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Meredith Fineman Headshot

Fifty First (J)Dates: 20 -- Meh

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Often when you go out with someone, you know instantly whether you want to jump their bones or run for the hillz. In DC, I mean run for the Hill. Sometimes, you're just meh. Isn't this a wonderful, descriptive word?

Meh, Adj: lukewarm, blah, asi asi, whatevs.

What are you supposed to do when you go out with someone, you like them, but you're not sure if you want to join them on a love journey through space and time at a restaurant that might irritate your tummy? You don't want to waste someone's time, but I also am a believer that you can't always gauge how much chemistry you have with someone on a first date.

If it didn't go great, it could have been a off night for him, and he's otherwise fantastic Maybe you only brought your B+ game because the shoes you really wanted on Gilt went to someone else at the last second with a quicker index finger and a higher credit line and now you're pissy. Only another date will tell. But you don't want to waste anyone's time, money, or cute outfit, that's for sure.

What I Wore: Genetic Denim jeans (amazeballs find, on sale for $36! But then again, at this point, I probably shouldn't be buying anything because I should be saving dinero to move out of my parents house and into an apartment where I will quickly realize that giant bags of lactose-free cheese and 500-packs of Peanut M&Ms don't buy themselves. Sigh. I guess I'll go back to the slightly shameful but very important skill I acquired in college of stealing anything not nailed down. Not illegally, but plastic silverware, straws, napkins, toilet paper if nobody's checking, 80000 packs of Splenda I'll never use.) Urban Outfitters black silk jacket, (I am so into this. It's from their Silence & Noise line and the front cut is kinda Rick Owens but sans $4000 price tag.) Blue Theory tank top that's stretchy and sucks you in and is apparently "one size fits all" but give me a freaking break Theory, you're destroying everyone's body image, Dior blue patent-leather peep toe pumps.

Where We Went: Bar Dupont. Love this place. It's actually a nice lounge in DC! Shocking. Attractive crowd, more important addition of WASABI PEAS! Dear bars of Washington, free food is fun. Even if that guy to my left may or may not have sneezed on it. Five second rule.

So, this is where we get to the meh. He was really cute. He was really nice. He works on the Hill. But I couldn't really decide why I felt so...ehhhhhh. It was sort of like Taylor Swift's song at the VMAs. Nice, but slightly odd and awkward. Also, she got Kanye West's age wrong. If you're 19 and you're writing a song about a guy who is powerful, scary, and slightly off his rocker (rapper), you should maybe get his age right. Also, Team Chelsea Handler.

Anyway, I was sitting there singing a nice Taylor Swift song with my crimped blonde hair and my weird-looking silver guitar trying to figure out how I felt.

I had two choices after we finished our drinks.

Should I go out with him again, maybe subject him to my silly little jokes about grand left auto, and see if it gets better?

Or should I just cut my losses and pour the wasabi peas from Bar Dupont into my purse where they will stay for safe keeping when I can't dig my paw into the 32-ounce tub of hummus in my fridge? Decisions, decisions.

It was then that Kanye interrupted my song. "Look Meredith," he said, "I'ma let you finish, but I think you've got a better contender here." And he was right.

To my FFJD fans - all three of you, I've started to date someone more seriously, so for now my personal accounts of first dates are coming to a close. Yes, I will regale you with ditties about all sorts of topics.

But now it's your turn. Help me get to 50. I made it to 20, I want your craziest first date stories, your online dating hellish hilarity, and your souls. It doesn't have to be funny, I will spin it into a web of friendship string and frozen yogurt.

Who is he? I guess you'll have to keep reading to find out. "Don't leave us hanging like this!" you say. OH I won't. The best is yet to come. Maybe you'll even get a second-date write up. Email your stories to


Gefiltefish Girl