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Michael W. Waters

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A Painful (Yet Familiar) Ritual

Posted: 03/18/2012 8:18 am

My only son turned five years old last week. He is a handsome, articulate, energetic, intelligent, fun-loving and gentle young man. He is the apple of my eye!

There's only one problem; he is Black.

And as his father, I am challenged to do for him what generations of African American fathers have had to do for their sons for far too long in this country; I must inform him that because of his unique blend of gender and pigmentation, there are a different set of rules with which he must contend while growing up.

Nineteen years ago, on a frigid December night in Waco, Texas, what was intended to be a quick stop at the convenience store turned into a two-hour lesson on the racial history of America. A teenager, I was wearing a large jacket with a hood. As I readied myself to exit the car, my grandfather, with whom we were visiting for the holidays, proclaimed, "Take that hood off your head before you go in that store or they will blow your brains out!" Such sudden outbursts were uncharacteristic for my rather mild-mannered grandfather. I found his proclamation of the possibility of my abrupt and violent demise rather upsetting. And it was difficult for me to comprehend. I was simply going to buy some sodas, a rather non-hostile action in my opinion.

For what felt more like an eternity than two hours, my grandfather, grandmother, mother, and uncle awakened me to some troubling realities: 1) That my dark skin, then embracing a 5-foot-10-inch, 13-year-old frame, was a considerable threat for some people, and 2) that some people would not be patient enough to judge me based on the content of my character but rather would be fixated on the color of my skin, and that the color of my skin, viewed through the lens of their own prejudices, meant that I was the physical embodiment of their greatest fear (a big, Black man), fears reinforced daily by mass media. Ever since that fateful December night, I have lived life in full view of these realities.

Having added over five inches and one hundred pounds to that 13-year-old frame over the years, when riding in elevators, I have learned to give quick and easy smiles to disarm my fellow passengers and to ensure them that they are not in any imminent danger. I am mindful of my tone and the inflection of my voice when in conversation in mixed groups as I have learned that I am not afforded the same terms of conversation as others. For if I slightly raise my voice, instead of describing me as passionate, some will label me an angry Black man. Like countless generations of Black men, I have been followed in stores and stopped by police so many times without cause that I am pleasantly surprised when it does not happen.

Now, I, a latter generation Gen-Xer, must pass down to my post-Millennial son some of the rules of engagement for a Black man in this society: 1) If the police stop you make sure you stop in a well-lit area and don't make any sudden moves. In fact, verbally broadcast your actions (i.e., Officer, I am now reaching into the glove compartment for my registration). 2) Always get the receipt after making a purchase, no matter how small, so no one can falsely accuse you of theft later. 3) It doesn't matter if the white kids are doing it. Your punishment will always be much more severe if you are caught doing the same. This is also true for adulthood.

I must inform my son that even if he were blessed to graduate from an Ivy League law school with high honors, having served as the editor of that prestigious school's law review, and go on to be elected the President of the United States of America, even then, some people will consider him to be unqualified for the job and question whether he is a "true" American on account of his Blackness. I will tell him about James Byrd, Jr., the fake drug scandal of Dallas, the Tulia drug busts, and other contemporary instances of societal racism in our home State of Texas, even as previous generations of Black fathers have spoken to their sons of Emmett Till, the Tuskegee Experiment, and COINTELPRO.

And yes, I will tell him about Troy Anthony Davis. I will tell him that even in the face of compelling doubt surrounding his conviction, the cries of other nations, or the pleas of former U.S. Presidents and Nobel Laureates to spare his life, poison can be injected into his veins, for in the eyes of some, he is considered to be an animal that must be put down at all costs.

I will take part in this familiar, yet painful, ritual, for as the Apostle Paul articulated to his sons and daughters in the faith, I would not want my son to be "uninformed...about the troubles we [have] experienced" in this country (2 Corinthians 1:8).

Then I will tell my son, "Go and change the world!"

 

Follow Michael W. Waters on Twitter: www.twitter.com/RevMikeWaters

My only son turned five years old last week. He is a handsome, articulate, energetic, intelligent, fun-loving and gentle young man. He is the apple of my eye! There's only one problem; he is Black. ...
My only son turned five years old last week. He is a handsome, articulate, energetic, intelligent, fun-loving and gentle young man. He is the apple of my eye! There's only one problem; he is Black. ...
 
 
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08:50 PM on 10/10/2011
I applaud your bravery in writing this post. It will take honest dialogue from all sides of this issue to make any sort of lasting change.
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dancerctry
I love Gardening and Decorating
10:10 PM on 10/07/2011
I am white, 5' 3" and a woman so most black men I see are really big to me. I do find myself looking up at them but even with a diagnosed Anxiety disorder I tend only to fear those that are following me too closely (I do the same for men of any race that are too close behind me and I feel like I'm being followed). I find most to be like giant teddy bears. We follow the Yankees, Giants (football), Devils (Hockey), Nets (Basketball), and Red Bulls (Soccor) so the only real reason I stare is I am trying to figure out if they are from one of these teams. I read a study a year ago how people notice differences in other people of there race but people from other races mostly look the same. I find that true and try to find differences. I always apologize and explain myself so they know I am not scared of them. I commented on how I thought Troy Davis was a victim of racism and got a lot of people saying I was wrong but they couldn't answer when I said "Why else did Casey Anthony get aquitted due to insufficient evidence yet he was killed IN SPITE of insufficient evidence?" One commentor said 7 of the jurors were black. I have never heard that and question that. Judge on actions, not color.
12:48 PM on 10/05/2011
Teach him to glance at but not ask for the badge number. Teach him to always have his license and registration handy. Teach him to have two hand on the wheel. Teach him to apologize first. Teach him to smile and say sir or mam. Teach him to always look at both sides of a racial issue in public without stating his opinion. Teach him to walk and talk in a non threatening manner with his hands exposed. Then, teach him to take up pen and paper to settle these disputes. Keeping your son alive and safe is the pre-eminent goal.
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MarcEdward
likes all cats more than most people
11:57 AM on 10/05/2011
And on another thread, white people are screaming about how unfair it is they cannot use the "N-Word".
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08:54 AM on 10/05/2011
For those of us that have daughters, I could have taken a similar stance, but did not and should not have. Women continue to be second class citizens in many aspects of life, especially in other cultures and countries, where they are stoned to death because THEY were raped and nothing happens to the perp. I could go on and on, one only need read Amnesty Internationals' articles to be enlightened on the horrific conditions women are put under to this day. I understand what the writer is saying as best I can, being a white women living in Canada, however I don't think that instilling fear and in one's child is the answer because in one way or another we all have differences that can be revered or cause us to be shunned, be it special needs, gender, sexual orientation, race, weight, religion, etc. etc. As long as children are told they're different and that they're going to experience hate, and prejudice how will they grow up to without the same hate and prejudice then.
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megwolff
Plant-based cook & survivor
03:08 PM on 10/07/2011
Maybe so in some points you are making, but the writer isn't scaring his son just dealing with what is, I call that emotional intelligence. His grandfather gave him this same advice and he grew up to be a famous pastor. I think the last line speak volumes: "Then I will tell my son, "Go and change the world!"
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Ohin Gaston
03:32 PM on 10/04/2011
Again I'll Say I completely understand this article......

BUT

I'm tried....I'm tired of constantly looking over my back for police as a normal law abiding citizen.
I'm tired....of women looking at me like I'm going to rob them even when I'm in my suit.
I'm tired...of all of the little ways I have to correct myself so no one feels threatened by me.

I am a proud educated, eclectic black man. I see the world through a jaded lends because the world see me through that same broken glass. I hate having to deal with things the 'normal' americans don't ever face in their lives nor does it even cross their mind. We demand change!!! We demand fair and equal treatment that is promised to us by the constitution...Damn it....WE Built this country...for free. This is the least you could do to repay your debt to us!
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GlennWatson
Two million fans
05:00 PM on 10/04/2011
Come and get it.
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Ohin Gaston
11:31 AM on 10/05/2011
How do you mean!?
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Ohin Gaston
03:09 PM on 10/04/2011
Thank you, Thank you, Thank you!!!!!!
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WendellPerrySociety
02:41 PM on 10/04/2011
"I have learned to give quick and easy smiles to disarm my fellow passengers and to ensure them that they are not in any imminent danger."

Why do you feel a need to put them at ease - if they have angst about your mere presence that's their problem not yours - I rarely even smile back when they give me their little nervous smile. I rather enjoy the tension my presence creates for the ignorant, and I have always refused to do anything to put them at ease because they are nervous about being in the presence of a large black man.
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Ohin Gaston
03:12 PM on 10/04/2011
I understand your stance however, I also understand his and how uncomfortable it can be for me to have a person look at me that way. I agree that one should not give up who they are for anyone. But I've been harassed to many time by the police and others... simply put I don't want the hassle so I do what I can to avoid it.

I prefer to be the 'Spook who sat by the door'
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GlennWatson
Two million fans
05:01 PM on 10/04/2011
"I rather enjoy the tension my presence creates"

Gee I wonder why anyone would feel threatened?
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WendellPerrySociety
10:25 AM on 10/05/2011
You are obviously white - so I don't expect you to understand - therefore, I want bother to explain.
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WendellPerrySociety
10:26 AM on 10/05/2011
BTW - I noticed you left off part of my statement which is pretty important to my point.
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GlennWatson
Two million fans
12:24 PM on 10/04/2011
Here is what I know.

If an older black woman is walking down the street and coming in the opposite direction are three young black men with hoodies, she clutches her purse a little tighter and thinks about crossing the street. If its three white kids she does not. This reaction might or might not be rational, I don't know, but it is true.

Let the attacks on my character begin now. But try and think about the truth of what I am saying too.
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01:18 PM on 10/04/2011
You'd have to have character. It would be as apparent as your gift for hyperbole and absoluteness.
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GlennWatson
Two million fans
01:27 PM on 10/04/2011
Ok, now that the personal attacks are over lets focus on the issue. I won't hold my breath.
06:44 AM on 10/04/2011
I have three children. 2 of which are boys so I am worried that my children will have a hard life because of their skin color. We were treated badly when we stayed in Ohio and had a shotgun pulled on us while traveling through Alabama all because the store owner didnt want to sell to us... Scared out of my mind I had to stay calm and get my children away from the situation... I am amazed that life still has to be like this in the year 2011.... They say racism isnt active still but it really is and its ridiculous...
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dancerctry
I love Gardening and Decorating
10:16 PM on 10/07/2011
That ain't right!!! A nice law abiding citizen should never have a gun pointed at them! We have come so far but still have so far to go in this country.
03:55 AM on 10/04/2011
My family is a black proud family. I wouldn't want to be any other colour. I wouldn't want to be white.

I love being black. I love my genes. I love our history of survival. I love being a role model to others. I'm a bit of an attention seeker, and living in a predominantly white area, I get it. I love proving people's stereotypes wrong. I love outsmarting others. I love knowing that we evolved and mutated skin to withstand solar radiation. I love the fact that we have produced the top athletes of the world. I love the fact that within the black community, they are other black males that value weight training. And I love - well, almost everything.

Individually, I love being black, - I absolute hate those black people who get involved in criminality and in particular drugs.

Too few people say this, but it's a real priviledge to be black. The dark knights of the world, haha and I love it.
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FloridaLAW
This Day, This Moment, Right Now!
06:09 AM on 10/04/2011
I agreed all the way up to saying that you ha-te people that get involved with drugs. If you don't want someone to prejudge you, maybe you shouldn't judge another man for what he may be doing just to survive. I understand the negative stereotypes associated with criminal behavior and Blacks. But I have a lot more respect for a man that can't find a job but hustles selling a little weed to keep food on his families table, than I would a man that sets back and feels sorry for himself and allows his family to go on welfare or to starve.
07:47 AM on 10/04/2011
Strongly, and irrevocably disagree with that viewpoint.

Doing drugs is low, and carries no sense of black pride whatsoever. Speaking from experience, I have never taken drugs. A few years ago I was offered coke, weed and other drugs by "whites", for free. I said 'no' in every one of them situations and walked away. And that's what being black is about. You do the right thing in the face of adversity.

Doing drugs is low. Selling them is low. And drug dealers are destroying lives of other people, and damaging the black community. I don't know why some black people have come to acceptability that taking drugs is OK. It isn't. They can and do cause serious damage to the human body. Some drugs severely impair a person's ability to make healthy choices and decisions. They are psychologically addictive with cravings that make people more aggressive, anxious and prone to mood swings. We're talking lifelong problems not only for the drug taker, but also potentially, for their children schizophrenia, permanent nerve damage, defects. Drugs should *never* be an option.

Now, no offense Florida, but if people like you are going around justifying drug use, then I cannot think that you have the interests of the black community at heart. One can find *respectable* entrepreneur ways to get an extra income. If they really, really can't, then *still* I would never think that resorting to crime is justifiable. Being black is about doing what is right morally.
08:19 AM on 10/04/2011
As a side note, because I ran out of words on my last post, I'd just like to mention that considering racism helps put things in a better perspective, but only if done properly. So, Sir Waters has done a reasonable job at making aware how racism affects us, but, my parents would say, this is what racists want and this is why you *must* not do these things. Racists want to see black people poor, weak, sick, not in education, in prison, doing drugs, divorced, getting involved in criminal activities and generally killing themselves. So, this is why you must be strong, get an education, raise a family etc.....

It's not a case of, there's racism that affects us and we're just to be *aware* of it. The real intelligence is instilling that this is one of the reasons why we have to be successful, law-abiding, healthy etc.
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Ohin Gaston
03:15 PM on 10/04/2011
You left our or scholars.... The athletes are great and all but I ties in to the stereotype of The Scary Black Beast man. We are a vast and proud race. I too am proud to be a black man!!
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Cal3b G
UShypocrisy
02:55 AM on 10/04/2011
What really shocked me the most about this article is that you didn't already figure some of this out on your own until you were 19 years old! I'm not being rude, I'm just saying i'm rather astonished.
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Michael W. Waters
10:05 PM on 10/04/2011
Thank you for your response! A closer reading of my blog will reveal that I received these revelations at the age of thirteen, which I note as being nineteen years ago.
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dancerctry
I love Gardening and Decorating
10:23 PM on 10/07/2011
Not that this will make you feel better but I'm white and have a story about my eagle scout brother. Once he was pulled over on a highway for speeding. When they saw his camping knife on the chair next to him the cop called for back up and searched the car. Eight officers in all came. He wasn't doing anything illegal so he got off with just the speeding ticket but all 8 of those cops got to report pulling a white dude over so. BTW he was heading home from Newark, NJ (we live near there) where there are a lot of gangs and drugs and all that. I had elementary students at Sylvan from there and one couldn't go trick or treating since his school was closed that day while they looked for bodies. I'm scared in Newark (but not because of skin color) but I love talking to people, no matter the skin color. I have another comment on this blog you should look for. I appreciate this post. thanks. Hopefully, people like you and your son can help ease that prejudice. Personally, I always ask how African Americans feel about being called Black because I want to respect all of you.
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Cal3b G
UShypocrisy
02:50 PM on 10/09/2011
I stand corrected sir. My apology for not making sure I had all of my facts straight before commenting (-:
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megwolff
Plant-based cook & survivor
03:32 PM on 10/07/2011
Her was 13.
10:55 PM on 10/03/2011
I also have an almost five year old , who is very intelligent ,his reading and reasoning abilities astound me and those who come in contact with him He is the love of my life and I know that one day we will have the talk that most black parents have with their sons , regarding race and the negative stereotypes about black men , but to be honest , what I concerns me even more is the black on black crime , just look at those statistics , I am concerned about black youth thinking that getting an education and speaking well means " acting white " I am concerned that we are teaching them to blame racism and complain, rather than knuckle up and compete . I am concerned that after all these years, blacks still have not learned that any race dependent on another for its economic survival is doomed to failure... Marcus Garvey, just look at black male unemployment ! and the list goes on , before we can change the world we must change ourselves .
08:38 AM on 10/04/2011
haha. Yes, they have names for it don't they. They called me, Bounty, or Bounty Hunter. Bounty because the chocalates have black/brown chocalate on the outside and white on the inside. There's this really stupid attitude in the black community youth where acting black is basically, well, stupid: chains, caps , baggy trousers and really bad "music".

Anyway, completely agree. We can use racism to better ourselves.
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William Munny
10:28 PM on 10/03/2011
This is great advice for every young Black male, although I have become much more optimistic for the future of these same young people. They will live in a much more colorful world than we did. The U.S. census data has been telling us this for a long time. Also, young people don't look at race, gender, and sexual orientation as defining factors the same way their elders once did.
I have to admit, the election of Obama is what really made me realize I had a different world view compared to younger people. I can distinctly remember telling a group of youth that I didn’t think I’d ever see a Black man elected president of the U.S. in my lifetime. Turns out I’ll probably end up seeing a woman, Latino, and/or Asian president before I die. For many young people this has likely always been their thinking, even though older people like me often place limitations on their expectations.
I will prepare and educate my son on how to navigate this world with caution, but my hope is his world will be less treacherous. If he is ever pulled over by a police officer, that officer is more likely to have a best friend who looks like my son. When he goes into a store the owner could be married to someone who looks like him. It sounds idealistic, but their world will be different from ours.
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GlennWatson
Two million fans
08:03 PM on 10/03/2011
"If the police stop you make sure you stop in a well-lit area and don't make any sudden moves. In fact, verbally broadcast your actions"

Same advice my white son gets.
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Robin08
11:44 PM on 10/03/2011
@GlennWatson,

How many stories do you know of white men being accidentally shot because the officier thought he had a gun or preceived him to be resisting arrest?
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GlennWatson
Two million fans
12:09 PM on 10/04/2011
I have not made a count but it might be that white men are less violent and don't resist arrest as much.
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Cal3b G
UShypocrisy
02:56 AM on 10/04/2011
Is there some kind of point you're trying to make? Because you didn't make it.
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GlennWatson
Two million fans
12:09 PM on 10/04/2011
I will use smaller words next time.