A roller coaster of pleasurable feelings that make it hard to even breathe? Or is it also evident in sarcasm, bickering, and sex on demand? You're kidding, right? That's not love. We don't need to be educated about what love is; you just know it. Or do you?
More than 1 million kids a year are affected by divorce; 60 percent are parents between the ages of 25 to 39. The love these couples demonstrate is the educational model their kids get for what this predominately misunderstood word represents.
It's undeniably confusing and incredibly unfortunate. We model what we see; we aim for what we believe is possible. Only we don't realize we haven't been given an education to know what a fulfilling experience is.
What we often find instead is the bad behavior of loveless couples whose treatment of each other is so unconscious there is not even the respect one would ask of a roommate. There are also couples who stay together solely for the "sake of their kids," "financial difficulties," or "religious beliefs" who don't increase their kids chances for knowing love even on the smallest scale.
Then we have the romantic love modeled in films and books that is so picture perfect the expectations it sets can only lead to miserable failure in your own life. Romantic relationships where two people depend on each other to make themselves whole don't last. In today's world, they can end as quickly as that realization becomes conscious, sometimes only days after marriage vows are spoken.
Can another human being ever give that "you complete me" experience for a lifetime? They might love you in every way possible, and yet if you make them responsible for when you feel loved and when you don't, you have placed a noose around their neck that can only tighten through time.
Expectations not met... communication not understood... personal lessons yet to be learned. When we look for love on the outside and we haven't walked the journey to find it within, we are asking for another to fill the emptiness inside.
The soul knows where to find true love; once the longing to know it becomes a conscious quest, it creates an insatiable thirst, seemingly to be in love, but actually it is to BE love, to know it to your core.
It is then still moments can educate you, as the alchemy of infinite love bubbles up from your heart and sends sensorial experiences of wholeness and delight throughout your body and mind. It takes courage to walk this path of discovery, as it can demonstrate where you have beliefs that block love's entry into your life. And yet, when you experience it, that knowledge never leaves you.
Imagine knowing love that will never walk out the door and that invites you to expand it in your life by sharing it with others. Two people who have been educated to share love like this might find that experience all lovers search for, that love where two become one. Maybe it's time to make love an educational requirement for us all.
For more by Marlise Karlin, click here.
For more on mindfulness, click here.
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