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Maryjane Fahey
Maryjane Fahey is the co-author of DUMPED, a breakup bible for women to get off their asses and over their exes in record time. Fall 2012. Find, tweet, facebook, whatever them.. they’re very friendly...

Entries by Maryjane Fahey

What It's Like To Finally Date A Grown-Up

(12) Comments | Posted February 11, 2016 | 4:58 AM

"You're the oldest man I've been out with in 15 years."

"You're the oldest woman I've been out with in 17 years."


And that was how our affair started 13 months ago to the day.

In a blog I'd written for The Huffington Post last...

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10 cose che non dovreste mai fare dopo la fine di un rapporto

(4) Comments | Posted January 26, 2016 | 7:42 AM

Sapete già come funziona, ragazze. Non vi faremo perdere tempo prezioso dicendovi cose che già capite da sole come "non andarci più a letto", "non chiamare sua madre per lamentarti di lui", "non pensate di poter essere già amici". Ma ci sono altri rischi di "autosabotaggio" durante il delicato periodo...

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What Is It About Sarah Jane Adams? ... A Very Unlikely Instagram 'Star' At 60

(5) Comments | Posted October 16, 2015 | 7:39 AM

Sarah Jane Adams (AKA Saramaijewels) has 40,000 followers on Instagram. Ok, not 104,000 like Kim Gordon, not 4 million like Madonna ... but still ... she has 40,000 obsessive Instagram fans ... and I'm one of them. I've started a friendship with this pal -- yes, I called her a...

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7 Reasons We Need To Bury The Playboy Bunny

(2) Comments | Posted April 3, 2015 | 10:28 AM


The Easter Bunny Bonanza is upon us ... baskets of delectable bunnies everywhere: milk chocolate bunnies, caramel bunnies, marshmallow bunnies, foil wrap bunnies stuffed with god-knows-what and, it seems, Playboy Bunnies. Ex-Playboy Bunnies, to be more precise. They're in the early...

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My Year Of Tindering Dangerously

(10) Comments | Posted January 16, 2015 | 4:54 AM

I'm a lazy shopper. Always have been. I like owning things. Hate shopping for them.

I don't return items. I give them to cool friends if the goods are great -- but just look lousy on me. I have been known, however, to give wrong items -- very wrong...

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ON THE ROAD AGAIN -- 50+ Solo + Lovin' It!

(3) Comments | Posted September 9, 2014 | 7:13 AM


It's a jolt to be called "Ma'am" the first time. And it still sucks the 223rd time. Ouch...a realization nobody needs to be reminded of. The thoughts that follow, I promise, are not yet another "homage" to the "I look better at 50...

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Lying On Your Profile, Texting Post-Sex and Other Signs You Might Be a RUDE Online Dater

(7) Comments | Posted May 20, 2013 | 2:10 PM

I'm on an Internet "cocktail" date. I give these first encounters no more than an allotted 26 minutes. That's my rule which, of course, I have merrily broken in the past. But generally... a cup of java and I'm out. Tonight, it's booze -- 'cause it's Thursday and he amused...

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7 Ways to Spring Clean Your Toxic Mating Habits

(11) Comments | Posted March 7, 2013 | 11:38 AM

According to every single woman's magazine on newsstands today, it's spring cleaning time. If I see another article on de-cluttering, I'm gonna go crazy. I won't deny, however, that the hints of fresh spring breezes wafting through my window does invite some kind of a REFRESH. My mess of a...

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If 'Dear Abby' Gave the Girls of HBO's 'Girls' Some Advice...

(11) Comments | Posted February 4, 2013 | 7:00 AM

What follows is DUMPED's homage to the "Dear Abby" columnist, Pauline Phillips, who left this planet in January of 2013. Imagine if HBO's 'Girls' coming to her for advice, self-involved and dealing with their problematic Brooklyn lives and needing a bit of her most uncommon common sense...

Dear Abby,


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12 Sex Resolutions To Ring In 2013 With A "Bang"

(12) Comments | Posted December 28, 2012 | 9:34 AM

After being single for about six months, I finally came alive again, and by alive, I mean ... alive down there. After my breakup, I thought I'd never want to have sex again. My libido, along with my record collection and art books, got lost in the shuffle. Months went...

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How To Survive The Couple-Happy Holidays: 7 Tips For The Newly Single

(10) Comments | Posted November 29, 2012 | 9:01 AM

Well, ladies, the holidays are upon us. And you just made it through Thanksgiving... perhaps solo for the first time in years. Not so easy, is it?

Hopefully, you didn't make the same mistakes I did on that first feast without my "other half."


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Break Up Recovery: The Flowchart

(32) Comments | Posted October 24, 2012 | 2:02 PM

Getting over a break up? You've got one of two ways to go -- you can either be a cryin', whinin' mess or an empowerment babe! Lucky you, we've made a handy-dandy do's-and-don'ts infographic (we know how much you love these babies). Avoid the pitfalls of the DON'TS on the left hand side...

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Closure and Other Catastrophes:
10 Commandments for Breaking Up

(22) Comments | Posted September 19, 2012 | 11:01 AM

Closure is an illusion, ladies. Closure after a breakup simply does not exist. Take it from me...

I got dumped over the phone after a seven-year relationship -- blindsided, actually. So I was desperate for some kind of closure. I just wanted to friggin' understand what went wrong. Really... we're...

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NO Sex = NO Relationship

(82) Comments | Posted August 27, 2012 | 8:36 AM

The hottest nine years of my adult carnal life were spent being somebody's "side dish." Don't feel sorry for me. He was my piece on the side, too -- and, much like lobster mac and cheese, was he ever delicious. 26 years older then me, he was wildly successful, sophisticated,...

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Top 13 Red Flags In A Relationship

(11) Comments | Posted July 25, 2012 | 4:42 PM

The dissolution of TomKat's marriage is old news by now, but you can't help but wonder about all the waving neon flags that Cruise managed to miss. I mean, talk about getting blind-sided -- and all so publicly.

Alas, Tom Cruise isn't the first to have been duped. Remember the...

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Breakups: 10 Things You Should Never, Ever Do After

(78) Comments | Posted July 3, 2012 | 10:22 AM

You know the biggies already, Folks. We're not going to waste your valuable skimming time telling you things you already understand, like: don't sleep with him anymore, don't call his mother to complain about him and don't mistake him for a "pal" just yet. But there are lots of other...

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Top 8 Dating Red Flags for Real-Life Single Girls

(72) Comments | Posted May 15, 2012 | 10:30 AM

It was Mother's Day, and my maternal instincts were outed yet again as I watched another episode of Girls. I squirm with recognition as I watch Hannah chase the forever unavailable Adam ... unavailability being the key lure here. I know these girls. I am surrounded by them...

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An Oscar-Themed Open Letter to Demi Moore

(6) Comments | Posted February 28, 2012 | 12:26 PM

Dear Demi,

Your breakup with Ashton is old news by now. Whether you dumped him, or he dumped you -- no matter. The man behaved shabbily and now -- hey -- you're on your own again.

The Oscars were Sunday night, and I had you, your career, and your...

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The "Absolutely Fabulous" Woman Who Showed Me The Way

(0) Comments | Posted January 9, 2012 | 5:54 PM

You can keep your Carrie and Samantha. I'm going drinking with Patsy and Edina. They're baaaaaack! Who wouldn't prefer these two hilarious, cocktail swizzlin', vacuous broads! No mention or need for men or chidren- they got each other, shopping and booze. BINGO!

Eight years later the gang's all back, funnier...

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