05/16/2009 05:12 am ET | Updated May 25, 2011


Neal Boortz appears to be off his meds. Again.

The mildly psychotic Atlanta radio talker nearly lost it today (so I'm told; I never listen to Boortz' daily Fascist rant) when he fixated on the recently released Dept. of Homeland Security report on the current state of Right-Wing Extremism in the U.S.

According to my correspondent the well-padded Boortz began frothing about federal agents coming for your guns! Wow! (Okay, Neal has never been known for his originality.) Not only that, they're also going to close down your hunting camps, and (gasp!) censor what can be said on right-wing radio and television, seize your laptops if you voted Republican in the last election, and just all sorts of wild-eyed bullshit that Neal has been raving about for years here in the buckle of the Bible Belt. It's made him very rich and very paranoid. But, nonetheless, loved, dearly loved, by most of the crazy white people in Georgia.


The report Neal is peeing himself over (and his listeners if they get too close) says the following:

This product is one of a series of intelligence assessments published by the Extremism and Radicalization Branch to facilitate a greater understanding of the phenomenon of violent radicalization in the United States. The information is provided to federal, state, local, and tribal counterterrorism and law enforcement officials so they may effectively deter, prevent, preempt, or respond to terrorist attacks against the United States. Federal efforts to influence domestic public opinion must be conducted in an overt and transparent manner, clearly identifying United States Government sponsorship.

EEEEEEEEK!!!!! That's some heavy shit, brothers and sisters. An "intelligence assessment." As in getting to know the real threats to this country - and it ain't Muslim bomb-throwers in some desolate mountain country on the other side of the globe. The threat is here; it speaks American English; it's Caucasian and mostly pot-bellied male; it dresses in Nazi-style drag and says "Seig Heil" a lot; some of it infests talk radio and television; it's cheerleaders include Boortz, Glenn Beck, Limbaugh, Hannity, Savage, O'Reilly, and a whole sub-basement full of smelly, lesser right-wing cowards and squealers.

But, I digress. More from The Report. (Drum Roll, please.):

Threats from white supremacist and violent antigovernment groups during 2009 have been largely rhetorical and have not indicated plans to carry out violent acts. Nevertheless, the consequences of a prolonged economic downturn-including real estate foreclosures, unemployment, and an inability to obtain credit-could create a fertile recruiting environment for rightwing extremists and even result in confrontations between such groups and government authorities similar to those in the past.

Rightwing extremists have capitalized on the election of the first African American president, and are focusing their efforts to recruit new members, mobilize existing supporters, and broaden their scope and appeal through propaganda, but they have not yet turned to attack planning.

You can see right away, right? why Boortz and the rest of the pants-peeing, cowards on the political right are all agitated and running around in circles screaming, "Buy guns! Buy guns! Buy guns! Brick up your front windows! Dig deep holes to hide in! Surround your compound with razor wire and machine gun towers!! Hurry! Hurry! The Negro President is coming to get us! Hurry! Hurry! Ma-Maaaaaaaaaaaa . . .! I want my Mama!!!!"

One thing is true in all this sweaty right-wing yelling and screaming: Boortz and his comrades in the neo-Nazi Right know their audience. Oh, yeah. They know how to push their buttons, get them scared, too, convince them that LIBERALS are coming to do bad things to them. And, the right-wing media shit-heads do all this for sport. That's all; for sport. It takes their minds off their own fear of (grrrrrrrr . . .) LIBERALS! They love to see how far they can push their ditto-heads, belittle them, steal their courage, make them look like caged monkeys . . . and then laugh all the way to the bank, all the while wondering when the LIBERALS are gonna leap out of the bushes and give them a red-ass.

I wonder if the ditto-monkeys will ever - ever - come out of the ether and realized how badly they've been mentally and emotionally raped for someone else's fun.

Oh, and, Neal, for god's sake please renew your Abilify prescription. You're making the Atlanta Police Department nervous.

Mike Malloy can be heard daily on his radio show 9pm - 12pm ET. Visit to stream live or find a station near you