There's no doubt that there is something genius about the formula that is the Real Housewives franchise. It's everything you've ever wanted your life to be... but you just can't afford. I love all of the housewives but there is a special place in my heart for the ladies of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. Every Monday night for the past few months they have been teaching us valuable life lessons that have not only made season three of the series the best yet, but have educated and delights millions of people. Let's take a look at the valuable life lessons Lisa, Kyle, Kim, Adrienne, Yolanda, Brandi and Taylor have taught us during season three of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills.
1. When in Doubt, Throw a Party...
Adrienne had a rough year on the show, so what does she do when her marriage is falling apart and Brandi has run around town for months airing all of her dirty laundry for the world to hear? She throws a fabulous party chock full of stunts that only La Maloof would be able to get away with. Granted, news of her impending separation spread like wildfire the next day, it was still a wonderful way to pretend like nothing was wrong and get a few friends drunk in the process.
2. ...Unless You're Kyle Richards.
I love you, Kyle, but every time you throw a party disaster strikes! Hello! Last year's White Party featured a debacle that involved Taylor and Russell getting the boot and this year found Brandi, Adrienne and Paul at odds. Perhaps next year's White Party should involve a prayer circle and fruit punch because every time Kyle has an event, drama's abound.
3. Everything Sounds Nicer When It's Coming From Someone With an Accent.
The undisputed Queen B of the Beverly Hills Housewives gets away with her snarky remarks for one reason and one reason only: she has a fabulous accent. Some of the things that she says are just downright mean. But, who the hell cares when it's coming from such a well-spoken, flawlessly gorgeous woman? Her bitchiness is pretty much forgivable on any occasion. Oh, and Lisa: we love you so much that we totally forgive you Vanderpump Rules.
4. Life Is More Fun When You Gang Up on Your Friends.
Every season of the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, it seems as though the ladies pick one person to gang up on and it brings the rest of them together. This season it was clearly Adrienne that everyone disliked; last season is was a toss-up between Kim and Taylor; and the first season, everyone pretty much hated Camille. When you gang up on someone, even if you don't really have beef with them, it's pretty much a guarantee that it will bring you closer to the rest of your friends.
5. You Need to Pull Your Own Weight.
It's important in a circle of friends, to pull your own weight and the housewives taught us just that this year when Yolanda came around. Honestly, she was kind of boring to begin with but someone must have told her she needed to get interesting or she was going to get the boot because just last week she picked a fight with Taylor and then out of nowhere came to Brandi's defense during a fight with Fay at Lisa's housewarming party. Well played, Yolanda. Looks like she's here to stay.
6. Getting to Paris Is Easy, Affordable and Effortless.
Arranging a trip to Paris is not only affordable but can be arranged in moments. This season, Kyle, Kim, Lisa, Yolanda and Brandi spirited away to Paris. However, moments before the trip took place, Brandi (who is seemingly not as well off as the rest of the ladies, so getting to Paris must not be that expensive) wasn't even scheduled to go, but managed to arrange a flight, hotel and arrangements for her children in minutes flat. So, next time you plan on traveling internationally, take a page out of the housewives book -- it takes little to no effort at all.
7. Don't Tell Brandi Glanville Anything. EVER.
I love me some Brandi. However, in the off chance that I happen to encounter her during my next trip to Beverly Hills, I don't plan on divulging any personal information to her, because if I do, all of the 310 will know about it within seconds. That woman makes for such great television, it's almost unbelievable.
8. When Life Gets Boring, Throw Camille Grammer Into the Mix.
I don't know why Camille has been a little MIA this season, but every time she breezes on screen, it's like a breath of fresh air. The first season centered around her unfortunate and very public divorce with Kelsey Grammer (and ever since, I haven't been able to stomach reruns of Frasier), while the second season focused on her rebuilding her life post-Kelsey. Recently, she hasn't been as active on the show, which is a disappointment because every time she's around (Hello! The trip to Vegas was EPIC!) it's pretty much certain that life will be more entertaining.
9. Plastic Surgery Is Fun!
Between Kyle's mother-in-law's face lift last year and Kim's nose job this year, the housewives have taught us that, not only is plastic surgery necessary, but also worthy of throwing a fabulous party for.
10. Being a Real Housewife is AMAZING.
Because television is just like real life, being a Real Housewife of Beverly Hills means you never have to do laundry, clean, or really take care of anything around you actual house because, let's face it, you pay to have someone to do that for you.
There you have it! The 10 life lessons we learned from this season of the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. But don't take my word for it. Check out the season finale tonight at 8 pm EST on Bravo, followed by part one of the reunion special at 9pm EST.
Follow Mark Brennan Rosenberg on Twitter: www.twitter.com/markbrosenberg