This summer I was on assignment in London to cover the Olympics. I met this amazing, wonderful guy and basically stayed with him up until a week ago. It was the best love experience I have ever had, but I live in New York City and he lives there plus I just got a great new gig in NYC and can't move. My friends say he should move here if he's in love. No matter, I am love sick. I can't stop thinking about him. What do I do? Thanks. Holly G, New York City
What they say about love is true: it's like a drug. You need to detox from your affair and step back. You don't want to make decisions when you are 'high' -- trust me on that one.
Back in my day, I met someone in Los Angeles when I was covering the Emmy's for a magazine. I took him back to Miami with me. To quote Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman, "Big Mistake. Huge."
Totally forget this moving for each other thing like a drunken night of karaoke. For now, the best advice is get back into your New York routine. The distance can only do two things, drive you apart or bring you together for a weekend. If these weekends together continue, then write me again and I'll advise you on how to walk, not run, into this relationship.
This summer my boyfriend and I rented a house on Fire Island. I was there most of the time and he came out only on weekends. One night during the week I had a tryst with a guy that's in our inner circle. I feel like it was something we needed to get out of our systems since we were both attracted to each other. We haven't seen each other since, but now that summer is over and we will all be back in the city, I'm feeling nervous about the situation. Name Withheld, New York City
In a nutshell, your boyfriend was in New York City presumably working his butt off and you were having sex with other guys on Fire Island. Wow! You're really a great guy.
The only thing you should be nervous about is yourself. You seem quite selfish because you're not even remotely concerned about your boyfriend. Instead you're worried that you may be busted for cheating in your social circle. Seriously, the fact that you are more concerned with keeping face than hurting someone else you're in an intimate relationship with, speaks volumes and not good ones, about your character.
I don't exactly think you are relationship material, so come clean with the guy you are dating (yes, that means being honest) and go get some more stuff out of your system.
My boyfriend and I took our first trip as a couple and ever since we returned from Puerto Rico things just aren't the same. We used to text all the time, have sleepovers during the week and in general, have a much better time than we are now. Now the texts have slowed down and all of a sudden, he is much busier than usual. I am about to lose it. My gut instinct tells me this is not going to end well or am I overreacting? Thanks. Jen W, Miami
I always tell my friends this when they take their first trip as couple -- either you're going to come back totally in love or it's over. Jen, sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but it seems your relationship falls in the latter.
I say this because the way he treats you has dramatically changed for the worse. If he was excited and head over heels, everything would have continued heating up, not gone cold. It's just that simple.
While this isn't the news you might have hoped for, I can assure you your path will light up again soon on the daunting, yet oddly exciting journey of finding the one.
One more thing -- Puerto Rico? Geez, you live in Miami. Try something a bit more adventurous next time with scenery other than palm trees.
Need advice from on everything from matters of the heart to matters of the high heel? Write me at firstname.lastname@example.org pr leave a comment below.
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