12/04/2012 09:23 am ET Updated Feb 03, 2013

Why 3D doesn't matter

After seeing Life of Pi and The Hobbit, whose 48-frame-per-second 3D is game-changing, according to some observers, it feels like the right time for my annual rant against 3D. Because 3D has become like the Borg, absorbing all into its ravening maw. Resistance is futile.

But I remain unconvinced of anything about 3D except this: that it doesn't matter. There is no demand for 3D, except from studios and exhibitors who benefit by jacking the price of tickets for 3D shows anywhere from $3-$5.

Because that, of course, is the third dimension: greed.

It's a way of ginning up revenues on mediocre action and animated films. It's also a way of squeezing a bit of revenue out of the catalog. Still, while I understand applying the retroactive 3D to something digital like Pixar's Monsters, Inc. or Finding Nemo, my heart sank when I saw a trailer for the 3D version of Jurassic Park.

But 3D doesn't matter.

It doesn't matter in the same way that computer-generated imagery doesn't matter. Tricks and gimmicks can only carry a film so far.

If there's not a script worth watching, then all of the digital diversions in the world won't convert trash to treasure. It's never worked for Michael Bay.

This commentary continues on my website.