When the writer's strike was coming to a close, I (like most of America) was overjoyed by the idea of new episodes of Scrubs, 30 Rock and Grey's Anatomy. Moreover I relished the return of political satire (the Daily Show, the Colbert Report, SNL) that is an amalgamation of two of the things I hold most dear (politics, and, well, satire). I could only wait with anticipation for the monologues of Jon Stewart and the like about my preferred candidate -- Barack Obama -- that had been acutely lacking during the most important months of the primary season. But then Tina Fey (my ultimate girl crush) made her now-famous "bitch is the new black" comment on SNL's return show, and I was saddened, confused, left to the cold comfort of my DVR.
But now I understand. Ms. Fey supports Senator Clinton because the Clinton campaign has become a running advertisement for Fey's screenwriting debut, "Mean Girls."
Mean Girls, the insta-cult-classic on high school drama, is the story of Regina George, a queen bee (defined as "Mainly a woman in a power position, the 'bee' can sometimes stand for 'Bitch'") who tears down any competitor in her way by petty sniping, backhanded insults and vicious rumors about their character.
Sound familiar?
First there was the little spat between James Carville and Bill Richardson when Governor Richardson endorsed Senator Obama. "An act of betrayal," said James Carville. "Mr. Richardson's endorsement came right around the anniversary of the day when Judas sold out for 30 pieces of silver, so I think the timing is appropriate, if ironic." Can't you just hear Regina George? "Who does []he think []he is? ... I like invented [him], you know what I mean?"
Then last night Senator Clinton "engaged fairly gleefully" with Bill O'Reilly, that bastion of maturity and objective thought, on Senator Obama's relationship with Reverend Wright. "I think he made his views clear, finally, that he disagreed, and I think that's what he had to do."
Like, all I'm saying, Senator Obama doesn't believe everything Reverend Wright says, as far as I know.
Senator Obama, you'll recall, had his own chance to act like a mean girl at the ABC news debate, when George Stephanopoulos asked him about Senator Clinton's sniper fire comments, saying "Do you believe that Senator Clinton has been fully truthful about her past?" Senator Obama could easily have gone off on a lengthy diatribe about how trust in one's commander in chief is paramount to voters, but instead he remarked, "I think Senator Clinton deserves, you know, the right to make some errors once in a while. I'm -- obviously, I make some as well."
Huh. Is Senator Obama like, an adult?
Forget the kitchen sink, the Clinton campaign has thrown its mean girl "Burn Book" at him. Because while the oft-referenced sink strategy means throwing everything they can get their hands on at him, the idea of a Burn Book is far closer to the truth. In Mean Girls, Regina George creates malicious rumors composed of 5% truth and 95% nasty suggestion and outright lies to completely denigrate the character of otherwise innocent people.
Bill Ayers anyone? The combination of "'McCarthyism' and 'Swiftboating'" that Stanley Fish described on his blog that the Clinton campaign (and the McCain campaign) are now employing against Senator Obama is, as Fish says, "particularly lethal and despicable."
"HELL no [he] did NOT leave the South Side for THIS."
If Senator Clinton insists upon continuing her mean girl mission, I'd like to remind her of the lessons handed over in the end-of-the-movie-monologue. "Calling somebody else fat won't make you any skinnier. Calling someone stupid doesn't make you any smarter. And ruining [someone]'s life definitely [won't] make [you] any happier. All you can do in life is try to solve the problem in front of you."
Don't ruin the Democratic Party, Senator Clinton. So stop your "bitching" and burning and let's try to solve the problem in front of us -- John McCain.
Loading comments…
Posted May 1, 2008 | 02:18 PM (EST)