade of all the reasons why we can't have health care for all people. Meanwhile, other countries just quietly, efficiently, and democratically take care of all their people and wonder what our problem is.
Come on America! What happened to our pride, our sense of responsibility? We think we have to solve all the world's problems when we aren't even taking good care of ourselves. I think it's time for a new definition of family values in this country:
New Family Values: People should take the best care of each other, no matter what the cost, simply because it's the right, moral thing to do. Men and women of all races and sexual proclivities should be treated equally, with respect and nonviolence. Children should be nurtured, protected, and educated to care for others and the planet. The government should look out for its people and protect them, and require businesses to do the same. It's simple, really.
When will we learn?
For more from Maria Rodale, go to http://www.mariasfarmcountrykitchen.com.
Loading comments…
Want to reply to a comment? Hint: Click "Reply" at the bottom of the comment; after being approved your comment will appear directly underneath the comment you replied to
I agree with your post, Maria. Sadly, it seems we aren't ever going to learn. This country seems to have lost its sense of 'for the common good' long ago. Maybe I'm just a pessimist. This isn't a 'childless vs. parents' employment issue, a "lifestyle choice" issue, or an overpopulation/energy consumption issue; it's about basic humanity.
Men and women should be treated equally.....but no mention of paternity leave ?
I gotta ask the question: why as a matter of public policy, if arguably overpopulation is the cause of so many of the evils in this world today, should we do anything, from tax breaks to maternity leave, that encourages people to have children? Other than our social security checks? Many HuffPo commenters believe that oil consumption is a big problem but I don't see any of them calling for tax incentives or time off to use more gas.
You do realize that with out people having children you don't have people to take care of you when you're old or workers to pay into the social security system that will subsidize your least productive years. Economically children are a better investment than elderly. If we want to combat over population maybe we should be encouraging childbearing while reducing the amount of investment in a population that has outlived their potential.
Not only does the country I live in have paid maternity leave (2 months prior and 3 months after the birth), but they also give you an extra 2 weeks vacation when you get married...cool, eh? Also, you can take even more time off (up to 6 months) after the birth of your child and still receive 30% of your pay. Woman are allowed by law (as in companies have to let them) to go home to breastfeed their child during the workday as well. We also have a paternity leave policy, which I believe is 3 months at 80% pay. I am so glad I will be having my children here instead of in my home country.
I am in total agreement, Maria..............greed has consumed the brains and spirits of so many that we have allowed to herd us around like cows................They need to get out !!
Require business to do the same?
Excuse me. But, that's not how it works in most of those other countries.
In most of those other countries you mention it is the government that pays for that leave - at a different rate than the individual's normal pay rate. Such re-imbursement is paid out of the "universal" healthcare plan on the premise it is good for child, mother and society.
Most of those other countries also have required vacations that are two to three times greater than what is common in the U.S. And, they have have strict rules about layoffs and firing people - in some cases they require many months of notice before an employer can terminate employees. There are lots of differences in those societies - they have made significant progress towards treating all their people with respect.
Do not cherry-pick a single, incorrect point and try to pass it on to businesses as a requirement that fits your particular need. If you wish to accomplish something like this, try to do it within a greater system in which society takes responsiblity for the citizens. The U.S. is far behind on this point - just visit any American city and witness the thousands of homeless on the street.
Single payer health insurance first. And has anyone checked the tax rates in the countries that offer? Thats the problem here, no one wants to pay extra txes for these things.
And one more thing - I am tired, as a single person, of picking up the slack at work for people who choose to have children. I have np problem with parents getting the leave, however we who don't have kids should have the same time off for other things.
You act like having a baby is like sipping margaritas in Cancuun.
Its a good thing that none of those children will grow up to be workers that pay into a social security system that will subsidize your later years . . . oh . . wait.
Ultimately, the trouble is that you can foist just about anything on people--no matter how unnatural, unpleasant, and onerous--and convince them that it's "right". Folks have to stop knuckling under; they have to ask questions, stick up for themselves, and realize that they deserve better than what they're getting.
and this is supposed to be the best and greatest country in the whole world, right? where i come from, 12 weeks maternity leave, with full payment and to add icing on the cake, culturally the woman is confined with her baby. they do not leave the house, and they do not do anything like cook, and are taken care of so that they may recover their bodies and mind, and that is in a third world country, botswana, africa for that matter.
i hope as America reaches the tenets of civilisation, it will think more about women and maternity leave!!
and I forgot to mention "entertaining" all the relatives and other people who want to stop by and see the baby.
Whew.
It's no vacation!
I've had three kids and let me tell you, the first 12 weeks are no vacation! Here's what it's like: No sleep for more than three hours in a row. For the mom, physical pain of recovery (I've had both vaginal and c-sections and they both hurt like hell!). Severe nipple and breast pain until the breasts and nipples adjust to being food sources. Fatigue. Crankiness. World rocking change.
For GOOD fathers, it involves doing a lot of work around the house that normally mom's do. Hours of walking and rocking a crying baby while mom tries to sleep. And also keeping other kids fed, healthy and put to bed at a reasonable hour.
All this, of course, accompanied by an intense wave of universal love so strong that it makes you suddenly want to save the world and heal the planet and defend and protect all children and all mothers everywhere.
Amen. Amen and amen. In addition, I would also like to see employers be kinder and gentler to mothers who need to breast pump at work. I chose to go to formula, but I work with mothers who pump and they're not allowed to pump when they need to...they have to do it on their designated planning/lunch period (you would think elementary school administrators would be more understanding, but nope--not in my world).
It smacks of chauvinism, all of it.
I LOVE Maria! I could not have said it better myself. I agree 100%. I am a working women that does not have nor plan to have children, but America's policy on maternity leave has always frustrated me beyond words. I am posting this article to my Facebook and sharing Maria's meaningful words.
Just one of the things we lack when compared to the rest of the industrialized world. Healthcare and paid vacation days. The US is a sweatshop. The best one can hope for is a union job (going fast) or work for oneself and call the shots.
Don't hold your breath thinking things will change.
I want equality in the workplace. I think parents should have the same amount of paid time off as those who are not parents.
THANK YOU!!!
We are not talking about vacation days here. I am single with no children, but I would happily let my co-worker, that just gave birth, have the option to stay home and care for her infant (and not have to worry about losing her job or income). It will benefit all of society in the long run.
I used to feel like you did...until I became a parent.
I do remember thinking: "Wow, this is such a baby culture country" before I became a parent and kind of rolling my eyes at some of it. And surely there are people who abuse the system, just because they can. But once you're walking in someone else's shoes for a bit, you get it.
So please know: it's not that most parents are asking for special treatment, it's that taking care of small children requires it. Little kids get sick...how can a 9 month old baby or a 2 year old toddler take care of him/herself? To stay healthy, babies have to have frequent checkups...and that's not including the times you need to rush them in last minute because something crazy is going on with them health-wise.
In addition, most daycares won't take kids until they're at least 6 weeks old. Which is really, really tiny.
I had an adequate maternity leave situation through my employer, but I still wish I could have spent at least 12 full weeks with her before going back to work. Unfortunately, I spent 4 of my 6 weeks paid leave on medical bedrest which only left me with 8, 6 of which were unpaid. We had we have bills to pay and I can't afford to quit my job. It's simply how it is for people who choose to have child(ren).
I understand what you're saying... but it still doesn't change the fact that you're wanting employers to treat people differently based on their lifestyle choices.
You must be logged in to comment. Log in or connect with
