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College's Catch-22

Posted: 09/06/11 01:47 PM ET

My parents didn't have the opportunity to go to college and were delighted when I decided to attend UC-Berkeley to study cognitive science. Although I received grants and scholarships, I still had to take out loans to help pay for living costs. I wish that I had thought about work-study, additional scholarships, or a part-time job, but I was only 18 years old. I hadn't a clue what I was doing, and my parents were too busy working to do any diligent research themselves. There was nobody evaluating the wiseness of the decisions my family and I made, and no one making sure I actually understood the borrowing process.

I currently owe around $23,000 not including interest and Parent PLUS loans, which my mother is still generously paying off. She is 60 years old and works 11 to 12 hour days selling flooring, which her employers pay on commission and only if no mistakes are made. She can't retire because she has to help me pay back my loans, and she won't let me pay the PLUS loans myself. It's very frustrating.

Since graduating in 2009, I've worked a number of jobs in an attempt to find my passion as a research assistant in both medical and experimental settings, as a musician, and most recently as a user researcher in the San Francisco technology community. My dream would be to apply for a fellowship like Teach For America and focus on writing and music in my spare time, but I'm reluctant to take any big leaps that require additional investment from my family. I simply can't afford to do anything other than what I am doing now.

I live in the Bay Area, one of the most expensive regions in the country. To make ends meet, my friends and I have come up with some creative ways to budget. I currently live in a warehouse with seven people and one bathroom; my rent is still about $400/month (my friend that sleeps in a windowless closet only pays $200/month). I have a couple of friends that play piano at BART stations so they can pay their rent. Another friend has been sleeping on our couch for a year, struggling to find a decent job. Did I mention we graduated from Berkeley?

Our current education system is frustrating because it is a Catch-22: to make enough money, we need to have an education, but to get that education, we need enough money. If we don't have that money, we have to go into debt. I've been lucky enough to have a number of teachers, family members, and mentors who inspired me over the past 24 years by telling me that I have what it takes to be successful and do great things for society. It seems strange that because I want to contribute to society, I have to put my family into debt. I wish people like me had a better alternative.

 
 
 
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
profideous man
03:00 PM on 10/26/2011
I feel for you. But I don't know how sympathetic I am with your situation. You got into UC-Berkeley, which is recognized as one of the best universities in America. Congratulations. But this is yet another example of Americans living above their means. We need to face two realities. First, college is not for everybody - you can't teach innovation, and a degree will not help some guy on the line at a Boeing plant. If people want to go to school, take a look at your local universities. I graduated from Wichita State University in Kansas because I could not afford to go anywhere else. But I got a good education in liberal arts. I worked part-time, and I busted my ass to get almost everything paid for my senior year in scholarships - from the school, from my department, and from external sources. I graduated with absolutely no student loan from undergrad. I now go to a top-tier law school in my home state, and even with in-state tuition will be $110,000 by the time all is said and done. That is the real tragedy of the higher education financial system in America - there are tons of scholarship opportunities available for undergrads, but almost none for graduate and professional students. While I sympathize, I am hard-pressed to say "poor baby."
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
bill hontos
02:22 PM on 10/19/2011
Really....if you were smart enough to get into Berkeley I can't believe you were not smart enough to understand what a loan was....I went to a much less famous university (UCSD) back in the late 70's - I didn't even consider a loan - my parents didn't have money to send me to school so I worked all summer doing interior painting ( I learned how from a BOOK !) and writing ads advertising my services in a small magazine called the "Pennysaver" now you could use Craigslist (almost every painter in it can book a job daily if needed there is a big demand !!) , during the school year I worked 4 nights a week cleaning up at a restaurant and I would tutor Jr high kids for 4 hours on Sundays . I graduated in 5 1/2 years .
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Jesse Wright
03:10 PM on 09/07/2011
Thanks for sharing your story. I know first-hand there is nothing more tempting than a student loan. You always think that everything is going to work out, we've always been told - go to school and get a job. My parents were about as helpful in the advice area as yours; both high school dropouts without any real understanding of student loans except they are worth it in the end. Not to fault them, they are both really good with money but just understood student loans to be my way out of the working-poor class. Unlike many people below, I don't see your story as a complaining, but rather trying to inform the world and the US of what conditions are really like around the country. The government claims to have affordable education simply based on the fact that student loans are available (well this shouldn't be the way we think - in that case, Ferrari's are available too!!) The problem comes to the separation of the wealthy and the "want to be wealthy" who want the best out of life and in striving for their goals they may forget reality. The real problem is - that there simply isn't enough room for many of us to move up in the world. With rising tuition and a weak job market, lower income households are just going to stop caring about getting a higher education. Bleak outlook...although, with hard work - you too will get through this and so will others.
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Mike Vattuone
05:05 PM on 09/07/2011
I really appreciate this Jesse. You're right, I'm not complaining. I'm simply trying to inform by describing my situation.
03:39 PM on 11/05/2011
I wish people would stop giving you crap. You chose a field in the sciences at an in-state school. You did the right thing. Right now, I'm at a community college, and even if I choose to go here and transfer to my in-state university (with there only being 1 within commuting distance), it's still difficult to afford, since I'm paying on my own. If someone chooses to stay in-state and work a part time job, they should be able to AT LEAST afford that without debt...but it's not possible any more, at least in wealthier states.
12:58 PM on 09/07/2011
"She can't retire because she has to help me pay back my loans, and she won't let me pay the PLUS loans myself. It's very frustrating."

Sorry, I don't buy it. This individual is all grown up. He's confused, lost and putting the responsibility of his own life on his mother's shoulders. And his mother is taking it on. He could make the choice NOT to accept his mother's help.
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Mike Vattuone
01:22 PM on 09/07/2011
I'm not sure what you're trying to buy, but I can assure you that I have tried many times to get her to transfer the loans to me.

You are right though, it is a confusing time. Thanks for reading!
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KenKo
12:20 PM on 09/07/2011
Mike, really sympathetic about your situation. It seems like there are not enough workshops to explain to high school kids all the upsides and downsides on "signing on the dotted line" for loan applications, though I suspect that even those who take them would still sign them as many always think things will work out for the best. As you pointed out, you can't not take out debt to go to school these days. Only consolation notes I could offer are; one, your debt is low compared to many others, and two, although it sounds harsh, do what you can to wipe that debt earlier than later. Interest accumulation will be the killer (been there, done that), and you need to strangle that debt come hell or high water. You are young, and you will get through this if you keep your goals focused. Don't let the critics deter you from your dreams. It's because we have dreams, that we live.
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Mike Vattuone
01:40 PM on 09/07/2011
Thanks so much! It's not a terrible amount of debt, but the fact that I was able to take it out without even having to think of the consequences is what concerns me. It could just be my fault for being ignorant, sure, but at the same time, where was the prevention? Does the lender want to give out loans to people who have no idea what they are getting themselves into? I don't think they should.
04:04 PM on 10/19/2011
How difficult is it to understand you borrowed money and have to pay it back? Sorry...but it simply doesn't fly.
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11:23 AM on 09/07/2011
Mike. I am glad you're learning that the debt you took out is expensive. That would have been a good lesson to learn before finishing school, but sounds like you're making ends meet for now. My advice, work your butt off while you're young and you'll find out what you want to do. Don't play the victim anymore. If SF (as you say the most expensive place in the US to live) is unaffordable, move. You're smart. Figure it out and stop acting like you can't do for yourself. If your mom can work her fingers to the bone at 60, why can't you in your 20's??????? Sheesh!
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Mike Vattuone
11:49 AM on 09/07/2011
Am I saying that I am not working hard? You make it sound like moving is such an easy thing. The whole point is that I would love to move one day, but it would be an expensive ordeal that I currently am unable to pursue. So I will continue to work in the SF Bay Area and make ends meet, until I have gotten to the point where I have enough money that I can move.

And the whole point is that I don't want my mother to work, and I've worked plenty hard in the hopes that soon she won't have to. So please don't use that as an example of how I'm simply playing the victim.
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12:37 PM on 09/07/2011
As to the point of moving when in my early 20's it was easy and inexpensive. All my belongings fit into my 12 year old accord hatchback with room to spare. I only had to worry about gas. If you have too many possessions consider yourself lucky, then get rid of them and move. Obviously simplistic, but I don't see the major expense in moving at your age unless you have too much stuff and no vehicle. But if you have no vehicle, dump your stuff and go right? UPS is pretty cheap if you do have some stuff, a few big boxes are a couple hundred bucks to ship. Anyway, you can do whatever you want, I can complain about you I guess, but my experience is when I stopped complaining about 6 years ago as a 31 year old man I paid off over $30k in debt between me and my wife on credit cards, bought a house and am making additional payments on principal, have 2 kids now, whittled down expenses to the point where my wife stays home with our kids, and we have never been happier. All this while earning a pawltry income in Colorado. You can do anything if you want to man. Trust me, it will impact your social life and other material goals for now, but it can be done.
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laaambchop
Cheerfulness is a sign of wisdom
12:54 PM on 09/07/2011
Moving isn't really a big deal until you have a family.
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Paul Is Right
10:49 AM on 09/07/2011
"I wish that I had thought about work-study, additional scholarships, or a part-time job, but I was only 18 years old."

"It seems strange that because I want to contribute to society, I have to put my family into debt. I wish people like me had a better alternative."

Which is it? Did you have other options or not? Are you claiming youthful ignorance or pleading victimization by the Catch-22?
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Mike Vattuone
11:45 AM on 09/07/2011
How exactly are the two mutually exclusive?

I didn't understand loans. My parents were too busy working to understand loans. Nobody was there to explain why I shouldn't just take all of these loans that were offered to me.

So yes, I was youthfully ignorant, and I've taken responsibility for that. But I would argue that my ignorance was taken advantage of, and that is my primary concern in this article. Thanks for reading!
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Paul Is Right
12:47 PM on 09/07/2011
You wrote that you wish you had a better alternative than debt, but that you didn't think about working because you were young and naive (which acknowledges working as an alternative). You had an alternative, you simply didn't think about it.

You appear to be placing blame on the lender(s) who made attending the college of your choice an option for you. Without them, you would not have been there to begin with. In what way did your student loan lender(s) take advantage of you? They were not the ones who told you which college to attend, which major to select, or what to do when you graduated. They simply loaned you money so you could pursue your dream of attending college (and one of the best in the country at that).

In sum, you were an adult who made decisions while thinking as a child (by your own admission). You were not taken advantage of; you made choices that have lasting effect on your future.
02:55 PM on 09/07/2011
Blaming your parents for your own lack of focus? Yeah, just sit there waiting for daddy to come explain the terms of your car loan to you.
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Mike Newman
08:07 PM on 09/06/2011
sadly, without the large number of people in our generation that have to go into debt to attend college the entire higher education system would crumble. the only way to change things is to tell our stories and fight back. you can start by joining studentloanjustice.org and forgivestudentloandebt.com. we all need to fight back against this corrupt system that has turned us into debt slaves. we shouldn't be punished for trying to improve our lives. it's not our fault we came from middle class families that didn't know the truths about the college swindle. the loan companies expect us to lie down and remain passive. they expect us to not do anything about their predatory practices, but one day they will get the justice they deserve. we can help ignite this process by standing up and making our voices heard.

thanks for sharing your story!
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11:21 AM on 09/07/2011
Sadly, it is your fault for signing documents you don't understand. While forgiving debt would be sweet....for whoever took out too much in loans, it only encourages claiming you were victimized. If college is a swindle, spread the word about that.

I hear your voice. Yes, you're a victim. Unfortunately you're a victim of the mentality that you don't have to take responsibility for your actions.
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Mike Vattuone
11:54 AM on 09/07/2011
No, we are not victims of saying we can't take responsibility for our actions. Rather, we are victims of a system of loans that are incredibly easy to get, regardless of your understanding of what these loans mean once you actually have to pay them back.

I made a mistake, and I wish that I could take back my ignorant decision. However, I didn't, and that's why I'm writing about it, in the hopes that maybe someone else will think twice before they simply accept all of their loans without understanding how much they will have to pay off after they graduate.
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laaambchop
Cheerfulness is a sign of wisdom
12:48 PM on 09/07/2011
Well, there is another side to this: 18 year-olds are being given, yes given, loans...only because Uncle Sam guarantees them in case of default...the banks win, no matter what, but the taxpayer and the debtors don't (in the case of default)...now, you have to ask yourself, how wise is it to give a loan to an individual who has (probably) never worked, and also never had to support oneself? I am not saying one ought not pay back one's obligations...but you have to acknowledge that it was set up with the well being of the banks' in mind, not the students, and not the Feds...oh, and the colleges and university certainly benefited, too...
04:10 PM on 10/19/2011
One day, you will get the justice you deserve as well. Think on that.