If Only Every Day Could Be the Day Before the Caucuses

Oh, how I love the day before the Iowa caucuses. It's the last day when the Democrats have nothing to do but try to impress Democrats, and I like to be impressed.

They haven't yet looked like idiots in camouflage hunting suits to presumably look more manly. Their teams of consultants have yet to tell them to take pictures in tanks with helmets to look strong on defense. Hell, Dodd and Biden probably can't even afford consultants to tell them how to do that, because the ones who orchestrated those massive screwups for Kerry and Dukakis cost a lot of money, I'm told.

I have a candidate that I support, but the fact is that not a one of them, in their push to impress folks like me, have done anything that I would find remotely unforgivable in the general election. Good job.

Well, enjoy it while it lasts. Remember that Simpsons episode where Lisa tells Ralph Wiggum that she's breaking up with him and Bart plays back the videotape of it and shows the exact moment his heart breaks in the frame-by-frame? Our "Wiggum moments" always come when do the things that they know not do in January -- be it some sort of display of bellicosity or caving to the president in some unthinkable manner in order to not look soft on something-or-other, but somehow think this is a good thing to do once the stakes go up. I'm dreading/guessing what it will be (please leave predictions in the comments.) Until then, I am basking in this final day before the disappointments begin. If only it could stay January forever.

Our song this week called "I Like You More The Day Before" is our hope that whoever ends up winning the nomination made a New Year's Resolution the other night to run in the general election on the same principles that gives them their victory in the primaries because A) that's why we will have elected them and B) they'll do something stupid that costs them the election if they don't. Enjoy. (Click the button below to play.)

Max and the Marginalized are a band in Los Angeles that writes and records a new song every week for Huffington Post. Be their friend on Facebook.

I Like You More The Day Before

The ball drops at the year's conclusion
Hugs and handshakes and resolutions at the camera lens
Cheers from the audience
Thus far it's been quite convincing
I look for hints of the backbones sinking but they're holding up
In the cold night of Iowa

And it works out well enough
But I'm afraid the year is young
Every time we try to look tough we always look so dumb

When the trees all leave and the corn is defrosted
I'll shake my head when I see that we lost it
On middle ground that offers no reward
So someone best resolve to remember
To stay January long past November
Is that much too much to ask you for
Because I always like you more the day before

Does the same guy every time suggest it
A helmet and tank or a hunting vest why do they hire him?
Will somebody fire him?
But from the unity literati
A casus belli for bellicosity will make it through
And hey that's the end of you

And there's a point to all of this
That I'd like to underscore
They give you just enough rope to hang every one of us in this tug of war

When the trees all leave and the corn is defrosted
I'll shake my head when I see that we lost it
On middle ground that offers no reward
So someone best resolve to remember
It can stay January long past November
Is that much too much to ask you for
Because I always like you more the day before