10/13/2010 12:31 pm ET | Updated Nov 17, 2011

Our Hypocrisy with Honesty

Many would agree that we, as a society, tout that we value Honesty (i.e. George Washington and 'Honest Abe', Abraham Lincoln -- "I cannot tell a lie") -- that is, of course, unless the consequences of the truth are too uncomfortable to take! And what price do we pay for this hypocrisy?

A government inquiry of 15 for-profit colleges found four cases in which campus officials encouraged applicants to commit fraud and examples at every school of officials lying about or misrepresenting their programs.

Deepak Chopra once said that a leader is a reflection of the consciousness of their people. I thought about this during President Clinton's 'sex scandal'. Many felt that his dishonesty was justified or at least acceptable. "Everyone lies, especially politicians!" One person even commented to me that the public was responsible for Clinton's dishonesty, since they would have condemned him if he had told the truth!

Our Judicial system is not based on honesty, but rather strategy. We all have our personal opinions about O.J. Simpson

Some will debate that there are times and circumstances when honesty is not the best policy; that white lies can avoid hurting people's feelings (such as when a husband is asked by his wife if her new pants make her look fat!)

Our culture perpetuates the myth that we can keep certain information from others "What they don't know won't hurt them." For example, spouses who have affairs, and the little things we don't discuss about ourselves because we are embarrassed about them. We live in a society where we are encouraged to lie, yet state that we value honesty.

So, I ask, price do we pay for this hypocrisy?

When we think a thought, speak, or take action, we create an energetic effect. This energy may be invisible, but it is very real. We can even measure the energy our thoughts produce with an EEG. We all respond to other's energy, whether we are aware of it or not. For example, we know when someone behind us is looking at us by feeling the flow of their energy towards us (don't we turn around to see who it is?) We also know what others are thinking, feeling, and doing. We just have to know how to pay attention to their energy, and they, in turn, will know the same about us!

If we hear a tone, and then another tone is played that is discordant, there is a clash of sound that actually hurts our ears. This discordance between truth and what we say or do creates an energetic clash that we all feel!

Whether we hide information from others through lying or omission, we are fooling ourselves if we think they don't know! If we could see the energy fields that emanate from us when we lie (and some people can!), we would see a clash. (We may have to check in with "The Mentalist" on this!)

In fact, we are actually harming ourselves when we are dishonest or hiding things, (i.e. being out of alignment with our values). This discordance at the very least creates stress in our physical system. Lie detector tests work by measuring this stress response.

We pay a great price by acting in conflict with our values. It erodes our sense of self esteem and integrity, it generates anxiety and fear (what if we get caught in a lie?) and the stress of it all affects our health. It disrupts our balance on all levels: physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual. If there is enough discordant energy within us, it can even manifest in illness. What if cancer is a result of energetic discordance in our bodies? Cancer is a disruption in the way our cells multiply and grow, so what if this energetic discordance interferes with the orderliness of our cell growth?

Imagine what life would be like if we were open and told the truth all the time. How different would our lives be?

It's refreshing (and a relief) for me to admit that I am not perfect and to acknowledge when I feel insecure. When I tell the truth, people seem to be more accepting of me. Life becomes simpler and easier when I don't feel the need to pretend I am someone I am not.

I strive daily to be more open and honest. At times it becomes uncomfortable. When I remember that all that I think is not private or secret, I behave differently towards others. I stop my judgmental thoughts more quickly (I still have them, though!) and I can be more spontaneous... whatever I am thinking comes out of my mouth.

It is important for me to keep my words and actions congruent with my thoughts and beliefs. I believe that a good deal of the peace and joy I have in my life comes from aiming to live honestly and authentically.

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