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Marie Marley
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Marie Marley is the author of Come Back Early Today: A Memoir of Love, Alzheimer’s and Joy. This book tells the powerful 30-year love story of a young American woman and a delightfully colorful, wickedly eccentric Romanian gentleman and scholar, interspersed with advice and inspiration for Alzheimer’s caregivers everywhere.

In addition to being a compelling love story, this award-winning memoir shows how one woman solved several specific problems that typically arise when caring for a person with dementia.

Alzheimer’s caregivers who have read the book say it helped them very much. Former caregivers say they wish they’d read it when they were caregivers.

Come Back Early Today will make you laugh; it will make you cry. If you’re caring for a loved one with Alzheimer’s it will give you inspiration and advice. But mostly it will give you hope and it will help you see that there can be happiness – even joy – amid the darkness of dementia.

The book was a finalist in the Santa Fe Writer’s Project Literary Awards, Eric Hoffer First Horizon Awards, Readers Choice competition, Editors and Writers International Awards, and Indie Excellence Awards. The Foreword was written by Gregg Warshaw, MD, Past President of the American Geriatrics Society. Go to www.ComeBackEarlyToday.com to sign up for Marie's Newsletter and read the first two chapters for free.

Marie’s website contains a wealth of information for Alzheimer’s caregivers. She can be reached at Marie@ComeBackEarlyToday.com/

Entries by Marie Marley

Alzheimer's Journal: Tears for Yesterday

(0) Comments | Posted February 6, 2016 | 8:42 AM

Having a loved one who has Alzheimer's can be incredibly painful. The following story is a case in point.

One day I went to visit Ed, my beloved Romanian soul mate of 30 years, at the Alois Alzheimer's Center in Cincinnati. When I arrived I heard someone pounding away...

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When Your Loved One Is Ready for Hospice Care - and You Aren't

(3) Comments | Posted January 30, 2016 | 8:45 AM

Many painful emotional issues face family members and friends when a loved one becomes terminally ill. These include communicating the diagnosis to others; overcoming denial that the person is, in fact, near death; feeling the need to "be strong" and hide their sadness for the benefit of the patient and...

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When a Loved One Has Alzheimer's: Realization vs. Acceptance

(0) Comments | Posted January 18, 2016 | 7:37 AM

These are two different things. It's one thing to finally realize someone close to you has Alzheimer's. It's a completely different thing to accept that fact.

After what can be months or even years of being in denial, most people finally realize Alzheimer's has struck. And they begin becoming a...

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Overcoming Denial When a Loved One Has Alzheimer's

(2) Comments | Posted January 9, 2016 | 11:22 AM

George, a close friend of my life partner, Ed Theodoru, was visiting from out of town. One evening they had a long talk about a wide range of topics - most of which concerned George's professional issues. The next day Ed had no memory of the visit, let alone what...

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What to Do -- And Not Do -- at a Nursing Home

(0) Comments | Posted December 20, 2015 | 5:06 AM

Visiting loved ones in their nursing homes is essential for your well-being as well as theirs. When your loved one is admitted, talk with the administrator or director of nursing about their policies for visits. Some facilities have written guidelines. If they don't, have a general discussion with them about...

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A Nursing Home Aide's Shocking Behavior

(11) Comments | Posted December 11, 2015 | 1:18 PM

I had recently moved Ed, my beloved Romanian soul mate of thirty years, into the renowned Alois Alzheimer's Center in Cincinnati, Ohio. After he'd been in their Assisted Living section for around four weeks I received a call from the social worker.

"You're moving him from Assisted Living down to...

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A Man With Alzheimer's and the Dog Who Forecasted His Death

(23) Comments | Posted December 3, 2015 | 7:57 AM

Peter, my precious little Shih Tzu puppy, was brown and white with enormous brown eyes; his tail never stopped wagging. I was so happy I'd chosen him. Actually, I didn't choose Peter. He chose me. Like the Mona Lisa, his eyes followed me everywhere I went in the pet store....

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New Book Offers Hope for Alzheimer's Caregivers

(0) Comments | Posted November 25, 2015 | 5:40 AM

Today I want to let you know about a new book for Alzheimer's caregivers that I wrote with neurologist Daniel C. Potts, MD, FAAN. It's entitled Finding Joy in Alzheimer's: New Hope for Caregivers, and has a foreword by Maria Shriver, whose father, Sargent Shriver, had the disease.

The...

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How I Got My Beloved Romanian Soul Mate With Alzheimer's to Stop Driving

(0) Comments | Posted November 14, 2015 | 9:08 AM

Late one evening I was deeply immersed in editing the photographs I'd taken at the Cincinnati Zoo that day when I was startled by the phone ringing. I thought it was probably Ed, my beloved Romanian soul mate.

But it wasn't.

It was a sweet female voice I didn't recognize...

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Focus on the Roses in Alzheimer's Care

(0) Comments | Posted November 7, 2015 | 5:05 AM

"The optimist sees the rose and not its thorns; the pessimist stares at the thorns, oblivious of the rose." - Kahlil Gibran

John is distraught when he visits his wife, Jean. First of all, he finds the facility per se depressing. While walking to his wife's room,...

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3 Things to Never Say to an Alzheimer's Caregiver

(0) Comments | Posted October 31, 2015 | 8:41 AM

One of my recent articles published here was 5 Things to Never Say to a Person Who Has Alzheimer's. Today's article focuses on things to never say to an Alzheimer's caregiver.

There are several things you should never say. Here are three important ones:

1. "What a Shame:"...

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Surviving as an Alzheimer's Caregiver

(5) Comments | Posted October 23, 2015 | 10:42 AM

I was an Alzheimer's caregiver for seven years. I was not prepared for the mental and physical demands of caring for someone with dementia. As time passed my emotional state declined as fast as my loved one, Ed's dementia progressed. It became a vicious cycle.

How did I cope? How...

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5 Things to Never Say to a Person Who Has Alzheimer's

(37) Comments | Posted October 15, 2015 | 2:50 PM

Yesterday afternoon I walked into Mary's spacious room. Mary is a woman who has few visitors and whom I've volunteered to spend a little time with every week. I greeted her, complimented her on her beautiful turquoise sweater, and shook her hand.

Then I sat down at her little...

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Nursing Home Placement: Damned if You Do, Damned if You Don't

(1) Comments | Posted October 8, 2015 | 10:59 AM

I'm talking here about the dreaded "N" word -- nursing home. I'm talking about placing your loved one with Alzheimer's in a care facility. Virtually no one wants to do it and few if any people want to go. This will be one of the most difficult, heart-wrenching decisions you,...

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Why I Love Being Bipolar

(9) Comments | Posted September 15, 2015 | 10:45 AM

I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder when I was in my mid-30s. Bipolar disorder doesn't run in my family -- it gallops! Numerous relatives have it as did several others who have passed away.

I have seen this disorder torture many of these people and, in some cases, destroy their...

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Compose Yourself!

(0) Comments | Posted September 7, 2015 | 7:08 AM

Author's Note: Nearly every week I publish an article here about Alzheimer's. And they're all deadly serious. A co-worker once asked me if I ever laugh. And another one asked me if I ever write something just for fun. So I wrote the following in response to those questions. I...

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7 Tips for Downsizing Without the Heartache

(6) Comments | Posted September 3, 2015 | 8:20 AM

It isn't uncommon for people to want to downsize to a smaller home either when they retire or just before retirement. Let's look at reasons they do that, some of the heartaches that can be associated with it and 7 tips for avoiding that heartache.

Why People Typically Downsize: The...

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Despite Alzheimer's, He Praised His Loved One to the Very End

(5) Comments | Posted August 28, 2015 | 12:10 PM

We often read about people with Alzheimer's who are incredibly difficult to get along with. I'd like to balance that out by providing some examples of my Romanian life partner, Ed, who started off that way but later became one of the sweetest, most loving, adorable people you'd ever want...

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People Living With Alzheimer's Can Still Enjoy Life

(7) Comments | Posted August 22, 2015 | 9:03 AM

Many people regard Alzheimer's as a cruel and devastating disease that destroys its 'victims.' One that robs them of their very humanity. Caregivers may fall into a period of deep depression and despondence when the diagnosis is made. Anticipatory grief also may develop. One realizes that life as it had...

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Denial May Deprive Alzheimer's Caregivers of Joy

(0) Comments | Posted August 14, 2015 | 5:59 AM

Alexandru was a close relative of Ed - my beloved Romanian soulmate of 30 years. Alexandru was visiting Ed from out of town. One evening they had a long talk about a wide range of topics - most of which concerned Alexandru's professional issues. The next day Ed had no...

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