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Marty Kaplan

Marty Kaplan

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Our Friend Pakistan and Other Mental Pretzels

Posted: 05/ 2/11 03:17 PM ET

On the same day that Americans are test-driving the idea that Osama bin Laden lived on the outskirts of Pakistan's West Point, undetected, for six years, Orly Taitz goes to the 9th Circuit Appeals Court to prove that President Obama's long-form birth certificate is a forgery.

As they say in conspiracy-land, there are no coincidences.

If you believe that Pakistan is our ally in the war on al Qaeda, then you have to square that belief with what we now know about bin Laden's last years. Maybe building a luxury compound in Abbottabad illustrates the brilliance of hiding in plain sight; surely no one in the Pakistani intelligence services could have been expected to look for him there. Or maybe they knew all along that someone who looked a lot like bin Laden lived in there, but it took half-a-dozen years to be certain he wasn't a fiendishly clever decoy. Or maybe they knew it was bin Laden, but the ISI, the IB and MI -- the three Pakistani intelligence agencies -- are like a country of their own, not to be conflated with the nation we call our ally.

Birthers, too, need to be mental contortionists to hold fast to their belief that the president is not a natural-born American. Not only do they have to include the White House and the state of Hawaii in the plot to issue counterfeit documents; they are also required to maintain that the Honolulu newspapers were co-conspirators nearly 50 years ago.

The world is rich with things hard to believe, but which nevertheless have passionate adherents. Creationists have to twist their minds into pretzels in order to dispatch geological evidence that our planet is billions, rather than thousands, of years old. If the Mayan calendar convinces you that the apocalypse will arrive in 2012, you will still be perfectly capable of rationalizing the arrival of an ordinary New Year's Day in 2013. If you believe that Paul Ryan's budget truly preserves and strengthens Medicare, then no appeal to the facts about health insurance companies and health care inflation will make a difference. If you think that cutting taxes for the wealthy spurs economic expansion, creates jobs and increases revenues, then you will be armed with an endless supply of exceptions to account for the actual economic record of the last 30 years.

Diplomacy, of course, is artful doubletalk. Everyone knows that "candid discussions" is a euphemism for trading accusations. Negotiators say one thing for domestic political consumption, but agree to the opposite under cover of secrecy. We tap one another's phones, but butter wouldn't melt in our diplomats' mouths.

We need Pakistan. We need them even if they complain about our drones in their airspace, even if they arrest our CIA operatives, even if they support the Afghan Taliban, even if they freed and lionize A. Q. Khan, who sold nuclear weapon designs to terrorist states. We also need China, even if their antagonism to human rights is appalling. We need Saudi Arabia, no matter what they do in Bahrain. Pursuing our interests is messy and contradictory; some of our interests turn out to be more important than others. That's what Realpolitik means.

If we had shared intelligence with Pakistan about our impending SEALS attack on bin Laden, the chances that it would not have leaked and been foiled are about zero. Pakistan knows that, just as it knows that the palaver about friendship and sovereignty is meant to conceal as much as it reveals. We're all in on the wink.

But I don't think that Orly Taitz is winking. Nor are religious fundamentalists. Where it gets hazy for me is the political fray. Do Michele Bachmann and Donald Trump actually believe the things they say, or are they just cynical manipulators who know how to get attention? When Newt Gingrich exonerates his extra-marital infidelity as a byproduct of his patriotism, is this Realpolitik at work, or does he actually think he's telling the truth? The Ryan budget, passed by House Republicans and now likely to be brought up for a vote in the Senate by Harry Reid, relies on unemployment falling below 3 percent, something that the United States has never achieved except briefly during the Korean War. When Paul Krugman points this out, do supporters of the Republican budget somehow rewire their neurons to prevent this information from reaching the part of their brain where facts are supposed to penetrate, or is evidence simply irrelevant, and everyone actually understands that "cutting the deficit" is just wink-wink code for punishing the unworthy poor?

The coming days will no doubt include many accounts of bin Laden's end. The administration's version will include some elegant evasiveness about the double game that Pakistan has been playing, but that doesn't bother me; Hillary Clinton is no Orly Taitz. I wish I could say that with certainty about the other doubletalkers in our midst.

This is my column from The Jewish Journal of Greater Los Angeles. You can read more of my columns here, and e-mail me there if you'd like.

 

Follow Marty Kaplan on Twitter: www.twitter.com/martykaplan

On the same day that Americans are test-driving the idea that Osama bin Laden lived on the outskirts of Pakistan's West Point, undetected, for six years, Orly Taitz goes to the 9th Circuit Appeals Cou...
On the same day that Americans are test-driving the idea that Osama bin Laden lived on the outskirts of Pakistan's West Point, undetected, for six years, Orly Taitz goes to the 9th Circuit Appeals Cou...
 
 
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Jody Dobis
09:35 AM on 05/03/2011
Love it or hate it, politics is about taking events and ideas that live in a gray world and turning them into a black and white issue. That hasn' t changed. What has changed over the last 10 or so years is the extent of fabrication and our acceptance of bald face lies that we have allowed as a serious discussion of the countries issues. We all need to re educate ourselves on the value and need for both facts and critical thinking. As a less than accomplished high school student at a very competitive school, I had and still do admire, those students that represented the so called cream-of-the-crop of our class. Education was emphasized as a gift unrelated to money or power which was considered side benefits at best. We need to return to the ideals that my high school instilled in me that a good education leads us to better understanding and decision making as it' s major reward. Only then can we have an informed elecorate that makes decisions overwhelmingly based on facts and reason rather than ignorance, fiction and prejudice.
05:26 AM on 05/03/2011
The -Liberal- hatred of the idea that real Americans are turning away from -Liberalism- because real Americans have seen the real damage done to America in the last fifty years. The "Liberal/Democratic/Republican Party" has caused such damage to our great country that we are no longer the greatest civilization in the history of the world. -Greed- and lack of -Dicipline- and lack of -Values- and lack of -God/Religion- etc. etc. etc. etc. etc. etc.? This means that we are not coming back from this train wreck called the -Liberal/Republican/DemocraticParty- may -God- have mercy on our souls for ruining the greatest country in the world that -He- gave us???
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Articulator
10:19 PM on 05/02/2011
"Do Michele Bachmann and Donald Trump actually believe the things they say, or are they just cynical manipulators who know how to get attention?"

It's clear how easily the base can be emotionally manipulated. That's all they need to know.
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MichaelGuy
Swiis Canton, Dutch Republic, advocate
11:39 PM on 05/02/2011
I believe they do and so do millions of American Citizens. Politics is a Bell Curve with various competing factions, ideologies, ideologies, religious beliefs and ethnicities. In this almost Medieval maelstrom we have a precariously unified, nationalist country. Politics is alos much like a religious belief, where each side sees themselves as Plato's enligtened philosopher king and the opposition as those evil, greedy or ignorant masses who prefer to only see the shadows on the cave wall as reality. One aprty'sessiah becomes the opposition's Anti-Christ. One ideology'y ideal of freedom may be the other's idea of a tyranny. Politics can give us an exaggerated sense of virtue and morality when juxtapositioned against another belief's evil and threats to freedom.
Since we don't have a realistic and viable 10th Amendment, whereby differing beliefs and ideologies can segregate and seperate and congregate into states with unique cultues, we have the constant, internecine squabbles between conservatives and liberals. Each side believes they are right and their adversaries are either ignorant or evil. Name calling or prideful contempt will only exacerbate the divide as each ideology tries to control the monolithic federal leviathan. In the end we are like children in the vack seat of God's car
So, yes my friends , as a Tea Party, John Locke Conservative I can attest Michelle Bachmann, Donald Trump, Herman Cain are held in high regard with esteem and credibility.Just as Move On, George Soros, and the progressive movement are reverred on the left.
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Jody Dobis
10:01 AM on 05/03/2011
Michael.. Love your use of Plato in your comment. Brought me back to my university freshman philosophy course discussions. On the subject at hand, we are unlike most civilizations that have come before us and will exist after. When we had healthy economic outcomes for a majority of Americans, secondary political issues that dominate our political discourse were on the last pages of the paper. The overall well being of our citizens alowed for the passage of the civil rights laws and other major legislature in the 1960's that made life a little more accepting of foreign thought and actions. Now with a precarious economy in which the poor and middle class is loosing ground each day, we are accepting ideas and values that would have been rejected as either false or ignorant back in the 60's. Until our economic output is more fairly shared, expect more movement into unsound solutions, false facts and continued blame on the weakest members of our society.
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Articulator
10:17 PM on 05/02/2011
Great article.

The right wingers naively think that diplomacy is when everyone sits in a circle and sings koombya. It is quite the opposite. It is when you learn, know, and work the nuances of who's who and work to gain leverage. They are still trying to figure out why we werent greeted as liberators. Cant we just ride into town with six guns blazing and everyone will fall at our knees because we are the moral ones and we can do anything moral or immoral because of it?

Sorry, It's slightly more complicated than that.
08:34 PM on 05/02/2011
As the late great comedian Will Rogers once observed, "It is not what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It is what you do know that just ain't so."
08:32 PM on 05/02/2011
I am amazed that one can still doubt whether Pakistani intelligence knew about Bin Laden's whereabouts. "He had a room in the presidential palace, but you know the president really didn't know who the guy was...". If that country didn't have nukes we wouldn't be pussyfooting around with them.
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SeaBlood
cynical about religion
06:31 PM on 05/02/2011
Of course these right wng types don't believe the lies they spout-----they are more intelligent than that. They do, however, practice a form of self hypnosis that allows them to "rewire' their mental apparatus to make it appear that they speak the truth-----they might even be able to pass a polygraph test while in their little trances.
06:11 PM on 05/02/2011
This is real-life political drama unfolding. I feel like I am in a David Wilson or James Patterson book reading all these articles and watching the news. This once again proves that Middle East politics and our involvement in it is nothing short of complicated.
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Chris Wundrow
06:04 PM on 05/02/2011
Blog is right on. That Pakistan is an untrustworthy ally is beyond question, given their past performance. If their intellegence had been let in on this operation, no question that someone would have tipped off Osama Bin Ladin. If Pakistan is complaining, let them complain away; ultimately we have to act in our own interest. Kaplan is absolutely right that we nonetheless need them and our other less than savory allies--it's a dirty world out there. Like the old saying goes, he who would have supper with the devil should bring a long spoon. Heard a good Churchill line this morning, too: The only thing worse than having allies is not having them.
05:36 PM on 05/02/2011
I understand what the American troops did was brave, but heroic? They murdered his wife, brother, son and countless others? Why did they have to die too and why is America so proud of this? You wanted the man, you should've caught him, you can't prove his family was as guilty as him, maybe they were oppressed by him and wanted out. Not death.
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tulsey
I was Bill Hicks.
06:33 PM on 05/02/2011
They all knew to. Nothing personal, just business.
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ThermoChemist
"Forewarned Is Forearmed"
08:35 PM on 05/02/2011
Michael Corleone: [to Sonny] It's not personal, Sonny. It's strictly business.
-- 1972 movie "The Godfather"

: )
08:04 AM on 05/03/2011
"They murdered his wife, brother, son and countless others?"

Yea, i am sure they were all sweet little innocents.
05:11 PM on 05/02/2011
I find it wonderful that people who profess to understand "Realpolitik" still cling to the belief that America is a Democracy, or that the massive, overfunded-theatre that we call the Elected Representatives still even matter. Wise up. As much as all countries understand that Diplomacy is an exercise in double-facedness, all PEOPLE must understand that Democracy in the age of the industrialist is just the same. And yet they come up with all sorts of arguments as to why a multi-trillion-dollar Military-Industrial Complex would allow a popularly elected ruler to actually make real decisions.

Let's get one thing straight: Obama didn't give the order. He was informed of the decision, and it is his job to be the Face. Would be no different under any other "Elected Leader" of any party, color, or stripe. The President's job is to hold Easter Egg hunts, give speeches, raise money, and be a figure for the masses to behold.
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momosity
Liberal Since In-Utero
04:57 PM on 05/02/2011
But of course! Obama does something the Bush administration couldn't/wouldn't do, and it's all a politically motivated conspiracy. Give it up; Osama bin Laden is dead because Americans finally got wise that Pakistan was involved in hiding him. That requires INTELLIGENCE, something that was sorely lacking during the Bush/Cheney years.
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frank day
Republican = FAIL
04:44 PM on 05/02/2011
I guess 'truthiness' is the best we can expect these days.
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tulsey
I was Bill Hicks.
06:39 PM on 05/02/2011
I am in lockstep with Colbert.
04:00 PM on 05/02/2011
U.S. armed forces will remain in Afganistan forever. Why? To protect Pakistani nuclear weapons and to make sure 'The Pipeline' gets built. The first reason has to do with national security. The second falls under the heading of Corporate Support. The assasination of Osama Bin Laden was a political move. Just like Libya is.
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tulsey
I was Bill Hicks.
06:41 PM on 05/02/2011
It's the "Caspian Basin, Oil Supply Blues."
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ThermoChemist
"Forewarned Is Forearmed"
08:40 PM on 05/02/2011
"U.S. armed forces will remain in Afghanistan forever. Why?"
==========

Don't forget the vast mineral deposits that were "discovered" last year..!

-- U.S. Identifies Vast Mineral Riches in Afghanistan
http://www.nytimes.com/2010/06/14/world/asia/14minerals.html

-- U.S. Discovers $1T in Afghan Mineral Deposits
http://www.foxnews.com/world/2010/06/14/discovers-t-minerals-afghanistan/

-- Afghanistan sits on $1 trillion mineral m0therlode
http://www.abc.net.au/news/stories/2010/06/15/2926822.htm