Iran, Are you Serioulsy Suing for CIA Coup?

08/30/2013 12:51 pm ET | Updated Oct 30, 2013

Dear Iran,

Let me be the first to congratulate you on joining the international community, and taking to the courts to air your grievances, rather than the streets where you usually settle the score.

Second, as a child of the 1979 revolution which I didn't support, and the daughter of a family that fled your violent protests leading up to the revolution -- loosing everything in the process, I am now wondering if I have a Cause of Action along with the millions of other expatriates who escaped your angry claws. Come to think of it, your brutal revolution overthrew the government of another ruler we referred to as "the shah", remember him? His eldest daughter and son (who would be king) are still around. I wonder if they're calling their lawyers as we speak.

You see one man's loss is usually another man's gain, as they saying goes. So while in your eyes, your glorious revolution was a good thing, I know millions of Iranians out there who would disagree. Many of them were harmed by this revolution -- whether physically, emotionally or monetarily. I wonder if I should reach out to them and form a "class" to file a Class Action law suit and recover for decades of pain and suffering, lost opportunity, and damages for lost employment in a country that was decidedly on the march to modernity, with plenty of unrealized opportunity for my generation.

While many of us did not support your hostile take-over of our secular form of government in 1979, we went out quietly still watching over our shoulder as we witnessed your revolutionaries dole out a brutal brand of IRI retribution to all who were a threat to your new order. We were petrified, but still dignified. We gave you and your kind the right to believe in your brand of Islam, and figured if the masses -- the all important people -- of our nation were out in droves demanding change, who were we to stop them? We humbly packed our bags, and if you allowed us, left the country -- leaving the reins to you.

It is not lost on us that you utterly failed your nation and your people. It has not gone unnoticed for us that your brand of ideological governance has led Iran from the world stage to its current rogue status, while driving the economy into the ground and racking up human right abuses that are only paralleled by Communist China.

As women, we are woefully aggrieved at your treatment of us. We mourn the losses of our civic and legal rights in the last thirty-something years since the revolution. The women of Iran have long protested the mandatory wearing of Islamic head garb, which is brutally enforced on the streets by your ideological thugs. We are equally disenchanted by our treatment under your new laws. We cannot retain custody of our children in a divorce, we cannot travel without the consent of a male (who presumably has a possessory right to us), and we inherit only half of what our brothers do. Further, our testimony in your courts carries only half the weight of a man. All this deprives us of some of our human rights, and leaves us as a gender class, discriminated under your laws. Do you think the International Court will hear our grievances?

I ask because now that you have taken to the courts with your more than half-a-century old complaint of wrong doing by the Americans toward a government that probably wouldn't have supported your current ideology anyway, I wonder if you have lawyers ready to defend the veritable panacea of law suits that your action may give rise to? I know I suddenly feel more aggrieved than ever, and must thank you for giving me this great idea: to take my 30-something year old grievances, borne out of the natural course of history, and beg a court to listen to me. Heck I think my law degree might finally come to good use -- I'll find every population group that was ever wronged by the events of history and see if we can find a court to listen. I'll start maybe with the 43 American hostages you held for more than a year and see if they are inspired by you to take up a Cause of Action. Or perhaps the people of Syria are looking for legal representation to file suit against you for your support of the Assad regime, who seems unrequitedly to be pummeling them from land and sky.

There's no telling where this slippery slope may lead...