iPhone app iPad app Android phone app Android tablet app More

Featuring fresh takes and real-time analysis from HuffPost's signature lineup of contributors
Melissa Sher

GET UPDATES FROM Melissa Sher
 

What Children Can Teach Us About Happiness

Posted: 06/28/2012 2:45 pm

The How of Happiness. The Now of Happiness. The Tao of Happiness. Looking for Happiness. Map To Happiness. Finding Happiness. Authentic Happiness. True Happiness. The Happiness Hypothesis. The Happiness Plan. The Happiness Project. The Happiness Solution. The Happiness Diet. And my favorite, Eat Your Way To Happiness. Books on happiness are almost as popular as ones about teenage vampires in love. Yet, for those of us with small children, it's hard to find time to read an entire book (or rinse shampoo out of our hair). But here's the good news: we're surrounded by real-life examples of people who are successfully pursuing happiness each and every day.

Yes. Young children are messy, loud, drippy and don't know how to wipe themselves. But, they're also pretty freakin' happy. And so, even though I don't have the time or energy to read a 250-page book, I have been watching my children. (I'm actually legally required to watch my children because I was told keeping a baby monitor turned up really, really high isn't proper parental supervision.) Here's why I think little kids are happiness experts.

LOOK: 14 Things Kids Know About Happiness

Loading Slideshow...
  • They Make Friends Fast

    Whether at the park or the pediatrician's office, little kids make friends quickly. "Do you want to play?" That's it. "Do you want to play?" They don't seem to worry about being rejected. I don't even think rejection crosses their mind. As adults, it is much more difficult to form a relationship so quickly. Unless you are in a bar at closing time.

  • They Don't Hold Grudges

    Sure, little kids fight. But when it's over, it's over. They don't stew. They don't stay mad for weeks. They don't gossip on the phone about Max getting extra Goldfish during snack time. This is exactly why "Real Housewives" doesn't revolve around the lives of a bunch of four year olds.

  • They're Curious

    "Why aren't bananas juicy?" "How did the first person who made pancakes know how to make pancakes?" "How did the baby get into your tummy?" There's so much to learn. And looking for answers to life's infinite puzzles makes for an interesting individual. I wish I were more curious. I should ask more questions. How does pressing a button on a remote control turn off the TV? What turns hair gray?" You would think I'd really want to get to the bottom of that one.

  • They're Confident

    "Look how high I can jump!" "Look at how strong I am!" "Isn't this picture beautiful?" Some experts think today's kids have too much self esteem. They think today's parents overpraise their offspring. Possibly. But, it's also my belief that as kids, we start out filled to capacity with confidence, but -- ever so slowly -- it leaks out of us like helium from a balloon. (Sigh.)

  • They Play

    And they don't even do it because it will look good on their résumés.

  • They're Not Afraid To Show Their Feelings

    The good, the bad and the ugly. And, by ugly, I mean the things you have to apologize for on your child's behalf using lame excuses like "needs to eat" or "missed his nap." Because no one wants to publicly admit that their child is actually rested and well fed... and just poorly behaved.

  • They Don't Mind Getting Dirty

    You might mind, but they don't.

  • They're Uninhibited

    They'll dress themselves in fairy wings, a tutu and galoshes to go to the grocery store. Once there, they'll break into song in the cereal aisle. Having a kid is probably a lot like living with Zooey Deschanel.

  • They Don't Care About Price Tags

    Prada. Gucci. Armani. Valerie Bertinelli. (Did you know she had a clothing line, by the way?) Little kids don't care about the name on the label... as long as it's not scratchy.

  • They're Cheap Dates Too

    Sure, you can take them to the zoo. But, you can also take them out back to look at squirrels, and then you don't have to pay for parking.

  • They're Funny

    Naturally. And, sometimes, on purpose. Be warned, however, little-kid jokes are difficult to follow because most have no punch line. Also, you can't assume a joke is over because your child is laughing. Nine times out of ten, when a kid tells a joke, she's going to laugh from beginning to end.

  • They See The Best In People

    I'm not sure at what age most of us become cynical, but it's not when we are in preschool. Of course, small children are also incredibly gullible. If you were to tell them you invented the s'more, they'd believe you. (Suckers!)

  • They're Honest

    If a five year old tells you that you're the most beautiful mommy in the world, he thinks you are. If he also tells you that your bare legs remind him of daddy's beard, he thinks that as well.

  • They're Good At Keeping Secrets

    Okay. Just kidding. They're absolutely, positively terrible at keeping secrets. They're the worst secret keepers EVER. But, hey, they're just kids. They can't be good at everything.

Read more from Melissa Sher on Mammalingo.com

 

Follow Melissa Sher on Twitter: www.twitter.com/mammalingo

FOLLOW IMPACT
The How of Happiness. The Now of Happiness. The Tao of Happiness. Looking for Happiness. Map To Happiness. Finding Happiness. Authentic Happiness. True Happiness. The Happiness Hypothesis. The Happine...
The How of Happiness. The Now of Happiness. The Tao of Happiness. Looking for Happiness. Map To Happiness. Finding Happiness. Authentic Happiness. True Happiness. The Happiness Hypothesis. The Happine...
 
 
  • Comments
  • 29
  • Pending Comments
  • 0
  • View FAQ
Comments are closed for this entry
View All
Favorites
Recency  | 
Popularity
Page: 1 2  Next ›  Last »  (2 total)
This user has chosen to opt out of the Badges program
01:39 PM on 07/15/2012
It's too bad we lose much of this joy as we become adults. It reminds me of a book entitled something to the effect, "All we will ever need, we learned in Kindergarten" I love kids--- no hidden agenda, no pretention, total free expression.
maxfax
Taa - dah!
11:09 AM on 07/07/2012
I'm not sure this applies to children born into poverty.
This user has chosen to opt out of the Badges program
01:41 PM on 07/15/2012
Why not? They have no idea that they are poor. They are so adaptable to whatever their circumstances. Just look at some of the kids in 3rd world countries who smile for the smallest thing.
09:26 PM on 07/03/2012
The most important thing children teach me about happiness is finding someone else work to pay my rent, food, & clothing while I just be respectful and go and play with my friends.
photo
sweetpatriot
28,woman,healthcareworker,polyglot,bisexual.
09:29 PM on 07/02/2012
Children have taught me a lot of lessons.They are very tolerant(if their parents have not poisoned them).They are adorable,they are not selfish,they are curious,they are ready to learn.
12:45 PM on 07/02/2012
This slideshow is adorable! Great job!
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
charleyvldm9
He thinks outside the box.
05:40 PM on 06/30/2012
Adults laugh about 10 times per day,children 200 times, at least we adults can learn something there.
05:33 PM on 06/30/2012
Love this post and so true I am actually writing about this at the moment. The more we can keep in touch with our childlike sense of wonder, play and creativity the happier we can become.

https://www.facebook.com/pages/Ruth-HumphreysMagic-Carpet-Storytelling/424726900876029
02:50 AM on 06/30/2012
yeah, i was a severely shy, terrified, fearful child. very unhappy. but with great parents. who knows.
02:13 AM on 06/30/2012
Well I guess I was just a crappy kid then.
11:53 PM on 06/29/2012
Because children are totally connected to spirit, before becoming 'socialised', we can truly learn a lot by observation of thier behaviour.
Celine
http://www.actuallyitsaboutlove.com
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Kellybelle22
Medicine. Marriage. Motherhood.
11:26 PM on 06/29/2012
One of the things I love most madly about my little one is that she GETS it. She understands that hugs and kisses are essential to daily life. That if there's ketchup on the plate, it's to be both eaten and used to paint. That it doesn't matter whether shoes really match. That bathtime is for splashing. That a Fig Newton and a piece of cheese are a gourmet feast. She doesn't get mired down in order, perfection, silly details or right/wrong. She just looks at everything through a fresh new perspective and with curious eyes and an open heart. She's far wiser than most of the adults I know.
This user has chosen to opt out of the Badges program
photo
ecotopian
I am nerd, hear me geek
10:23 PM on 06/29/2012
I'm going to be a contrarian and say that kids don't teach about happiness, they remind us of happiness. We should remember this from when we were kids. We get to rediscover the world through their eyes. This rocks. I cannot explain the things I have rediscovered through the eyes of my children.
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
themightyabealrd
screw the real world-I'm an artist!
06:09 PM on 06/29/2012
A cheering piece indeed. My grandson is now 12 & I love him dearly. But self-consciousness has set in & he no longer does his 'We're going to the library dance!' or his 'Papa's buying me ice cream !' dance,
neither of which was to be confused with his 'I gotta go to the bathroom real bad but I don't want to miss anything!' dance.
Little kids teach us how to live in the moment-if we pay attention.
photo
HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Melissa Sher
blogger, Mammalingo
11:50 PM on 06/29/2012
I love that. I think my four year old dances the way your grandson used to when he has to go to the bathroom. The answers that I receive when I ask if he has to go to the bathroom are typically, "No, I'm just really excited!" "No, I just feel like dancing!" And, "No, I'm just cold so I'm warming myself up!"
08:47 AM on 06/29/2012
I Love This Article!!! My Super Happy 2.5 year old saved me in every way! I didn't think it was possible but yes, happiness is contagious! I feel like his happiness is a reminder every day that I'm succeeding in Motherhood and that makes me happy as well. Not to say he doesn't have his moments... Oh does he! But most of the time he is happy and healthy and that alone is my Prozac!
photo
HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Melissa Sher
blogger, Mammalingo
11:52 PM on 06/29/2012
This was really beautiful to read. "I feel like his happiness is a reminder every day that I'm succeeding in motherhood." Thanks very much for sharing it.
photo
askskia
Applaud the people that make you think.
05:52 AM on 06/29/2012
Sure it's true that not all children are like this and when they're not perhaps it's worth it to find out why? Children have their entire lives to become cynical. Today, they should be allowed to just be happy!