THE BLOG

Featuring fresh takes and real-time analysis from HuffPost's signature lineup of contributors

Matt Titus Headshot

It's About the Relationship Stupid

Posted: Updated:

I don't spend a lot of time worrying about politics, I have my opinions and hopes about the country and where it should go in the next number of years, but quite frankly, I also know at the end of the day nobody cares what a matchmaker thinks about the economy or health care.

But I do have a pretty good idea about what makes a man and woman tick, and my brain just won't stop turning about this election. Of course it's everywhere, I think it's getting better ratings than America Idol, now that's sayin' something... because men are such visual creatures, I view Barack and Hillary at first glance like this, with Mr. Obama I picture him and his wife and kids playing in the park, with Mrs. Clinton I picture Monica Lewinsky on her knees in the Oval Office. I can't help it, it's how I see it.

Lets try a simple word association. Ready.. Hillary: Reckless Ambition.... Barrack: Positive Change. Still seem too opinionated and harsh? Ok, ok, I agree...

It's not even because she's a woman, hell, I would welcome a female president, I work exclusively with women everyday, they're smarter than men, trust me. In my personal view this whole current political battle is about good and bad relationships. Relationships and how to find, navigate and nurture them is my business, as a matter of fact my new book Why Hasn't He Called? is based on the subject. Sorry to self promote for a second, but it is my first book!

When it is all said and done the true identity of who we are is depicted most accurately in the way in which we interact with those whom are dearest to our hearts. In most cases our actions towards our significant others are driven on relaxed , knee jerk emotional responses, not what appear to be strategic, contractual obligations.

I work with many women who've been the victims of infidelity, it's not a happy moment looking into their frightened and broken faces as they describe how they felt when they first learned that they were cheated on. Full disclosure, I was married once before, I did it all wrong, and lost it all. But I wasn't caught, I confessed, I gave my ex-wife everything and set her free, by saving her from anymore pain, I saved myself. I became a student of relationships; I learned what real honesty was about and what real love meant. And I can tell you as an "expert" on the subject you can't be a happy couple if your only bond is a decades old contract built on consolidated power and endless denial.

America is hurting inside, we've been hurting since 2001, something is off, and we need a hero, we need some hope. And I see a glimpse of hope when it comes to Barack Obama, I also see a human being, flesh and blood, wrongs made right. Do I agree with all his policy ideas and political impulses, but there is something about the way he looks at his wife, Michelle, it feels like real love. We don't always get that with the past inhabitants of the White House, we get this kind of icy chill when we see them profess their passion for each other. Every time Bill goes out there to "defend my wife", he's really just defending himself. If he really wanted to help her, he'd make himself scarce, let her do the heavy lifting and run the race as a powerful woman. But because of a splintered relationship, he can't let go. Hillary is not an unintelligent woman, far from it. She actually deserves the chance to prove her worth, if she did from the start of her campaign she might of already won the nomination.

Once a man cheats on his wife he feels guilty, he tries to make things "right", I know I did. Throw in an often debated presidential legacy and you've got relationship quicksand, and America needs solid ground to stand on with the next presidential administration, not quicksand.

Now, I've heard people attack Barack Obama's lack of specifics, but since when does hope and promise need footnotes? Obama's main crime seems to be that he's "young and naïve", didn't they say that about Bill when HE was running for position of the leader of the free world? We want the next president to live his or HER life by the simple cornerstone of our country, which is the American family and it's moral code. Now "moral code" is not something you can discount. If we know that the core of a relationship is frayed, if the vows of matrimony have been long ago replaced by an oath of political partnership how can we trust it? Our relationships describe who we are, every single one of my clients yearns for a relationship that will reward them, inspire them and fulfill them.

Nowadays it would seem, America does too.

From Our Partners