Families Of Fallen Soldiers Sound Off On McCain-Palin

After reading my last blog post, Jeff from Arizona asked if I would be interested in interviewing Gold Star Families from across the country, that is, families who have lost sons and daughters fighting in Iraq. My sincere thanks to all those who volunteered to be interviewed. These people have a lot to say. They hope America will hear them.

Jane wasn't raised in a political household in Southern California; she describes it simply as a "military family." She lost her 24-year-old son Evan in July, 2003, when he was killed in action on the perimeter of an oil field. She described Evan as "a beautiful man with a wonderful sense of humor who had a passion for music," and recalled "his way of focusing on an individual, of making them feel as though his world revolved around them. This is the thing everyone will remember about him, the fact that he made such an indelible impression on everyone who met him." Evan, she said, "was everyone's best friend. Many of the people who have spoken of him, whether from school, sports or the Army have referred to Evan as their best friend. He was a gifted musician, a gifted student, he adored his little brother, and loved his wife and family deeply." Jane is following the current presidential race closely, and for her it's not just politics as usual. It's personal. She will vote Democratic although she expressed qualms about the Obama/Biden ticket, citing Biden's support of the war in Iraq. But those qualms are minor compared to how she feels about the Republican ticket. "John McCain and Sarah Palin are scary people," Sue said emphatically. "I believe they will make sure our Constitution is lost forever." The thought of seeing another Republican in the White House terrifies her and makes her angry. "When is America going to wake up to the fact that our economy has been shattered by the cost of the occupation of Iraq? We are allowing our young men and women to be killed off in an illegal war, we've given up our privacy and other basic freedoms and our planet will not be inhabitable by future generations. In 8 short years the Republican party has completed the destruction of our democracy."

Tracy is an academic adviser for a state university in Maryland. When asked to describe her son Nick, she replied, "Nick was incredibly charismatic. He always had friends around him, partly because he was always looking out for the underdog." Nick wanted to be a Marine "from the time he was in middle school" and he died as a Marine in the battle of Fallujah. "A sniper," she said, "he was shot in the head and killed by a sniper." After the death of her son, Tracy decided to run for office, partly "as a way to make the world a better place, as Nick was trying to do." She's always voted ("those who don't vote have no right to complain"), and while not always voting Democratic, this year she supports the Democratic presidential candidate "fervently." Like Jane, Tracy sees the link between our economic troubles and the war in Iraq: "We have spent so much money we don't have on this war that we have completely ruined the US economy as well as that of most of the rest of the world." Tracy described why she supports Barack Obama, saying, " he's very quick and intelligent. He has a good grasp of the issues and an ability to find the nugget of truth. I think some of his ideas may seem pie-in-the sky, but I think if we aim very high we will reach farther than if we just aim for what we know we can accomplish." In contrast, she considers John McCain "bumbling and incompetent" and when asked if she had serious concerns about any of the four candidates acting as Commander in Chief, she replied succinctly, "You bet: Palin first. McCain second."

A business owner in New York, Sue recalls her son Seth as "a kind, warm-hearted individual. His love was his family, his mustang and people." What made her laugh the most was "how rough and tumble he could be, but always done with a smirk on his face: he was mischievous." But the one thing everyone will remember about Seth, Sue said, "is simple: he never left you without saying 'I Love You.' Those were his last words, on the last call home." Seth was killed in Iraq in 2004, on what Sue referred to as "a suicide mission, " and she remembers what he told her before returning to Iraq for the last time. "Seth said, 'Mom, we will never win this war. The people do not want us there.'" While admitting she hasn't always voted, like Tracy and Jane, Sue says she's following this presidential campaign very closely. She spoke approvingly of Obama ("I like his war stance, and his philosophy on economics.") but had nothing good to say about the Republican ticket, especially John McCain. "He's Bush again," Sue said with disgust, adding, "what has McCain done so far for the veterans except take benefits away from them:?" Sue called Palin "a joke that I hope the American people will not fall into, especially the women who originally supported Clinton. That would be a mistake; she is not Hillary." She thinks Palin was picked because McCain "needed a women to do all the dirty work for him," adding, "she's a little lady that knows nothing but thinks she knows everything." Come November, Sue will be voting for Obama.

A commercial airline pilot, Jeff spent 21 years as a fighter pilot with the United States Air Force, and his family has a rich military history: "I had nine aunts and uncles; all but three served in WWII. My aunt and my grandmother were 'Rose the Riveters,' building B-17s at the Boeing facility in Wichita Kansas." His son loved to cook, "Jesse started cooking at age nine!" Jeff recalled, and he wanted to follow in his father's military footsteps, joining the junior ROTC in middle school. Although diagnosed with leukemia, Jesse still "dreamed of becoming a soldier," and was serving in Balad, Iraq, as a driver with the Army Reserve when he suffered a relapse. He died in Arizona in 2007. Already active politically, the loss of his son strengthened Jeff's resolve to "work for candidates that are best for the community and country." Jeff is a strong backer of Barack Obama, calling him "inspiring. Obama seems to represent the values that will help bring out the best of the county." But Jeff reserves his strongest words for Sarah Palin, and they were not complimentary. "Palin is very inexperienced. Examining her resume you will find a blank slate. No job experience at all." And the decorated fighter pilot added, "The thought that she could very easily be the one who will send our sons and daughters to fight more failing military-backed foreign relations, it chills me. Considering her complete lack of experience, that would be worse than having a bartender run my airline."

Karen also comes from a military family; she was a "Military brat" and now describes herself as "a proud Gold Star Mom." Her son, Ken, was a 4th generation Army officer, and he was Karen's only child. Having raised him by herself from the time he was 10 months old, Karen movingly called Ken "my grounding, my north star." Karen recalled her son's "great sense of humor. He lit up a room whenever he entered; people always knew they were in for adventure when he was around." She said Ken loved music, "any kind of music, as long as it was loud - metal, country, opera, classical, rock and roll. He often played music full blast from his Abrams tank as they patrolled the streets of Iraq. His guys told me it was like being in a movie." The two were very close, said Karen: "I made sure Ken knew how much he was loved and he made me feel the same." Ken was 26 when he died in 2004. "We were told Ken was killed by small arms fire," Karen said. "But 15 months after Ken was killed, the Army came to my house to tell me that Ken had not died the way they told me. In fact, he was killed by the accidental discharge of the unmanned M240 machine gun on his tank when it brushed against a tree branch as the tank was maneuvering the streets to return to their camp." This year Karen is more than just interested in the presidential campaign, saying honestly, "I am obsessed with it. The results of the 2000 election put into place policies that would cost me the life of my son."

Karen is unequivocal on the importance of this campaign, stating, "This election is life and death to me." Like Jane, Karen voiced some concerns about Barack Obama, saying he's "too close to the center" for her, but added, "I think he will collaborate more than others and certainly give the world a better face of America." When asked her opinion of John McCain, Karen checked off the reasons she disliked him: "3rd Bush term, intolerant, hawk, disrespectful of Vets, particularly this current generation of Veterans. In many ways he will be more destructive than Bush." And Sarah Palin? "Pistol packing, moose hunting, anti-choice, anti-women's issues, anti-environment, disrespectful, mean, power abusing, fundamentalist religious fanatic. She is Cheney and Bush in a dress. Need I continue?" Like the others interviewed, Karen described the idea of Palin as Commander in Chief as "frightening. It frightens me both for our country and our military. Her shoot from the hip attitude, lack of any depth of foreign policy experience or even curiosity ,and her heavy reliance on wisdom from God, rather than experts and empirical evidence, scares me." Karen has always voted, and so did her son, adding: "Because Ken felt voting was a responsibility and a privilege, he even voted from Iraq." And with so much on the line she's not just voting for Obama, she said, she's working to get him elected.

Gilda is a school teacher in Maryland. Like Karen, Gilda lost her only child in Iraq, in an explosion in Al Anbar province. Alex was 28, recently married, and on his second deployment; Gilda said when looking at photos of that second deployment she could clearly see "the sheer sense of responsibility that weighed on my son. He would not have gone if he'd had a choice but he knew he had a job to do and he was not going to shirk his responsibility." She recalls how much Alex loved to play the guitar, and how "he would gather his friends here at the house for jam sessions, and everyone would end up at our table for dinner afterward. Our house was often filled with the laughter and music of these childhood friends of my son." With heartbreaking candor, Gilda continues, "His father and I have not begun to cope with this void in our lives. It's been impossible to come anywhere close to accepting that he lies across the river buried in Arlington cemetery, and for reasons that we have not come to grips with." Gilda has channeled her grief and anger into this presidential campaign, with her major issues being, "the war in Iraq and benefits for Iraq Vets, and bringing our country back on the right course." Originally a Hillary Clinton supporter, she says Barack Obama "inspires me, his words make me think that in all this darkness we have lived, that in all this suffering we have experienced, there is a hope for the future of this country of ours." Obama, she continues, "would be able to lead the country out of the disaster of the last 8 years, the so-called 'Bush Doctrine,'" and Gilda's a strong supporter of his running mate, saying "Joe Biden could very well serve as President if need be. He strikes me as sincere and genuine, a man who has experienced tremendous personal loss who does not use it to make points, a man who has the empathy, intelligence and experience to fill in as President." With an obvious reference to Sarah Palin, Gilda added: "THAT is how a vp candidate has to be regarded." She calls the Palin selection "the most appalling, disingenuous political event I have ever witnessed in my life," adding, "I am in tremendous fear of someone as unreflective and plainly incompetent as Sarah Palin becoming our Commander in Chief."

But she had even harsher words for Palin's running mate. "What sort of character can a man possess who is willing to back pedal on so many important issues simply to fit the Republican party line and gain the office of president? Then there is the other nagging problem that this man is not fit to be president; a man with a fuse that can be blown with so little provocation has no business in the position of 'leader of the free world.' A man who would banter about bombing another country cannot ever be allowed in this position of such power. A man whose judgment in picking a vice presidential candidate solely for her ability to draw votes to his sagging popularity shows his incompetence as a leader, let alone anyone with military experience. It will be a dark day for our country if McCain is elected." Gilda lashed out at McCain's treatment of veterans: "McCain clearly is not a man of his word. Here is a veteran, a POW, who has voted against veterans benefits, cynically explaining that if you give them too many benefits they're going to leave the military. It is no mystery why so many military contributions go to Obama." Like the other families interviewed, Gilda's choice for president is influenced by her own loss. "For my family, this election has tremendous meaning. We lost our son, in essence, because the candidate that was chosen for us by the Supreme Court in 2000 was an incompetent."

Gilda added one last comment. "The American people are again faced with another opportunity to make their voices heard," she said. "Let us hope they reflect on whom they choose to lead the world."

Comments

[darlajane]

Please check out another blogger who lost his son in Iraq, John Scripsick.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/john-scripsick/what-did-my-son-die-for_b_128940.html

[readyfornewleadership]

They want you to shut up and go home. Why do you take this? You have already lost everything. I am surprised people aren't demonstrating in front of the white house everyday.

[MajMike]

I still can't believe Bush got away with not allowing folks to meet the returning bodies at the flightline per tradition. I know why he wanted this, less focus on the dead, but that WTP allowed this to go unchallenged was/is bullshit.

[jadeba]

Thank you for these interviews - it's so sad. Mc uses his military service but does nothing for vets and pow families. What kind of person is this? Certainly not the hero he'd like everyone to believe.

It seems he cannot count on the military vote this time - how will he and the repubs disenfranchise these folks? I would not be surprised.

[LizM]

Here is a thought for everyone to ponder...

If Joe Biden were President in 2002, he would have wanted and would have drafted a resolution much different from the October 2002 Iraq resolution authorizing the use of US military force AND he would have used it to AVOID war, not rush into it!

Questions, comments, insults?

[mentortfc]

I always wondered why families of fallen soldiers were so quiet and accepting. The ones that I saw on the news seems to support the war and believed that their loved ones died for the good of the country. I could never understand that. Now I know that for the most part, you have suffered in silence. I hope you really make your voices heard at the polls in such large numbers that no future president will even think about lying us into an unnecessary war.

[smh121]

The men and women who are serving now and who have died serving do (did) so for the America that
exists under the mess created by the self serving politicians and liars for the past 8 years. The America that believed in truth, fairness, opportunity and caring for the least among us and accepted responsibility for actions. It was/is not ideal and had/has it's problems and issues but the resolve to do what was right and needed to be done was there. The family and friends of our military - shoulder on gracefully with grace and dignity and deserve our respect and support. WE as American's owe it to
ourselves and those who are in harms way even as we speak to make clear choices that honor the men, women and families that serve.

[demfriend]

When McCain is painted as a military supporter I want to vomit violently. He hasn't doe very much in the way of "support" when you look at his voting record there are very few times on his record that show actual support. Almost all were againest better conditions for the troops and vets. if he was a "supporter" he should have been far more of our treatment facilities would have fallen into disrepair and filth. Our troops would not be homeless when no longer of service nor would they turn their weapons on themselves due to poor mental health care. He might have been labeled a hero for being a POW but he wasn't there by choice nor is his record available to see what he did beside record his anti american rant then. No copies available no records medical or service available to even have a clue what was done during that time. But when I read the stories as those above with parents so deep in their own loses I get angry at the Pentagon because they fail to be honest with the families when they lose a loved one and often the real story comes much later when someone mentions it who was there.

[Chago13]

I ask were are the TRUE patriots that could utter this words:

"Dear Madam: I have been shown in the files of the War Department a statement of the Adjutant-General of Massachusetts that you are the mother of five sons who have died gloriously on the field of battle. I feel how weak and fruitless must be any words of mine which should attempt to beguile you from the grief of a loss so overwhelming. But I cannot refrain from tendering to you the consolation that may be found in the thanks of the Republic they died to save. I pray that our heavenly Father may assuage the anguish of your bereavement, and leave you only the cherished memory of the loved and lost, and the solemn pride that must be yours to have laid so costly a sacrifice upon the altar of freedom. Yours very sincerely and respectfully, Abraham Lincoln."

and know in there hearts and minds that the country they lead is behind them and proud to have made such a justified sacrifice for their country.

I know these TRUE patriots we seek are out there. Will we too be TRUE patriots enough to elect them?

[schatsie]

Abe and Ike were real Republicans, it is so sad to see that party so corrupted and putrid.

[Chago13]

What has happened to this great coutry. Where are the TRUE patriots that made this country the brightest beacon of hope, compassion and prosperity it once was. How could we have been led down this disasterous path by those who claim to be the MOST patriotic, but time and time again have shown that their patriotism lays only on the amount of digits in their bank accounts and furthermore so disgracefuly at the expense of LIFE. YOUNG,HUMAN,LIVES who have been betrayed gravely when the willingness to defend and devotion to their country was used as a tool to lead them to peril. Unjustified by a war of choice and calculation rather than to defend the freedom and the true great ways of this country. How could we have lost our way and allow the parasites of this country to infect it with murderous, blinding and regretful greed, at the cost of humanity. We are better than this, aren't we? I refuse to accept that we aren't. I ask were have the great leaders and TRUE patriots that valued life and fought only to preserve what makes this country great by engagin only in necesarry wars to rid the world of the tyrrany and oppression that other wise would be imposed on us.

[Willow712]

My great grandmother lost a son in Pearl Harbor. The waves from this death have gone through our family for 60 years. You never really get over something like this, you just learn how to live with it.

Reading this article was heart wrenching. I feel so sorry for these people, some losing their only child. When I originally started doubting the war in Iraq, I hesitated for so long, thinking that if we just won this war, these soldiers would not have died in vain. I have come to see that they have died in vain, anyway. And before more of them die in vain, we need to get the heck out of there. Its bad enough that we are having such a hard time in Afghanistan, at least that is where the war should be. War is never good. The older I get, the more I realize it. And the older one gets, the more one realizes exactly how much those young soldiers have lost. So sad.

[schatsie]

that is the repugs for you... Protect the Unborn and to Hell with the rest...

[vietnamvetforobama]

I am ashamed that our nation, and most especially wartime veterans, did not protest Bush’s War as loudly as we did the War in Vietnam. By the thousands, we came home from Vietnam declaring “never again”. It was our obligation to think clearly and not be manipulated into a fruitless war. It was our obligation to insure that our children and grandchildren did not face the horrors of war, especially a war of choice. It is time for Peace. It is time to say no to John "Wayne" McCain who has yet to see a war he doesn’t like. My heart goes out to all the gold star and blue star families. I am sorry.

A Navy Corpsman, Vietnam 1970

[faith]

I am sitting here with cold chills. The comments each of these individuals made concerning their very personal, horribly tragic losses and their views concerning the upcoming presidential election and why it is so very important to vote with intelligence and thoughtfulness is nothing short of profound. Their words are so very true. I am hoping that the U.S.A. will vote with their brains and not their biases and elect Obama/Biden.

[rose london]

Iam so moved. My God bless and receive the Soul of who are resting with him. May we never forget this sacrifice by our brave men and women.

SHAME ON YOU MCCAIN..I REALLY MEAN THAT.SHAME ON YOU.

[faith]

Amen, rose london. I agree.

[BAVirago]

Puts McCain's dog tag stunt into perspective, doesn't it?

[bonitatortuga]

My heart is broken for the Gold Star Families that have lost loved ones in Iraq. It is an unbearable pain.

Blue Star Families are supporting Obama-Biden, and we have a website to help our fellow military families understand what is at stake in this election. The more than 30,000 troops that have been injured in the wars are coming home to Walter Reed and a lack of benefits to help them recover, not just physically but mentally. I would invite you all to visit the Blue Star Families at www.bsf4o.com.

And I would also invite you to support Iraq and Afghanistan Veterans of America at www.iava.org. This group is doing amazing things to help our surviving Vets to get the care they need and deserve.

[schatsie]

You all should walk into the BX and see the young man with NO LEGS and wonder if that is going to be your son soon....

You should walk into Walter Reed and see the faces of the Parents and the Soldiers....

You should walk down the street and wonder how many of the Homeless fought in Nam...

[schatsie]

This kink BSF4o.com does not seem to be working.

[bonitatortuga]

It is an acronym for Blue Star Families for Obama www.bsf4o.comm). You may have to cut and paste into your browser.