The crisis in our current health care crisis has finally reached the crisis point. We must now take the issue firmly by the shoulders as one would a willful child, and, in the words of Pliny the Elder, punch its stupid face in. Let us summarize where we stand as...

"A steam boat? That Fulton feller's gonna drown or kill us all!" "An electrical light? That Edison feller's gonna drown or kill us all!" "An 840 page September issue? That Wintour feller's gonna drown or kill us all!" When will the bow-tied vest-wearers of the it's-never-been-done-so-it-can't-be-done crowd ever learn? Time...

Hours of highly focused circular logic uncorrupted by the distractions of research or informed discussion have at last revealed the answer to our present fiscalamity. We need a scapegoat. Someone we can all enjoy taking down, who can be found quickly, and just as quickly dispatched. In the hopes that...

Like most of you, until now I've done little to aid our dystrophic economy. Sure, I've complained and I've cursed; I nod vigorously whenever my opinions are expressed by people whose opinions matter. I've patriotically lost my job and even gone so far as to buy a book on how...

Hoovervilles! Hobo Junctions! Shaky Acres! However you slur it, Americans are once again embracing DIY squalor. Across the country armies of the nouveau impoveriche are huddling around the soothing flicker of oil-drum fires to share the wisdom of their forebums and re-learn the ways of bean and can.
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Of all Bernie Madoff's outrages none surpasses his request to keep $69 million. The betrayal of friends and charities? Well, business is business. The unfathomable scope? You know how it is: once you rip-off your first billion, the next sixty four sort of disappear on their own. But asking for...

What is it with this economy already? Are we in a depression, as many believe, or merely a recession, as many believe? Could it possibly be some third, other thing, like a punishment from angry Cherokee spirits? A tracking error? Is it the fault of so-called "international bankers," as prominent...

This entry marks the first installment of my long awaited series, The Simplificator, offering easily parroted explanations of the technologies that rule our daily lives.

On February 17, 2009, for some reason, all broadcast television programs originating within the U.S. will be sent digitally, replacing the old analog method. For...

Yielding to U.S. threats that he resign immediately or face the possibility of death from natural causes, 81-year-old Communist strongman Fidel Castro has stepped down. Acknowledging that America was fully committed to doing absolutely nothing to prevent the robustly ailing tyrant's life from ending of its own accord, the self-appointed...

With Thanksgiving finally off the books the real holidays can now bear down us with merciless speed, shoving ahead the shockwave of gift-giving induced panic that grows more bowel loosening with each day. Despite the hyper-abundance of choice (greater now than it was when you began reading this) finding a...

The state of Nebraska wants to grow pot, or so congress would have us believe. What they really want to raise is industrial hemp, a plant that shares many, but not all, of its botanical features with marijuana....

Method of conclusively determining whether a nominee for office regards a particular practice as "torture."

Step 1. - Subject nominee to the practice under debate.
Step 2. - Ask if nominee believes he/she is being "tortured."
Step 3. - Note nominee's response.
Step 4. - Repeat Steps...