Watching Kate Gosselin's desperately "happy" smiles, her increasing levels of personal discomfort and, finally, her rehearsal fit-turned-crying-jag on Monday night's Dancing With The Stars made me realize one sad thing. No matter how many tummy-tucks, tooth veneers or hair extensions she gets to meet some external standard of beauty, she'll never feel beautiful and thus, to a great degree, she'll never be beautiful. And no matter how many times Bruno tells her to let herself play a character on the dance floor, what he doesn't really understand is that she already is, and she doesn't know how to stop.
Kate Gosselin in a 35-year-old divorced mother of 8 children with a douchebag, tabloid-baiting, midlife crisis-having, younger-lady boning ex-husband who will forever more be colloquially known as "Stubby," the nickname given to him by Kate's doctor's 22-year-old daughter, who became "the other woman." And if the thought of having (painful, expensive) plastic surgery to make yourself more attractive for your husband only to have him hook up with your doctor's daughter doesn't evoke in you some amount of sympathy, then you've bought into the projection of Kate as the Mean Mommy a little too much.
Sure, she's rigid and she's used to setting the rules. She has eight kids that, even without television cameras around, she's got to help feed, clothe and get places. She has said she always wanted to be a mom, which is why she and Stubby underwent fertility treatments in the first place, and she got her wish in spades. But now, it's pretty clear she doesn't remember how to be anything but a mommy, and it's the only role she's comfortable making primary.
Even a MILF is a mother first, and a sex object second -- but she's neither the only nor the oldest mother on the show. Niecy Nash has three kids and is five years older than Kate; Pamela Anderson is 8 years older than Kate and has 3 kids. Yet neither actress hypes their mommy-ness as much as Kate, and both are infinitely more comfortable in their skin as women, as evidenced by their feminine and sexy performances to date.
Watching Kate dance is a painful experience for the viewer -- nearly as painful as it appears to be for Kate. She obviously doesn't regularly wear heels, shake her hips or move her body (i.e., dance) for fun. She doesn't know where her arms are, let alone where they should be, she stands with her feet further apart than her hips, which projects an air of authority when standing in pants and an air of clumsiness when dancing in a short skirt. And her rehearsal videos show she finds the experience frustrating: why can't she make her body act like the other women in the show? Why is Tony's language about what to do with it so frustratingly confusing and vague?
Kate's used to finding people to blame -- we all are -- and it's easy to say that when a teacher isn't getting through to a student that the teacher needs to find another way. But Tony can't make Kate connect with the feminine part of dance because Kate's disconnected from her own feminine self. Mom is mom, she isn't a sexual being, in Kate's mind, and although she's gone under the knife to an unnecessary degree to achieve the outward appearance of sexiness, she doesn't appear sexy because she doesn't feel sexy. It shows in her body, in her frustration with how she can't make it behave as she wants it to behave, in her brittle smiles and her tensed-up shoulders.
All the haters on the internet can't hate Kate Gosselin as much as she hates herself, and not because of her dancing. What I'd like to see is for Kate to look into a mirror instead of the camera and mouth the words, "I love you" to her own reflection and really mean it. Until then, even the love of her 8 children isn't going to make her feel right inside.
Originally posted to DWTSshow.com
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Bonnie Fuller: Get Off The Hate Kate (Gosselin) Bandwagon!
She's strong, she's attractive, she's a working mom. All of which makes her a perfect target for being called the "D" word and more!
Tonya Plank: Thank You Pamela Anderson for Making Dancing With the Stars Worth Watching Again
I haven't found much to say about Dancing With the Stars lately, but this season, there are a lot of really genuinely likable people on, some whom I didn't expect to be so.
Tonya Plank: Calm Down, Kate: Dancing With the Stars Season 10, Week 2
I really felt badly for Kate Gosselin in practice, especially after Tony got so mad at her he nearly called it quits. She really needs just to calm down and not panic so much.
P.S. Dear Dancing with the Stars: The show is called "Stars" I do not consider the bachelor a star, and surely not Kate. How about the days when the show had real celebrities and not faux reality personalities. There is a difference.
Maybe not, but we can at least TRY! Her self-loathing sets the bar high, but I can still aim for it. A woman's reach should exceed her grasp.
Megan Carpentier: "No One Can Hate Kate Gosselin as Much as She Hates Herself ."
The Real John Locke: "Don't tell me what I can't do!"
This woman is no one's victim, please stop trying to make her out to be one.
First, Kate is VERY comfortable in spiked heels.
AND, Jon was a saint to stay with her for so long. When Jon was home he did everything. She stayed in the kitchen and threw a few carrots and crackers on a plate to feed her kids....and bitched and moaned the whole time.
Why don't you Kate lovers simply post about how much you love her, instead of posting things that you don't know? My explanation is that you are like her and you just like to lie. ------------------------------------
She has previously stated, "I've done enough years on TV that I feel like it's a normal, comfortable, natural place to be..." ht tp://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20315590,00.ht ml
There's a distressing intolerance on regular display on HP, when someone expresses contrary or unpopular opinions. I have serious, rational objection to Kate on many levels, on how celebrity has befallen her, her graceless response, her greedy public behavior, the condescending and denigrating way she treats other people, and the mess she's making of her kids -- and it's not being a hater to express this.
Hateful is continuing to refer to Jon as Stumpy; the author is not unaware that this is the cruelest jibe to throw at a man.
Jon doesn't appear to be working so someone has to support those kids and her choice was just that HERS.
Something Kate has no experience in either.
Kate had a cute show with her daily struggles with life w/two sets of multiples-not a talent a reality.
Dancing is a talent as is acting. Kate has had experience in neither due to a religion that forbid dancing-I can see her learning curve to be harder and higher.
I work hard at what I do. The successful people I admire have worked really hard at what they do. Kate seems to feel -- after a few years on TV, grabbing for all the swag she demanded -- that she deserves the spotlight.
I wish she'd just go away, and continue to pretend to nurture her kids.
We never saw J&K+8 (although we heard of it), but we do enjoy DWTS because we love dance.
I thought that the idea of how you feel on the inside can help with dancing was spot on.
What a charming name, and a charming comment!
:)
Fanned!
That is why the public gets a "vote".
It is why BUZZ was not in the bottom three.
Not everyone can loosen up and dance, this may not be the time for that for her, but she is trying and there is a paycheck that will help the household survive , that is the important issue. Bless her.
In the second season they redid her hair and makeup. The babies were not so much to deal with as they had helpers-nannies who allowed them both more freedoms.
I for one am glad she got rid of the flip flops. Truly not a shoe but a slipper that people are seem to think is appropriate office wear.
At least she is trying to bring money to her household, Jon appears to not care about "working".