Am I the only parent out there who dreams of spring cleaning the messy, loud and annoying kid toys right out of my home? (And, yes, that includes most of them.) Sure, I'd probably regret it a few hours later, because my kids would have little left with which to...
"Body back after baby!" screams the headline.
"How I got my body back!" screams another.
"My body is back!"
What does it even mean to get one's body "back"? Was it stolen? Did it run away like a lost cat? And did the celebrity on the cover...
It's Sleep Awareness Week. This is a week dedicated to promoting the importance of sleep. Sleep needs to be promoted? Not to me! I love to sleep! It's my favorite thing in the world and that's a world that includes pasteurized cookie dough. If I ever decided to get a...
Here's what I have learned about being a parent. Babies and kids are messy. A newsflash it isn't -- but it is true. They're leaky and they're drippy. They're sticky and they're snotty. And if they didn't look so cute in hats, I am not even sure we would even...
I am writing to inform you that I will be resigning from my job as the Internet, effective immediately.
I've greatly enjoyed my work for the last 45 years connecting IP networks around the world. (Did you know I've been in this position for almost half a century? I have!...
The small hand on the clock points to the five.
The cities and the suburbs are quiet.
But me? I've been up for more than an hour.
Oh, isn't being a new mom a riot?
At four a.m. my newborn got hungry.
I had to feed him to silence his fit.
Now he snores with breast milk dotting his lips.
And I'm so tired I can hardly stand it.
Yes, I'm tired, exhausted and bitter.
Can't you tell I'm at the end of my wits?
My poor brain is fried and my body hurts.
Sleep deprivation is truly the pits.
Everybody says to sleep when he sleeps.
Folks who say it think that they are brilliant.
But I need to eat, to bathe, and to pee.
Sleeping is hard to do with an infant.
Six uninterrupted hours would be great.
But I'd take four if my babe would permit.
Because when you're a newborn's open bar,
When you rest, you only rest for a bit.
Every time I sit down to eat dinner,
Or try crossing laundry off of my list,
Whenever I hope to call back a friend,
My son will cry and those cries are legit.
Wait! I'll lie down and close my eyes right now,
Even if it is just for a minute.
I'll do what they say: I'll sleep when he sleeps!
Oh, never mind. He is awake now. Sh*t.
(Adapted from a post on Mammalingo. Melissa Sher no longer has a newborn at home and is happy to report that she's rediscovered sleeping.)
A noodle twirler,
ice cream scooper,
car horn beeper,
dump truck dumper,
Enough with stale Tootsie Rolls and broken bird whistles.
Enough with half-opened Hershey's Kisses and misshapen Slinkys.
Enough with erasers that crumble and rubber ducks that emit fumes.
Enough with the plastic.
Enough with the small.
Enough with the cheap.
Enough with the...
Ich bemitleide Kleinkinder. Wirklich. Wenn ich eins sehe, denke ich nicht: "Oh, wie niedlich!" Ich denke: "Oh, du armes Ding." Denn im Leben eines Kleinkindes geht es nicht etwa nur um Spiel und Spaß. Natürlich kommt das auch vor. Aber es ist auch harte Arbeit. Das Kleinkind-Dasein könnte tatsächlich der...
I pity toddlers. I feel so sorry for those Pillsbury Doughboy look-alikes. I do. When I see one, I don't think, "Oh, how adorable." I think, "Oh, you poor dear." Because being a toddler is not all fun and games. I mean, yes, some of being a toddler is --...
Rektor und Lehrer einer Grundschule in New York haben vor kurzem das jährliche Kinder-Theaterstück abgesagt. Sie fanden, dass sie die Zeit eher brauchen, um „die Kinder auf Studium und Beruf vorzubereiten."
Hier ist ein Auszug aus dem Brief, der am 25. April in der Washington Post erschien:
The principal and teachers at a New York elementary school recently canceled their annual kindergarten show because they felt more time was needed for "preparing children for college and career."
Here's some of the actual letter sent to parents on April 25th that appeared in the Washington...
1. I'm sorry to call at 2 a.m., but I don't think we've ever discussed your philosophy on vaccinations.
2. I did a quick Google search on my phone and have to strongly disagree.
3. It turns out that we actually live closer to your home than to your office....
I want to start living my best life.
Oprah talks about Living Your Best Life and look at her! She's doing it! Is there anyone on the planet living a better life than Oprah? Nope. Except, maybe, Beyoncé. (It's a toss-up when it comes to whether Oprah or Beyoncé...
Eleven-year-old Delaney Clements is fighting cancer. In 2010, she was diagnosed with neuroblastoma. Delaney, according to news reports, is very sick.
One in 300 boys and one in 333 girls under age 20 will develop cancer. But those numbers don't really matter in this particular story. What matters...
I love that LeanIn.org and the Girl Scouts have partnered to help empower girls and encourage them to lead. I love what they're doing. I just don't love how they've chosen to word their message. I don't like the decision to build the campaign around "ban bossy."
My number one...
Vanity Fair runs its version of "The Proust Questionnaire" every month. By answering, participants often reveal a great deal about their true nature. Because I've wanted to better understand babies and toddlers for some time, I've asked a 1-year-old, 2-year-old and 3-year-old to answer questions from the survey.