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Mark Simpson
Mark Simpson is credited with/blamed for coining the term "metrosexual" in the U.K. national The Independent in 1994 and introducing it to the U.S. in an essay on in 2002. He is the author of several books, including Male Impersonators and Saint Morrissey. His latest, Metrosexy: A 21st Century Self-Love Story, is now available from Kindle. His blog is at

Entries by Mark Simpson

Dobbin and Kitty Ride Again

(1) Comments | Posted September 24, 2013 | 7:34 PM

Contrary to what the pop songs tell you, the language of love is not universal. It really isn't the same the world over, or even on the same street. Everyone's love affair is utterly unintelligible to everyone else. It's perhaps the whole point of having one.

This fact can make...

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The Global Glory Hole

(156) Comments | Posted September 12, 2013 | 9:00 AM

I was 16 when saw my first glory hole -- or, rather, saw my first filled glory hole. It was in Harrogate, North Yorkshire, a public-spirited, snobbish spa town well-served by shiny Victorian lavatories. The throbbing, fleshy wall fitting in my tiled cubicle was quite a sight. Glorious, even. Truly an impressive,...

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'Do You Shave Your Chest?'

(147) Comments | Posted June 17, 2013 | 1:55 PM

When I joined the British Territorial Army infantry back in the late '90s (bit of a long story) and had my medical, the (woman) doctor asked a topless me, "Do you shave your chest?" It was still verboten back then to be gay and in the army, so I hurriedly...

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Rupert Everett's Fetchingly Flabby Bottom

(7) Comments | Posted May 13, 2013 | 12:27 PM

I'm currently devouring Rupert Everett's delicious second volume of memoirs, Vanished Years, straight after finishing the first, Red Carpets and Other Banana Skins (though it should probably be read...

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Sex With Someone You Love

(28) Comments | Posted May 7, 2013 | 2:06 PM

May is National Masturbation Month. Shake hands with the president. Again.

Without warning or indication, a bastard blue van pulls out from a side street, right in front of me, forcing me to brake. Hard. So I respond in the customary English way, by leaning out of the window and...

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'I'd F*ck Me': Mirror Man-Love

(63) Comments | Posted April 26, 2013 | 1:17 PM

WARNING: Hipsters and gay bears may want to watch this ad backwards.

I'm rather taken with this refreshingly direct ad currently airing on MTV for a Philips Norelco product that promises to "shave, style...

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Buzz Bissinger's Metrosexy Addiction

(2) Comments | Posted April 16, 2013 | 6:14 PM

There's nothing quite so deafening as the sound of liberal America tutting online. Mostly, in this instance, they're deafening themselves. To the sound of their own hypocrisy.

The 58-year-old Pulitzer prize-winning sports journalist and best-selling author Buzz Bissinger caused a minor tsunami of scandale, disgust and derision recently with a...

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Diet C*ck: Coca-Cola's Porno Promo

(96) Comments | Posted March 25, 2013 | 1:36 PM

As an avid voyeur of the media's marketing of the male body, I meant to write about this new Diet Coke advertisement, "Gardener," when it first strutted its stuff about a month or...

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How to Spot a Sodomite

(23) Comments | Posted February 25, 2013 | 8:33 PM


"I had never seen anything like it before. ... I do not in my practice ever remember to have seen such an appearance of the anus as those of the prisoners presented." So testified Dr. Paul in shocked tones at the 1870...

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Beckham's Bum: Satisfaction or Disappointment?

(64) Comments | Posted February 12, 2013 | 5:21 PM

I don't have much to say about the latest, much-discussed David Beckham ad for his H&M underwear, directed by fellow L.A.-loving Brit Guy Ritchie, in which he runs through Beverly Hills in his white slippers as the props and scenery conspire to remove his clothes, Cupid Stunt-like, except, "Those slippers...

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Little Richard's Big, Glam Legacy

(17) Comments | Posted December 5, 2012 | 3:02 PM

Today, Dec. 5, Richard Wayne Penniman, better known as Little Richard, The King of Rockin' 'n' Rollin' Rhythm & Blues Soulin', turns 80.

Whether or not Mr. Penniman invented rock 'n' roll, as he has often loudly and boldly claimed -- and, to be sure, he's got a better, prettier...

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Swishy Villainy and Psychodrama in Skyfall

(16) Comments | Posted November 28, 2012 | 11:57 AM

When, at their first meeting in the latest Bond "outing," Skyfall, a rather forward Raoul Silva, played by a bleached-blond Javier Bardem, takes caddish advantage of James Bond's indisposition (tied as he is to a chair), running his hands over 007's craggy face, ripped chest and powerful thighs and flirtatiously...

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Does Magic Mike Have Anything to Stick Himself With?

(24) Comments | Posted July 13, 2012 | 11:38 PM

WARNING: This post contains graphic language. Reader discretion is advised.

Magic Mike: the money shot.

The ani­mated gif above will save you $12 to $14 and 108 min­utes of disappointment.

Yes, I've done my invert duty and been to see Magic Mike,...

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Fag Up!

(12) Comments | Posted October 12, 2011 | 9:05 AM

I want to talk about you about something very dear to the heart of America and very close to its loins, something that the media can't get enough of -- or stop ramming down our throats. I want to talk to you about manly strap-ons, and the fear of The...

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