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Spain Claims it Originated French Kissing -- and Sues France

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Madrid, Spain -- Ever heard of Spanish Kissing? You will if the Spanish government wins its current lawsuit against France. Spain is claiming that the world's most passionate and popular kiss -- the open-mouthed French kiss -- originated, not in France, but in Spain in 1605. "And we have documentation to back that up," states Julio Salazar, President of the Society for the Promotion of Spanish Kissing, which is spearheading the lawsuit.

Salazar refers to what is perhaps Spain's most famous novel, Don Quixote de la Mancha, by Miguel de Cervantes. In the following passage from the novel, published in 1605, Cervantes describes how the buxom country girl, Dulcinea, kisses a peasant man:

Dulcinea and Pedro kissed with all their heart and with their mouths fully open, tongues exploring tongues, teeth, lips, mouth. Poor Sancho got overheated watching them. But Dulcinea explained that it was the only way lovers kissed in her village and in the surrounding villages as well.

Salazar accuses France of stealing the Spanish kiss, claiming it as its own, and promoting it throughout the world as the French kiss. "For centuries, romantic couples have been flocking to Paris as the City of Love, partially due to the image of the 'French kiss,'" explains Salazar. "That cost Spain an untold fortune in tourist dollars. It's time to recover some of those dollars -- and return the Spanish kiss to its rightful originator!"

In a related development, Cuba is suing Sweden, claiming that Swedish meatballs originated in Havana.