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Michaela Haas

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Oh, Boy! The Anti-Girl Bias Is in Fashion

Posted: 06/26/11 04:27 PM ET

If you could only have one child, would you prefer it to be a boy or a girl? Honestly? Here it is: 40 percent of Americans prefer to have a son and only 26 percent a daughter. This is the result of the Gallup poll of 1947 and -- hold your breath -- of 2011. The Gallup researchers have asked Americans a variation of this same question ten times since 1941, with little variance in the result. Oh, boy! Do prejudices ever change? Let's take a closer look: In 2011, 49% of men want a boy, women essentially have no preference. So, it's a guys' thing, is it? Shockingly, it's also an age thing: Americans who are younger than 30 say they would prefer a boy to a girl by a 54% to 27% margin. That boy-preference gap declines to 12 points among those 30 to 49, to 5 points among those 50 to 64, and finally to only 2 points among those 65 and older.

The anti-girl bias is in fashion -- not only in America, but around the globe. It is unclear how far Americans are willing to go to act on their gender preference, but new technologies such as artificial insemination and in vitro fertilization make it as easy as stock picking for hopeful parents to choose their favorite sex. Thus far, most attention has been focused on Asia, where, by the sheer population numbers, these kinds of decisions have a devastating effect in tilting the global gender balance. Last year, the Economist reported a "war on girls," counting 100 million missing baby girls worldwide. Recently, the Philadelphia Inquirer pointed out that the demographic shift will have major consequences in the decades ahead.

I think we need to ask a broader question and understand the reasons: What's behind it? Why, sisters, why?

Let's take a look at Asia, where the girl bias is most obvious, and most deadly. As its latest 2011 census reveals, India counts 914 girls younger than six years for every 1,000 boys. If nobody interfered, only a few more boys than girls would be born. If I do the math right, this means that in India alone, 500,000 girls are not allowed to live -- every year. The numbers in China, with its strict implementation of the one-child-family, are even worse.

These are staggering figures, and a rather recent development. In India, it is the flipside of an emerging India with a new middle class, a higher literacy rate, better health care. Until the sixties, the girl ratio in India was almost even. Now millions have new access to modern diagnostics, and this blessing can come with a curse. Middle-class parents get to know the gender of their baby through prenatal ultrasound, and they have a choice -- do they want to abort their baby girl and try for a boy instead? Economists thought that gendercide would decrease as the wealth in Asian nations increases, but the recent Indian census and other studies reveal the opposite: more and more parents opt for a boy. The truth is: it is not getting better for girls, it is getting worse.

"The problem is much greater than economics, education and lifestyle," says Glenn Fawcett, Field Executive Director of the nonprofit Lotus Outreach, who has worked in some of Asia's poorest regions for almost two decades. India has long banned gendercide, but law and family pressure are two different categories. Often, the pregnant women are pressured by their families to abort if they expect a girl -- especially if it is a first born. And even if they don't abort -- girls are less likely to be taken to a doctor when they get sick or get a good meal when food is scarce. Thus the girls' mortality is far greater than the boys'. In some cases, they are literally left to starve and die.

Glenn Fawcett suggests in Indian society the risk and burden of raising a girl is greater, no matter what caste or economic class. There is the dowry problem, but also a general view of seeing girls as less valuable, more of a liability than an asset. It is the boy who is expected to stay home, take care of his parents when they are elderly, bring home a good wife, and run the family trade. Girls, however, leave the house to take care of their husband's family, and if they elope or get pregnant before their marriage is arranged, the whole family's reputation is irreparably ruined.

While traditional customs and values are hard to shift, it is comparatively easy to suggest creative solutions in Asia. Lotus Outreach tries to change perception from the ground up: its programs specifically target girls' education. Every Indian girl who earns her own dowry is tipping the table. Every woman who gets a secondary education and thus a good job is the pride of her family. Every daughter who is able to support her family is a living proof that the girl bias is outdated. It can be done: South Korea, once boasting a girl ratio as bad as China's, has profoundly transformed itself and is heading towards equality now.

Yet, as the Gallup poll shows, the rift goes much deeper, beyond India's dowry customs and China's one-child policy. We just don't value girls as much, whether in Asia or America. Traditional perceptions in Asia might be hard to shift and easy to condemn, but with no dowry system and equal education access in America, why do American parents prefer boys, too?

Do parents feel more confident a son will care for them when they are old and bedridden? Wrong turn. As Nancy Folbre showed in the New York Times, daughters are more likely to be there for them. Are American parents afraid their daughter will get pregnant early? We don't know. Is it because American women are still likely to earn less than their male counterparts? You got a point there, but this is yet another argument for equal wages, not fewer girls. It is a puzzle, and a baffling one. We have more questions than answers. So, let me ask you, Americans: Why do you prefer boys? Or, what's so special about having a baby with a penis?

 

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11:00 AM on 07/31/2011
Oh, boy. I *so* wanted to have girls, both times when I was pregnant. Had their names picked out, and imagined them growing up as my daughters whom I would parent very differently from the way my own mother raised me (us), and protect from so many troubles that came my own way when I was a child. Oh, it would have been so great if had daughters as I dreamed.

Wouldn't you know, I ended up with two sons -- wonderful, mysterious, complicated and now young adult creatures, with whom -- of course -- I've made some of the very same mistakes (?) my mother did with me (us). I'm hoping they can forgive those and be able to appreciate the good (there was some good, after all), just as I have been to do with my own parents.
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FeralForever
I'm watching you...so play nice
05:13 PM on 07/30/2011
So kind of you to ask. When a mother is presented with a male she is thrilled to know this will not be a second-class child. Also, the question of 10 fingers and toes is the only one she usually asks if she is presented with a boy. However, the bias is alive and well with a daughter when mothers ask, will this child be pretty, find a good husband, be raped, come home pregnant, or will she a servile and a second class citizen? Most will opt for the boy. This is the reality and cruel bias in favor of males in the patriarchy which stack the cards against females from birth. It is wholesale misogyny all over this planet. Sad, but true. We must stop undervaluing females and over-valuing males. Period.
02:36 PM on 07/01/2011
Discussion on female infanticide and feticide has remained a mute argument despite substantial picketing against it. There are spoken and unspoken stories of the 50 million girls that have gone ‘missing’ on account of female infanticide and feticide over the past century in India.
http://dharbarkha.blogspot.com/2011/06/female-infanticide-decimating-horror-in.html
07:19 PM on 06/29/2011
My reasons for wanting a boy were nothing like those! I just wanted a "mini" version of my husband not a "mini" me.. I worried about how I would relate to and raise a girl and I was always drawn to boys clothes & things as I thought they were cuter. I had a boys name picked out but not a girls name.. Well turns out I am having a girl and now we couldn't be happier =) But I still want my boy someday !!
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FeralForever
I'm watching you...so play nice
10:29 AM on 07/31/2011
I would put money on the fact that you are one of those 'girls' (as you have on your moniker) who will love your boy but treat your girl with the painful double-standards often foisted onto females. You had a male name picked out but not a female name? That bespeaks of your self-loathing and I sincerely hope your daughter does not learn to adopt your low self-esteem.
GHO
Sooner or later you run out of other peoples money
09:23 AM on 06/28/2011
It's hard to read this article and not think of the Law of Unintended Consequences. Several decades back, the Pro-choice movement devalued the life of the unborn to the point where a fetus is no longer an unborn child, but instead, is a disposable parasite interfering with its mothers' rights. The act of aborting that child has been given no more moral significance than having a boil lanced. Yet we're surprised today to find couples using abortion as a means of selecting the child they find convenient?
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Anna Salinger
04:26 PM on 06/28/2011
"Often, the pregnant women are pressured by their families to abort if they expect a girl -- especially if it is a first born. And even if they don't abort -- girls are less likely to be taken to a doctor when they get sick or get a good meal when food is scarce. Thus the girls' mortality is far greater than the boys'. In some cases, they are literally left to starve and die."

Abortion isn't the problem here. It is men's anti-female bias which leads them to pressure women into abortion female fetuses.

And even if there is no abortions, those girls are left to starve because they aren't wanted.
09:17 AM on 06/28/2011
I am a woman and if I could choose, I would prefer a boy. I must explain my reasons: this world has become a very very dangerous place for women - look at the quantity of women that are kidnapped, raped, killed or just vanished! The numbers are very high; women have lower salaries than men and in general, a company hire more men than women - let's face the fact, this world is too bad with women, this world in general hates women and with the rise of Islam in the planet, imagine your daughter (s) under control of Islam - and this may be happen very soon. As all governments don't control Islam groups in their own countries. A boy grows up and he finds his way on this world, independently, and have more chances of defense-survival if attacked than a woman - unless she practices karate, judo, etc. Henceforth, I would not like to have my daughter to come to this violent world at all. God knows why...
12:14 PM on 06/28/2011
"the rise of Islam in the planet, imagine your daughter(s) under control of Islam ..."
This comment shows that you are not getting true information about Islam from any good source. After all, there must be reasons (which you pointed out in how violent this world has become for a woman) that non-Muslim women across the Western world are converting in droves. Yes, I concede that Islam being practiced in so-called Islamic countries presents a far worse picture. The reason being: illiteracy. Illiteracy breeds more adherence to customs, which are not based on Islamic teachings and closer to paganism. Real Islam, as per Quran and Muhammad's teachings, made both genders equal. If Sons are gifts then Daughters are blessings. There is no dowry required/allowed in Islam. Dowry is a requirement of Hinduism. In Islam, husband gives some money to wife which is calculated based on market price of gold (and gold price keeps going higher). Wife can spend that money as she wishes. Husband is supposed to work hard, find labour, deal with bosses, get stressed, and bring in the dough....
10:26 PM on 06/28/2011
In the newspapers and Al Jazeera, I read about the Muslim Girl's School in Mecca, Saudi Arabia where 14 girl children were allowed to burn to death because the Muslim Orthodoxy Police barred the gates and would not let the girls out of a burning school because they were not wearing the proper head-covering garments. In the rush to escape the burning building, the guirls had no time to get their abayas.

Modern fundamentalist Islam takes the hatred and devaluation of women to an extreme. All patriarchal religions are sick to the core in their hatred of the feminine, but one that allowed girl children to burn to death is despicable beyond measure.
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Anna Salinger
04:27 PM on 06/28/2011
So women are mistreated by men. And your solutions to this is to get rid of women rather than get rid of the mistreatment?
03:16 AM on 06/28/2011
Joannevlavender.......Your post sums it up the best.....
03:10 AM on 06/28/2011
That's 86%. What did the rest of the 14 say? "So we get the PS3 after we finish the survey, right? No? Screw this."
01:23 AM on 06/28/2011
Infanticide in any form is horrific. However, your anti-boy bias is stunning. Schools, social programs, etc., have become so anti-boy, particularly in the USA, that just being a boy seems to somehow be a problem that has to be managed. Clearly something needs to be done about gender-related infanticide in the developing world--on the other hand, in the US, the anti-boy bias, particularly in education, sorely needs to be addressed.
02:22 AM on 06/28/2011
anti-boy? It isn't anti-boy, it's that girl are less likely to join gangs and having been viewed as less than by men for the last 6000 years, we're trying to make up for lost time.
04:27 AM on 06/28/2011
Yes, that is correct, you are trying to make up for lost time. But, you must keep things in perspective. The prevailing thought is that women can do anything a man can do. Sorry, my dear, but that is very wrong. Because, MEN ARE DIFFERENT THAN WOMEN.
07:29 AM on 06/29/2011
Really? So you condone discrimination as long as it's not directed at your gender? How progressive of you.
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Anna Salinger
04:34 PM on 06/28/2011
The USA is a country where men control ally systems of representation, including the movie and music industry, religion etc. and where men have a disproportionately large share of economic, political, and social power. As this survey shows men, i.e. those who are in control in this country, still continue to have an anti-female bias.

Your "what about the menz" is the text book example of backlash. When blacks were granted basic human rights, the white supremacists started their paranoid moans that whites would become an endangered ethnicity and that blacks would take over the county. Male supremacists use the same tactics. They try to silence legitimate complaints about gender inequality with their "what about the menz" BS and their apocalyptic delusions that women will take over and subjugate men the way men did to women.
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OrwellianOne
11:14 AM on 06/30/2011
Men have always, and will always completely dominate.

HAHA
12:46 AM on 06/28/2011
I must have been an oddity--or, perhaps, it was working for the March of Dimes Walk-a-Thon one year decades ago.

One should have a child because you want to love, nurture, and raise a child. Boy or girl should make no difference.

This preference for boys amuses me. Just how do those boys think you get more boys without GIRLS?
12:34 AM on 06/28/2011
I do not believe that there is a girl bias. More girls are going to college than boys. At my son's high school graduation there was a video highlight of the year and not a single boy appeared in it. It was all girls hugging each other. My son used to come home from elementary school and complain that they made him feel guilty for being a boy sometimes. he is grown now but I do remember these things!
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Anna Salinger
04:37 PM on 06/28/2011
So the fact that men favor boys over girls, all the gender violence, the unequal pay, the unequal share of political, economic, and social power etc. leads you to the conclusion that is is actually the poor boyz who are discriminated against in a country run by men?

And your reason to believe this is because girls are better at school?

Let me guess: You are a masculinist.
12:28 AM on 06/28/2011
I wanted boys. My younger sisters are 4, 5 and 8 years younger than me. When my mom went back to work when I was in 4th grade, I got stuck with raising them until my parents got home and all day in the summer. After "raising" 3 girls, I was ready for boys and considered myself lucky to get 2. On the other hand, my best friend's husband told her she could only have girls. The way he figured it, if he was the only male in the family, he'd have all the attention. If he had a son, he'd have to compete with him for his wife's attention. He got his girl first, but then got stuck with 2 boys.
12:43 AM on 06/28/2011
This doesn't sound so much like a gender preference as it sounds like a decided lack of maturity in your best friend's husband.
12:12 AM on 06/28/2011
This is one of those articles I wish I had not read. It's hideous. I know that in some countries baby girls are aborted in favor of trying for a boy, but this is another example of how society is destroying itself. How can anyone think this is okay and do this? I can't begin to imagine aborting a beautiful, healthy baby just because you wanted a different gender? I have two girls and if I got pregnant and had two more - I would love them just the same.
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Anna Salinger
04:39 PM on 06/28/2011
Ther would be no need for abortion girls or letting them strave once they are born if men didn't have this anti-female bias. If you want to place blame, then put it where it belongs.
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dbrockskk
10:26 PM on 06/27/2011
Must be me, I prayed for a girl! (got her!)
12:32 AM on 06/28/2011
Me too! If it hurt too much I was going to stop at one and I really, really, wanted a girl. Was so lucky to have a beautiful daughter (who is now 21). Guess it didn't hurt as much as I feared. Went on to have twins. Prayed for a boy & girl - and got them! I also prayed for two girls if I couldn't have a boy & girl because I could never deal with two boys lol. They are now 16 and I love them to bits. Feel very blessed to have healthy, beautiful children and doubly so to get the genders I wanted.
12:51 AM on 06/30/2011
I haven't had children yet, but my husband and I both want a girl when we do decide it's time, and I have a husband who could be seen as traditionally masculine - military/drill sergeant/practices mixed martial arts/played semi-pro football. He wants a girl, just as much as I do, and he wants her to be strong academically, artistically, and physically. In fact, I think if we had only boys and no girls, he'd be disappointed, but the other way around, he'd be fine with it. I pray for a girl, too, I even know what I want to name her, and I dream about what she will look like and act like.
10:13 PM on 06/27/2011
Men may prefer boys to girls, but once they hold their baby girl in their arms, they are hooked. Father/son bond is sooo different from a father/daughter bond.