05/27/2011 06:07 pm ET | Updated Jul 26, 2011

Gingrich at Tiffany's (Or: Why My Half Mil Revolving Fund Is None of Your Business)

There once was a Georgian peach, Newt
(Listen up y'all, this one's a real beaut)
Bedecked his bride with gems
(Now he haws and he hems)
When pressed on it, he should have stayed mute

Seems Callista (that's Wife Number Three)
Also known to some as Mrs. G
Was bejeweled and adorned
While "excess!!!" ol' Newt scorned
How's this bode for his candidacy?

Line of credit for 500K
Lot of bling for one who's wont to stray
He's been on thin ice
Behooved him to think twice
Perhaps he'd do better to pray

The guy preaches fiscal restraint
But practice it? Clearly he ain't
Was forced to Face the Nation
To his consternation
His rep this just might further taint

His spouse filed two years of reports
Hubby now has no witty retorts
Schieffer called it "bizarre"
With him Newt lost the spar
His chances you think this aborts?

"It's my private life!" he told the host
Through this tete-a-tete he couldn't coast
Says he's "frugal" -- Indeed!
'Tween the lines we can read
(His arrogance gets me the most)

In past he's said all's "on the table"
Yet now he's not willing nor able
To reveal what he bought
It appears he's been caught
What a rather predictable fable!

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