When I was a freshman someone told me:
Freshman year everyone is fake. You are just trying to fit in and be everyone's friend. You have this need to please people.
Sophomore year is drama. That's all it is. Everyone has a problem with someone and maybe even a problem with themselves.
Junior year is when you really figure everything out, kind of. You find your group of friends and you get over the drama that bothered you before. Things become confusing with college and you will always be asked about the future and most of the time you won't want to answer because YOU DON'TKNOW, OKAY? You also figure out who your real friends are.
Senior year you don't care. You don't care about what people think, you know who you are. "Senioritis" is actually a real thing but do your school work anyway because when it's over, it's over.
Those words have been stuck in my head ever since.
I am now going to be a senior in high school and every part of what that person said to me is true.
I remember when I was a freshman I had this need to get everyone to like me, to be "popular," because the only high school I had ever been exposed to was Lizzie McGuire's. I needed everyone to like me and I went through a lot try and get them to.
My sophomore year was definitely a problem year. I still had this need to get everyone to like me, but I ruined a lot of friendships while doing it. I go to a very small school, so news travels extremely fast. And, I mean, if something happens in fifth period lunch, the kids in sixth period are asking all about it when we are switching between classes. I kind of had a big mouth which got me into a lot problems that I couldn't talk myself out of.
Junior year was the biggest learning year of high school. Not because of Chemistry, though it was a lot of hair pulling because where is spontaneous combustion going to get me in life and why do I care what Avogadro's number is? (For the record, it is 6.02 x 1023.) I learned a lot about myself and the kids I go to school with.
I think everyone needs to take a second and realize that everyone has feelings and everyone matters. I think we forget that -- that everyone has their own battles and you being a jerk doesn't really help them out. I have been asked a billion times where I want to go to college and what I want to be. It takes every part of me not to scream, "I DON'T KNOW YET STOP ASKING ME THE FUTURE FREAKS ME OUT AND YOU AND EVERY OTHER PERSON THAT EXISTS KEEPS ASKING ME AND MY HEAD IS GOING TO EXPLODE BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW, OKAY?"
But thankfully, I think I figured it out. I stopped caring what everyone else thinks about me, because they do not matter if I don't care about them. I think the most important part of this year was when I found out who my real friends were. They were the kind of friendship that were easy and didn't take effort. You can say what you are thinking and how you are feeling and they were there to listen, and they gave you the most honest advice they could.
I've really grown through high school and if I could, I would slap who I was freshman year. You shouldn't talk about people behind their backs. If you have something to say, say it to their face. Don't be drama queen. Nothing is ever as bad as it seems. Chemistry and Biology won't ruin your life like you think they will, although Anatomy might.
But the most important thing I have learned is that life will go on, no matter what, because time really doesn't stop for anyone. I can not wait to start my senior year and see what it has in store for me. I want to wish everyone in the class of 2014 good luck, because I know you'll need it. (And please don't write that paper the night before it's due.)