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The Atheist in the Closet

Posted: 06/16/11 04:46 PM ET

Who has the bigger closet, gays or atheists?

Since writing and directing The Ledge, a film with an atheist lead, I've been going to more atheist events. At the American Atheist's conference in Iowa a few weeks ago, I found myself drinking with a couple of prison guards, a world-famous physicist, a female department store "loss prevention specialist" who used to be a Humvee driver in the Marines, a Turkish-American linguistics student, a guy who started an enormous video game company, and a couple of soldiers. There were a lot of soldiers. Of the thousand attendees, well over a hundred were either military or ex-military personnel.

I also met a large number of closeted atheists.

It sounds almost comic, I know, but if you've spent as much time as I have meeting religious people in small-town America, it's easy to imagine what "outing" yourself as an atheist could mean in such a place. 70% of Americans believe in hell. They think you'll go there if you're an atheist, and some are not shy about giving you a taste of it now in order to "save" you from it later. Listening to the painful stories of atheists who did come out reminded me of all the stories I've heard from gay friends in similar circumstances.

I know this analogy might offend some gay people. Homosexuality is no longer considered -- at least among the informed -- a choice anymore; but is your philosophy a matter of choice either? I know that for me it is literally impossible to believe in any of the gods on offer, and as Thomas Paine wrote, "It is necessary to the happiness of man that he be mentally faithful to himself."

The comparisons between atheists and gays in America is numerically apt too. According to a Pew Forum poll, 4% of Americans identify as atheist or agnostic, while exit polls in the last general election found 4% of Americans identify as gay, lesbian, or bisexual. In both cases these percentages are probably lower than the truth. In the Pew Forum poll, for instance, a further 12.1% wrote "none" when asked what religion they held, and in most polls on sexual preference, many straight people admit they've had a few gay encounters here and there. This is, I believe, what's called "a wide stance."

Whatever the size of these two unfortunate closets, the atheist one is less known but arguably more uncomfortable and justified. Popular culture -- music, movies, TV, (and need I mention the Broadway musical?) -- is littered with positive gay characters, while all atheists have in the mainstream is Gregory House in (weirdly) Fox's House, and Bill Maher on the excellent Real Time. There are more out gays in Congress than atheists, and for good reason. A 2007 Gallup poll found that 55% of Americans would consider voting for a homosexual presidential candidate but only 45% would do the same for an atheist.

Numerous studies have shown that atheists tend to be better educated and more tolerant than believers, but even so... why such antipathy when we have more in common than not? Atheists don't believe in unprovable gods who are frequently cruel and often ludicrous. Believers believe exactly the same thing -- except when it comes to their own god or gods. Christian, are thought to represent about 30% of the world's believers so they are atheist about the other 70%. Atheists go the whole way, but really, what's a 30% difference among friends?

Can atheists narrow this gap and reduce the antipathy? Only if they learn from the gay rights movement that the first step toward acceptance is the one that takes you out of the closet, hard though it may be.

And there couldn't be a better time. Obama acknowledged non-believers in his acceptance speech. The Book Of Mormon just won nine Tony Awards and is doing great business. And my film, The Ledge, a thriller with an outspoken atheist lead, is already doing exceptionally well on VOD and comes out in theaters in New York and Los Angeles on July 8th. So maybe it won't take as long as we think for people "of faith" to stop making life hard for gays and atheists and instead encourage them to openly contribute their considerable talents to this country.

God-fearing straight men have had a monopoly for a very long time, and many peculiar decisions have been made.

Matthew Chapman is the great-great-grandson of Charles Darwin, author of two books, and writer and director of the new film 'The Ledge' starring Liv Tyler, Charlie Hunnam, Terrence Howard, and Patrick Wilson.

 
 
 
 
 
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01:24 PM on 07/14/2011
Hey!! I'm not Scared and Trying to ComeOut Here, but, never seem to get Posted?!! LoL!!
Help Me OUT!! (um.....don't mind the mask...it is really me behind it....hehehe!)
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09:19 AM on 07/11/2011
ComeOn People!! Stand Up for your Rights Now! Seriously you need to have an ounce of Courage to get out of that Closet and Live a Full Life! You are Worth It! (uh....don'tmindtheicon.....hehehe!)
07:42 PM on 07/09/2011
I am one of those people who are very proud to be an atheist. I didn't spend that much time in the closet at all and yes, I got outed from a lot of family functions and I am judged on a daily basis. It doesn't really bother me. I know the truth and I am not afraid of speaking it. Especially when it comes to my son. If I decided to stay in the closet, he would have been taught the same way I was and I can't have that. BE LOUD AND BE PROUD FOR OUR FUTURE GENERATIONS!!!
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azatrox
One of those "fake" Americans
02:18 AM on 07/04/2011
Sorry folks, I am only peeking out of the closet now, and it will probably stay that way for a while. Living in the southern U.S., I just do not want to risk violence towards my children by those good christians. Even in the South, where homophobia is part of the way of life, people would be more accepting of a gay person who came out of the closet than an atheist (and if you're gay AND atheist...well, consider moving).
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Stanley Seay
Beware of Dogma
09:16 PM on 07/05/2011
Not me, I'm directly in the bible belt and I've been openly Atheist for a long time. It is even more important to be out in areas that are the least tolerant. If everyone avoids the jeers and protests of the believers we will never make headway. It's the only way to dispense with the hatred and contemptuous nature of religion.
11:12 PM on 07/01/2011
In my late 20s, I decided to get serious about my faith and read the Quran to become a better Muslim, certain I would find the answers to all my questions. I got quite a reputation for being a devout believer. The more I read, the clearer it became that it was a MacGuffin, each Muslim is certain it contains whatever their idea of perfection is, yet many have never actually read it. I was raised to revere a book none of us could actually read, let alone understand because of the language barrier. A few members of my family flipped out when they found out I was an atheist (I had only told one person who blurted it out to one and all - more because she thought it wasn't a big deal rather than out of anything negative). After a short while, when they saw that my character hadn't changed in any fundamental way (I've always been a skeptic), they came around. While I don't have a problem telling strangers or family members that I am an atheist, I do shy away from it when it comes to people in our social circle - it wouldn't be just me they would judge harshly, it would affect my family...and I don't think that would be fair to them. But I am honest when anyone comes to me for religious advice.
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Stanley Seay
Beware of Dogma
09:20 PM on 07/05/2011
If they reject you because of your beliefs, or lack thereof, then they were never your friends to begin with. Acquaintances come and go all the time, but friends stick with you even when they don't agree with you all the time. I’d much rather have only one true friend than thousands of posers pretending to be my friend.
09:24 PM on 06/30/2011
Atheists shouldn't keep trying to force their views on everyone else.
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02:11 AM on 07/02/2011
yah, I'm tired of them knocking on my door every sunday morning and preaching at me too!
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Dorothy Moody
Secular Humanist, Independent, Goofball
11:13 PM on 07/07/2011
That's how you perceive it, but that's because you believe that a magical being created this entire world just for you. We don't want to force our views on anyone, we just want to stop hearing about yours.
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rolodex
Now my micro-bio is not empty.
02:03 AM on 06/30/2011
Atheists in the media? Besides Maher and House, you have a lovely character in Dr. Brennen in Bones (not known if actress Emily Deschanel is an atheist or not), and in the news you now have self professed "agnostic" Cenk Uygur on MSNBC's early evening lineup.
06:23 PM on 08/02/2011
Much as I love House and Bones, they depict atheists as hyper-rational emotional cripples. Not regular people.
That's not me, nor anyone I know.
03:58 PM on 06/25/2011
As a long time supporter of gay rights, the last thing I'd want to do is suggest that the kinds of suffering gays and atheists have to endure are the same. I grew up with a gay uncle who has now been with the same man for over fifty years. Their relationship was the best example of love I had as a child. For much of their relationship being gay in England meant you faced a potential thirty years in prison if it became publicly known. This monstrous religiously motivated, government sanctioned cruelty to and oppression of two people I loved so much was a large part of what made me an atheist. Perhaps I was too glib in the article, and if so I apologize. I was really just trying to point to the sad fact that both groups still have closets in which large numbers still hide because of prejudice, that atheists actually seem to be more disliked than the LGBT community, and that the gay rights movement can teach atheists a lot. I hope I live long enough to find out which gets elected first, a gay president or an atheist one. Who knows, we might get both at the same time.
02:24 AM on 06/25/2011
"Whatever the size of these two unfortunate closets, the atheist one is less known but arguably more uncomfortable and justified."

I thoroughly disagree, though I wouldn't argue the homosexual one is any more uncomfortable and justified. Instead, I think the two are incomparable (as far as comfort and justification are concerned) because, amongst other reasons, in many parts of the United States the implications of being "out" associated with each are significantly different.

For example - and please feel free to correct me if I'm wrong - upon coming out of the closet, an atheist has no rights (explicitly, at least) taken away from them simply because of their disbelief. However, a homosexual is in particular often denied the right to marriage (domestic partnership, civil union, or otherwise), an expression of love which is, in my gay opinion, very much the pinnacle of homosexuality. Visitation rights, adoption, the ability to make medical decisions for a partner, and so on are all legally disallowed for homosexual couples in some parts of the United States. Additionally, each of these rights are directly connected to what functionally makes them homosexual.

While the closets may be similar in some ways, the consequences of coming out of them can be quite different, so, having been in both, I personally don't think the atheist closet is any more uncomfortable or unjustified than the homosexual closet is, as I don't think the homosexual closet is any more those things than the atheist closet is. They're just different.
11:34 AM on 06/26/2011
I'm one of those people that had the opportunity to come out of both closets - I'm a bisexual atheist.

When it comes to which one would be easier to admit, I've often found that my sexual orientation was much easier than my religious preferences. This may not be everyone's experiences, and I most certainly attribute my challenges to living in the BIble Belt as well. As it stands, I live in a relatively liberal, though still very republican city, but one that is gay friendly all the same. People generally keep their LGBT prejudices to themselves.

I've not come out of the atheist closet at all in most of my social circles. The damage is too great. While it's true that it is most definitely illegal to discriminate against me for my religious preferences, and a legal gray area to discriminate against me for dating a woman, people seem to have no problem stating that they'd fire or not hire a person based on which church they attend - much less the fact that they don't attend church at all.

I'm grateful to have never been physically intimidated for either trait of mine, and perhaps I'm lucky in that I'm a woman, and lesbians are a trendy thing nowadays. But, I really have to say, being atheist is by far the harder thing to deal with for me, even as I struggle navigating this world with my girlfriend.
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DangerousTalk
National Atheist Examiner - http://exm.nr/j1EA0c
02:35 PM on 06/24/2011
Great article! I look forward to seeing The Ledge.
05:29 PM on 06/22/2011
First off I recommend that people see "The Ledge" because it is a great movie and worth the 10.00 to rent for 24 hours on the website. The more people see this movie on the website, the more convincing it will be that the movie will perform well with a wider release. If you are looking for deep philosophical reasons to be an atheist you might have to look for them elsewhere. But from a visceral perspective this movie does a great job conveying the atheist position from an emotional angle I haven't seen. This is why I feel it has the potential to reach a wide audience.

It is important to come out as atheists. Further, we must understand the sheer absurdity of how there is even a term for "not" having a belief in something. The absurdity is clear because we also recognize how those that don't believe in unicorns don't have to declare themselves a-unicornists. To justify their claim, the theist always has obligation to demonstrate the truth of their positive claim, not the other way around. There is no justifiable reason why god belief is granted nearly universal exception to philosophical burden of proof.
11:25 PM on 06/20/2011
This is an essential article for all atheists. It makes me glad that I am already out of the closet about my unbelief. I am sure that there are friends and family members that are unaware of this. Many probably still think that I am a Christian. Matthew Chapman will help many with these words. I also wish that the article will encourage everybody to see The Ledge as soon as possible. I have seen it and it is well worth it, The question, "What would you die for?", is asked and answered. You may not like the ending, but it does have an enjoyable journey.
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deluk
hot mess...
08:26 AM on 06/20/2011
Only in America!
06:52 AM on 06/24/2011
Right! As someone outside of the US it is just bewildering to see someone talk about Atheists being hard done by!
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azatrox
One of those "fake" Americans
02:11 AM on 07/04/2011
Saying you're an atheist here in the U.S. is the absolute best way to get ostracized by most of society. Even with the vast amount of homophobia here, people will be more accepting of you if you came out and declared you are gay (even in the southern US, where I live). But if you declared you are an atheist, there would be virtually no acceptance except by your fellow agnostics/atheists.
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ArjenBoatsma
No such thing as too much coffee.
11:34 PM on 06/19/2011
"There were a lot of soldiers. Of the thousand attendees, well over a hundred were either military or ex-military personnel."

What happened to a favorite argument of christians (at least I've only heard it from christians) that "there are no atheists in foxholes"?
11:38 AM on 06/26/2011
Like most Christian arguments, it's completely false. That's not to say that Christians aren't clinging hard to it - look up the Rock Beyond Belief event to see the controversy going on at Fort Bragg, North Carolina. It's modeled after a similar Baptist convention held recently called "Rock the Fort" yet has been denied access to the base twice, despite the fact that a soldier living on base is the primary organizer. About a month ago, a Ft Bragg chaplain retired and then wrote the organizers a scathing letter about how he is proud to prevent the heathen attitudes from consuming that base and that he will now contribute money towards the chaplaincy there to help them to continue to deny their right to assemble.
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Stanley Seay
Beware of Dogma
09:46 PM on 07/05/2011
The claim that they were denied access is not entirely true. However, they were denied monetary support from the Chaplaincy that supplied quite a bit of cash to the Rock The Fort event. However, it’s arguable that those funds came from the pockets of believers that gave as the plate was passed around, so to speak. MWR (Morale, Welfare, and Recreation) was very willing to support a secular event provided that like ALL potential events, you have to bring in at least a certain amount of attendees in order to qualify for their monetary support.

I know this for a fact, because I'm the person that made the initial phone call to MWR about the idea for a secular event taking place on base.
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Redlion62
Cable, Telephony, HSI Specialist
11:16 PM on 06/19/2011
I realized at the young age of 10 that religion wasn't real. It seemed to me that all the church really wanted was as much money as I could get out of my parents to give them. I have been outspoken about my atheism ever since. This did cause me some problems with other kids; even some fights. I think most people who are believers have some doubts about their religion; that's why some of them get so upset when somebody doesn't share their lunacy. There isn't a shred of proof about religions claims but, there is a lot of evidence that religion is a scam created by men. Religion is for those who cannot handle reality.