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Mariana Caplan, Ph.D.

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When Spirituality Becomes a Mask

Posted: 10/03/11 01:56 PM ET

We become skillful actors, and while playing deaf and dumb to the real meaning of the teachings, we find some comfort in pretending to follow the path. ~Chogyam Trunpga Rinpoche

Given that global culture has been turned toward materialistic values in a way unprecedented in human history, it is inevitable that this same ethic would infiltrate our approach to spirituality. We live in a culture that values accumulation and consumption, and it is naïve of us to assume that simply because we are interested in spiritual growth that we have relinquished our materialism -- or even that we necessarily should.

There is nothing wrong with having an "om" symbol on your t-shirt or being an avid practitioner of meditation while also enjoying moneymaking and big business, but it is useful to explore, understand and check your integrity in relationship to your choices. Spiritual materialism is not a matter of the things that we have, but of our relationship to them.

We all resist seeing the ways in which we deceive ourselves on the spiritual path. It is an embarrassment to ego, though not to who we really are, to look in the mirror and see ourselves dressed in spiritual drag. Yet we allow ourselves to be exposed for the sake of greater freedom and to become more expansive through recognizing how we are limiting ourselves in the name of spirituality.

We also use spirituality to gain power, prestige, recognition and respect, and even to avoid our own troubles. And we misuse the very teachings, practices, and all the spiritual things we do and think to increase our awareness to avoid a deeper intimacy with the truth we seek. We use our practices, paraphernalia, and concepts to support ego rather than truth. Even a monk on a mountaintop can be attached to his robes or begging bowl as a way of creating a false sense of spiritual security.

The ego wants to think of spirituality as something it can "have" once and for all, and then we do not have to do the continual work of showing up and practicing moment after moment for the rest of our lives. The ego creates a whole identity around one's spiritual self. This is part of what we all do on the spiritual path, but it is helpful to learn to see it in ourselves.

There are many forms in which spiritual materialism may manifest:

The spiritual resume refers to the list of important spiritual people we have met, studied with, done a workshop with. At times we might find ourselves reciting our spiritual resume to impress ourselves or somebody else.

Spiritual storytelling takes the form of reciting narratives about our spiritual experiences. While they may be interesting, we often hide behind our stories to shield ourselves from the vulnerability of deeper human connection.

The spiritual high often manifests by going from workshop to teacher to beautiful place in order to stay on a perpetual high and avoid our own shadow, which is a different form of spiritual bypassing.

"Dharmacizing" refers to using spiritual jargon to account for our confusion and blind spots and to avoid relationship. If we're a dharmacizer and someone tells us they feel tension around us, we might counter with a truism such as, "It's just a passing phenomenon. Who is there to experience tension anyway?"

Spiritual shopping sprees are characterized by accumulating initiations, empowerments, and blessings from saints the way others collect cars, yachts, and second homes. We need to feel that we are always getting somewhere -- that we're becoming richer and better. Some people unconsciously believe that if they collect enough spiritual gold stars to become enlightened, they don't have to die.

The spiritualized ego imitates, often very well, what it imagines a spiritual person looks and sounds like. It can create a glow around itself, learn eloquent spiritual speech, and act mindful and detached -- yet there is something very unreal about it. I remember going to hear a particularly well-known spiritual teacher talk. He was trying too hard to act and talk spiritually--saying profound things and wearing a certain "knowing" smile -- yet his message was empty of feeling and dimension. His ego had integrated the spiritual teachings, but he had not.

The bulletproof ego has assimilated constructive feedback and integrated it into its defense structure. If someone shares an opinion about us we may say, "I know it appears that I'm being lazy and selfish, but I'm actually practicing just 'being' and taking care of myself." A spiritual teacher with a bulletproof ego may justify verbal abuse or economic extortions from his or her disciples by saying he or she is trying to cut through the egoic mechanism or trying to teach them they must learn to surrender all they have to the divine. The problem with people who have spiritualized and bulletproof egos is that they are extremely slippery and difficult to catch -- and it is particularly difficult to see how this spiritual defense mechanism operates within ourselves.

It is important to understand that spiritual materialism is less about the "what" and more about the "how" of relating to something -- whether it's a teacher, a new yoga outfit, or a concept. It is not a question of wealth or money but rather of attitude. I have encountered numerous sadhus, or holy men, in India who live as renunciative beggars, yet waved their fists at me when they felt the donation I gave them was insufficient or others' attachment to the pilgrim's staff they carried was as prideful as many bikers are about their prized Harley-Davidsons.

As we penetrate deeper into the layers of our own perception, we discover that the origin of all forms of spiritual materialism rests in the mind. We find that we can relate to information, facts, and even profound understanding in such a way that it precludes the emergence of deeper wisdom. At this most subtle level, in which even knowledge itself becomes a barrier to wisdom, our sword of discernment -- the deep desire to see ourselves clearly and the willingness to take feedback from others -- can cut through our confusion.

When we were studying the subject of spiritual materialism in a graduate school psychology class I was teaching, a young student raised her hand and said, "I know I am really drawn to spiritual life, and somehow what stops me is this really cool black-leather jacket I bought in Italy. I think that if I really give myself to spiritual life, I will have to give up my jacket, and I know it sounds ridiculous, but it really holds me back."

My student's leather jacket was a material possession, but we all have something -- a reason, possession, or something we tell ourselves that prevents us from looking at ourselves more deeply -- that can keep us away from the path for our whole lives. For many of us, in spite of our best intentions, our spirituality itself becomes one more layer of subtle armor behind which we shield ourselves from deeper truth.

[Adapted from Eyes Wide Open: Cultivating Discernment on the Spiritual Path, Sounds True, 2010]

 
We become skillful actors, and while playing deaf and dumb to the real meaning of the teachings, we find some comfort in pretending to follow the path. ~Chogyam Trunpga Rinpoche Given that global cul...
We become skillful actors, and while playing deaf and dumb to the real meaning of the teachings, we find some comfort in pretending to follow the path. ~Chogyam Trunpga Rinpoche Given that global cul...
 
 
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01:24 PM on 10/05/2011
I agreed with much and I am currently thinking on what I didn't agree on.
11:14 AM on 10/05/2011
The ego defined is the individual as aware of him or herself. When we are truly spiritual we must define ourselves in accordance with qualities of spirit so as to be spiritually sound and aware in our Ego from the Core of our being, hence, we become spiritual. The Core of being is in Unity with the Core of all beings and existences, if not, they would not Be existent. Now that we know that we are ONE with all that exist Please do something to better the Minds who are a part of You. All minds are a part of One Mind, and like a plant that only need nourishment for its growth, then anything else than good nutrition will cause it to "die" or not have physical, material existence. As we seek good nourishment to live, we must give Love/sustaining substance to support Life of All. Oneness.
10:42 PM on 10/04/2011
reminds of me CS Lewis. In Screwtape Letters, he says evil wants people to feel religious without being truly spiritual. I have to agree. I've met "Buddahists" who know nothing of Buddah or practice any abstinace and clutch the material. I've met "Christians" who do no charity work.
11:37 AM on 10/04/2011
While all these points are relatively valid, their currency is only useful in egoland.

The judgements of the cruel guru or the irate beggar are just that: judgements. The ego loves to rate other egos and pull everything known back to itself. It can only see through the filter of its own lens.

It is much more useful to let the illusion play out without our participation. It will anyway, so why get involoved in a losing game? Once the world is seen from the TRUTH of SELF all this stuff is simply irrelavant and the ego loses all its former power.

How long we remain there is a whole other topic, but we are never left helpless. Perfect LOVE is always available, if even for a fleeting moment. Then we can let ourselves and everyone else off the hook.
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french queen13
my beloved is mine and I am his
08:34 PM on 10/03/2011
And there are those of us with minimal-to-nonexistent interest in picking up this and that from Eastern beliefs anyway, and who see "detachment" as emotional disconnection, and for whom Spirit is a geography as much as anything else, and contact with those who've gone there as simply something anyone is latently capable of. I've done reiki as a useful tool, and that's it. I daresay that will get called a bulletproof ego, which is laughable. I call it being happy where I am and going my own way.
03:38 PM on 10/03/2011
con'd
Huffpost as any business does makes money from things; in this case words or words about things; it and no-one can make money from the non-physical; peopel can make money teaching about it or teaching it teaching it is the better of these but only the experience produces the better person; not analysing or philosophizing about it.doesthephysician heal by talking; the doctor gives some physical substance

for enlightenment [state of perfect health]the physical substance is the non-physical substance namely bliss Satchitananda
03:37 PM on 10/03/2011
mask is the physical body; reality is the simple spirit immortal deep within.

university and vatican are the same thing: way to complex and complicated; God made life userfriendly like computer engineer making computer user friendly. the problem is stresses[distortions in the machinery which results in mind i.e. entropy in th system] the problemis not ego

compare this blog to e.g. St Clement of alexandria writing in the 6th century about how one should live. its the same thing. that is clergy became psychologists and today psychologisrs are clergy.

psychotherapists know nothing about spirituality sprituality is the non-physical field; very subtle the mind is relative to the body but it is still in the physical realm; sprituality is beyond time and space; it is immortal and eternal. in the experience of transcendence one is on that moment detached or not attached to any physical or any thought in the mind; then after that experience in meditation or in some restfull state or any moment of dynamism collapsing into absolute silence one is still in the body anchored to reality fully attached to the world and relationships in the world;

con'd
02:04 PM on 10/03/2011
Good article because there is a lot to choose from in the area of spirituality if one is new and wants to learn . . .unfortunately, much of what is put forth is to make $$ rather than to truly assist the 'seeker' . . I work with the Angelic Realm and was always told to listen first to my heart and then to my gut . . .to use my discernment . . . to distinquish between the true teachers and the 'poseurs'
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
ZenGardner
This is NOT the Zen you're looking for.
01:52 PM on 10/03/2011
People want to feel special because they meditate or go to spiritual retreats, or have 1000 Buddha statues... big deal. They aren't hurting anyone.
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Saijanai
Micro bio? We don't need no stinkin' micro bio...
12:18 PM on 10/03/2011
What I was taught, and I found it to be true in my own life, is that a truly spiritual practice spontaneously leads to fewer mistakes in life. The road may be long, slow, tortuous, etc., and you might be able to avoid much suffering along the way by using cultural and religious guidelines to help you avoid the most egregious pitfalls, but if you really are on the road to enlightenment, you're going to develop, over time, totally spontaneously, a better set of behavioral/emotional patterns in your life. It's a side-effect of becoming enlightened. However, just as enlightenment is a never-ending process, so too are changes in behavioral and emotional patterns, so judging another's spirituality others according to your preconceptions of what is right and wrong behavior, is just another form of arrogance. If someone breaks a law or behaves unethically, society will punish them for violations of the social norm. It is not up to you to decide whether they are more or less enlightened than you are.
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whirlpool
founder walnut tree congregation
01:28 PM on 10/03/2011
Good point. My sister-in-law keeps after me trying to bring me back to her cumbaya type religion which makes me want to wretch to be honest. I asked her to just leave me alone but she just can't do it. I find many so called spiritual people to be really annoying.
10:46 PM on 10/04/2011
Sorry. I've met vegetarians the same way. It's not about improving my health, its about them lecturing me. Converting me is a pat on their ego.
11:28 AM on 10/03/2011
This really helps me to beter understand a recent exchange I had with Swami Brahmanand­­a on the Daily Chill Pill. Thank you!
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whirlpool
founder walnut tree congregation
10:37 AM on 10/03/2011
If the history of mysticism is any indication, truly spiritual people live in caves out in the desert and talk to animals, plants and rocks.
11:02 AM on 10/03/2011
Dead wrong.
A truly spiritual person is one who is at ease with the world around him/her, where ever and whatever it is.
Those who live in caves and out in the desert may go there for temporary solitude, but those who run away from the world are escapists.... not truly spiritual
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Saijanai
Micro bio? We don't need no stinkin' micro bio...
12:09 PM on 10/03/2011
Eh, judge not lest you be judged...

Fact is, some people prefer solitude for many reason. Some could be called spiritual and some might merely be nut cases. Either way, as long as they aren't hurting anyone (including themselves), it is their choice, and to call someone "not truly spiritual" for doing something as innocuous as becoming a permanent hermit is every bit as silly as calling someone "not truly spiritual" simply because they are good at business.
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whirlpool
founder walnut tree congregation
01:21 PM on 10/03/2011
I don't think it is dead wrong--maybe just half baked. I was thinking of people like John the Baptist, Jesus (during the 40 day thing) Saint Francis and the ancient shamans. I also disagree that those who go into deep nature are necessarily escapist and not truly spiritual. My closest contacts with the wild gods of nature have been in nature which is both beautiful and terrifying.
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ZenGardner
This is NOT the Zen you're looking for.
01:54 PM on 10/03/2011
Makes it tough to find a place to do a number 2. Be careful that you don't use Poison Ivy...
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whirlpool
founder walnut tree congregation
03:05 PM on 10/03/2011
No kidding. Reminds me of the camping trip into the Steens Mtn. wilderness. I inadvertently tangled with stinging nettles while doing business. Very difficult to ride the horse home.
04:38 AM on 10/03/2011
We all want to wear our"spirituality" on our sleeve.... wherein lies the problem.
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auramac
11:58 AM on 10/03/2011
True. It can be a fashion statement.
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Saijanai
Micro bio? We don't need no stinkin' micro bio...
12:21 PM on 10/03/2011
Bothering to wear any clothing at all could be seen as a "fashion statement."