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Natasha Burton

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Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie Marriage: They're Engaged, But Is The Pressure Really Off?

Posted: 04/13/2012 4:42 pm

This is it, folks -- the moment we've all been waiting for. This week, Angelina Jolie was spotted in what sources believed to be an engagement ring custom designed by Brad Pitt, and now the couple have confirmed that they will, "finally," as some people are putting it, get married.

I have to say that I was pretty skeptical when the news broke today. Tabloid covers and celebrity gossip websites have been speculating on the couple's will-they-or-won't-they factor since 2005, despite the fact that the pair remained tight-lipped about their relationship until Jolie announced to People that she was pregnant with Pitt's child in January 2006. The coverage of their coupledom has been relentless, from the birth and adoptions of their children, to the suggestion that Jolie and Pitt's ex Jennifer Aniston are engaged in some kind of catfight to see who makes it down the aisle first. Even the mere suggestion of possible nuptials makes headlines, as was the case this January, when Pitt vaguely commented that he "would like to marry" Jolie.

Jolie is, I imagine, far too cool and self-assured to even bat an eye at those tabloid covers or make note of the attention lavished on her relationship with Pitt. But could a mere mortal keep her cool in the face of constant marriage pressure? If I were to see a litany of magazine covers bearing a paparazzi photo of me and my boyfriend accompanied by the blaring headline, ENGAGED -- when we are certainly not -- the pressure would weigh on me. I'm weak-minded when it comes to marriage: I'd start to wonder why we weren't engaged yet. Which would lead me to decide that something must therefore be wrong with me or our relationship. And, before you know it, my boyfriend would come home from work, I'd pick a fight and then he'd really never want to marry me.

Because of my sensitivity to the marriage issue, the idea that a couple's relationship had to "go somewhere" -- as if it were a train or a movie plot -- really irks me, especially as its applied to women. It's as if a relationship must continue to hit milestones in order for it -- and for us -- to be considered legitimate. If you're single, when are you going to find yourself a boyfriend? If you have a boyfriend, well, when is he going to pop the question? Once you're engaged, when are you going to get yourself to the chapel already? (Don't wait too long, lest your fiancé get cold feet). And, once married, the question turns to children, an inquiry that has turned Kate Middleton's midsection into an object of tabloid scrutiny: When are you going to start breeding? (Luckily for Pitt and Jolie, they already have that part covered).

It's this pressure -- both the kind we experience personally when doled out by our families or friends as well as the kind we see thrust onto celebrities' relationships -- that I believe compels women who aren't engaged to create Pinterest boards of their wedding days (full disclosure: I'm one of them), or feel like they've somehow fallen short if their boyfriend hasn't dropped down on one knee after X amount of years. (There's also, of course, just as much pressure on men to "do the right thing" -- you know, stop dragging their feet and put a ring on it already).

And I really have to hand it to Jolie and Pitt for gracefully enduring over six years of speculation over the state of their relationship, as well as creating their family in their own way and on their own time. I just hope they're ready for the barrage of commentary on where, when and how they will tie the knot. Because that's going to be starting right about now.

 
 
 

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This is it, folks -- the moment we've all been waiting for. This week, Angelina Jolie was spotted in what sources believed to be an engagement ring custom designed by Brad Pitt, and now the couple hav...
This is it, folks -- the moment we've all been waiting for. This week, Angelina Jolie was spotted in what sources believed to be an engagement ring custom designed by Brad Pitt, and now the couple hav...
 
 
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
MiMi LLawsonn
Just my opinion****
08:00 PM on 04/15/2012
Money does NOT BUY HAPPINESS.....perhaps she was afraid that BRAD could not make her happy....afterall, she did break up his marriage.......
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
UserNameJane
Does my micro bio make my butt look big
11:17 AM on 04/16/2012
Brad broke up his marriage, He was the one that was married, Jolie was not.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
MiMi LLawsonn
Just my opinion****
08:00 PM on 04/15/2012
This is this generation of young people's idea of doing what is right....shack up with whomever you feel like it....have a baby or two....if it does not work out...then you can take what is yours and leave...no strings attached...don't worry about what anyone thinks...as they know nothing anyway....morals or standards? Setting a good example for the children? What is that?.....we have no morals and standards...and we could care less about setting a good example for the children.....here is hoping that they both get back 10 fold of what they have shown as a way of life for their children....
06:56 PM on 06/03/2012
DITTO!
12:07 PM on 04/15/2012
who cares?
jhowa
i donn't kknow how to do that.
01:49 PM on 04/15/2012
i feel the same way. really,who cares?
09:35 PM on 04/14/2012
I don't think they were pressured into getting married. I think it's something they've always wanted to do but have made other things priorities. I also don't think that after seven years and six kids the marriage will change their relationship much.

Read more about it here:

http://thecelebritycafe.com/feature/2012/04/brad-pitt-and-angelina-jolie-engaged-it-promise-future
11:07 AM on 04/15/2012
hello mintyfreshh
i agreed with you. i do not think they could be pressured into doing anything that they did not want to do. in fact i think that they are really in love and cherish their children. i wish brad and angellina happiness. i did not realize that they have been together for seven years and six kids.i honestly thought that brad and jennifer would have lasted, but hopefully jen will find happiness two. she;s a lovely,kind and funny young woman.sometime we get married two fast ,it good to get to know the person before you jump into i do. good luck and happiness to all.
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Justgo4it
not fishing for trouble, are YOU??
12:41 PM on 04/15/2012
Jen never wanted kids, Brad did, Jen's lose Angies gain. Btw Jen has congratulated them on their Engagement. So she has moved on. Seems lots of others who wallow in their breakup should do it as well since it is 7 years now.
12:34 AM on 04/14/2012
there's no good reason to get married. it IS weak minded to give in to all that social pressure, and as a grown woman not be able to shirk it off. the very fact that society puts that kind of pressure on women should be reason to say no to it out of protest if nothing else, yet women fall in line and do exactly what they're told. is it really rational to need a party to show everyone that you are with someone? does spending thousands on a dress you wear once and a ring mined by impoverished people make you more of a person? if you love someone and want to share your life with them, why not just be with that person without the show? then there's the procreation push. is it rational to need mini mes in a world of 7 billion+? if you love kids, adopt a couple that desperately need care or work with them. people need to be strong critical thinkers and stop bowing to ancient rituals and peer pressure. if grown adults can't stand up to peer pressure and detach from the importance society puts on things that may well not be best for them or the planet, then how can they possibly be adult enough to tell kids anything about self confidence and standing up to peer pressure?
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Justgo4it
not fishing for trouble, are YOU??
12:45 PM on 04/15/2012
get a clue, they are doing it for the kids. and kids are great at applying pressure on parents. so it seems you are neither married nor have children. and those two seem like really great parents. so your comment is blah blah blah to me.
10:28 PM on 04/17/2012
I completely agree. I ended up getting married 3 years ago, basically because I felt like I was "supposed to." It's nice having more financial security, but other than that the whole concept of marriage is overblown.