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Ann Brenoff"S on the Fly

How Handbags Have Marked The Stages Of My Life

Ann Brenoff | Posted 06.26.2015 | Fifty
Ann Brenoff

Lately, I have been carrying a small cross-body bag inside my cavernous tote bag. 'Why two purses?' my stalwart husband asked when he caught me doubling up. 'You're not becoming a bag lady on me, are you?' No, I'm not becoming a bag lady. But I am transitioning.

Why Old People Having Sex Makes Young People Squirm

Ann Brenoff | Posted 06.18.2015 | Fifty
Ann Brenoff

Old people have sex. They have it in many places; they even have it in nursing homes. They have heterosexual sex, same-sex sex, sex with multiple partners, and sex with themselves. But for some reason, the very fact that older people have sex makes younger people uncomfortable.

Why Happy Hours May Soon Replace Early Bird Specials

Ann Brenoff | Posted 06.11.2015 | Fifty
Ann Brenoff

For me, the early-bird specials that I shared weekly on Sundays with my aunts were an edible symbol of what growing old looked like. Sure you would save a few dollars by eating off-hours, but wasn't there something else being lost?

Why We Should Erase The Concept Of A Fixed 'Retirement Age'

Ann Brenoff | Posted 05.28.2015 | Fifty
Ann Brenoff

The old-age dependency ratio we rely on has a big, glaring weakness: It assumes that at age 65 everyone will become an 'old-age dependent' -- meaning retire and leave the workforce. And the reality is, that isn't the case now and certainly won't be true in the future.

10 Tips For New Graduates That I Wish Someone Had Given Me 40 Years Ago

Ann Brenoff | Posted 05.21.2015 | Fifty
Ann Brenoff

My Facebook feed is filled with photos of smiling college graduates. If you want to share some real advice with the graduates in your life, try these tidbits. Here's what nobody told me at my graduation 40 years ago that I wished they had.

10 Things I Want My Kids To Know This Mother's Day

Ann Brenoff | Posted 05.07.2015 | Fifty
Ann Brenoff

Now that I am a Mom -- an older Mom at that -- there are some things I need to tell my kids (now 17 and 14) this Mother's Day.

The Elderly Are Taking Too Many Pills

Ann Brenoff | Posted 06.30.2015 | Fifty
Ann Brenoff

As people rise in years, so rises the likelihood that they will be prescribed a pill for what ails them. It's the end results that are so disturbing.

Dementia And Sex: What Was Really On Trial With Henry Rayhons

Ann Brenoff | Posted 06.23.2015 | Fifty
Ann Brenoff

An Iowa jury on Wednesday found 78-year-old Henry Rayhons not guilty of charges that he sexually abused his wife by having sex with her in a nursing home after the staff told him her Alzheimer's rendered her cognitively unable to give consent.

When Are You Too Old To Be A New Parent?

Ann Brenoff | Posted 06.14.2015 | Fifty
Ann Brenoff

For years, I have stared down anyone who dared suggest that I was too old to parent. My husband and I went into adoption with our eyes wide open. The German woman, though? Yeah, she gives me pause. Never being too old to love a child isn't the same as never being too old to parent one.

7 Lessons From A Whirlwind College Road Trip

Ann Brenoff | Posted 06.09.2015 | Fifty
Ann Brenoff

Spring break of a high schooler's junior year marks the official starting gate of the college application season. Up until this point, your student may have toured a few colleges near home -- and rejected them all based on that fact -- but spring break is when thousands of families hit the road.

The Day I Realized No One Cares About Woodstock Anymore

Ann Brenoff | Posted 06.02.2015 | Fifty
Ann Brenoff

What has happened to Woodstock? Has it been obliterated from our collective memories? The three-day gathering of half a million flower children was a watershed moment for a generation, heck for the country itself. But do younger people even know about it?

I'm Not Trying To 'Age Gracefully' -- So Stop Pressuring Me To

Ann Brenoff | Posted 05.26.2015 | Fifty
Ann Brenoff

I am apparently guilty of one of the last social offenses against humanity: I am aging while female. I plead guilty. I am 65 and a few months ago had that day that everyone eventually has -- the one when you look in the mirror and see a stranger, a stranger who looks much older than you feel.

5 Questions I Wish Younger People Would Stop Asking Me

Ann Brenoff | Posted 05.19.2015 | Fifty
Ann Brenoff

I write about aging, work in an office where I am the oldest woman, and have been married to the same man for what feels like centuries. I understand that at a certain point in life, we morph into mentors to those who are younger. That said, here are five questions I really can't answer.

Is It Still Cheating If Your Spouse No Longer Recognizes You?

Ann Brenoff | Posted 05.12.2015 | Fifty
Ann Brenoff

When your spouse no longer knows who you are, should you still be held to wedding vows of 'til death do us part?' Or does death sometimes come in stages, draining away the person you married drop by precious drop?

Why This 65-Year-Old Is Still Not Ready To Go Gray

Ann Brenoff | Posted 05.05.2015 | Fifty
Ann Brenoff

Every few years, I get a sign that maybe -- just maybe -- it's time to stop coloring my hair. As I wrote 3.5 years ago, I'm a die-hard dyer and have been coloring my hair now for more than 40 years.

Why Egg Freezing Isn't The Answer To Every Problem

Ann Brenoff | Posted 04.28.2015 | Fifty
Ann Brenoff

After spending Valentine's Day alone -- curled up on the couch in the fetal position downing pints of ice cream in between fits of sobbing -- the single 30-something (daughter of a) friend sought my opinion: She is considering freezing her eggs, postponing motherhood until a time down the road when she is married, she said. She asked me, 'Does that make sense?'

5 Things Older Workers Should Do To Keep Their Jobs

Ann Brenoff | Posted 04.21.2015 | Fifty
Ann Brenoff

A friend confided recently that nary a day goes by when she doesn't expect to lose her job. It isn't just that she's in an industry that has shrunk dramatically during the past decade -- she works for a newspaper -- but that she is in her mid-50s.

7 Reasons Being Over 50 Is Absolutely Awesome

Ann Brenoff | Posted 04.14.2015 | Fifty
Ann Brenoff

There are lots of spinmeisters working the aging beat these days. I know this because, well, I'm one of them. We parrot things like '60 is the new 40,' and 'you are only as old as you feel.' While both those statements are in many cases true, there are times they make me cringe.

Thank You Brian Williams For Making Misremembering Legit

Ann Brenoff | Posted 04.08.2015 | Fifty
Ann Brenoff

I would like to thank Brian Williams for helping me understand why I do what I sometimes do. No, I do not exaggerate the stories I report on, and no, I do not outright fabricate things to impress people. The prettier name for what Williams did is 'misremembered.'

Elderly Scams Cost 12 TIMES More Than Previously Thought

Ann Brenoff | Posted 04.07.2015 | Fifty
Ann Brenoff

About four or five times a day, my home phone rings with people who say I've done business with them before (I haven't) or who say that I asked them to call (I didn't). Increasingly, it is angry-voiced men claiming to be from the IRS or some division of the government who say I owe them money (I don't).

Why Turning 65 Is A Process Best Shared With Close Friends

Ann Brenoff | Posted 03.31.2015 | Fifty
Ann Brenoff

I am turning 65, a birthday pinnacle that, without question, sounds astonishing even to me. And to mark the occasion, I staged my own version of Coachella: I called a summit of my Wolf Pack.

5 Things That Are Sexier Than Sex

Ann Brenoff | Posted 03.24.2015 | Fifty
Ann Brenoff

Sex, sex, sex, sex, sex. Sex is all anyone wants to talk about, read about. Is there anything sexier than sex? Actually, maybe there is. How about these five things?

If I Can't Save The World, I Want To At Least Save This Dog

Ann Brenoff | Posted 03.15.2015 | Fifty
Ann Brenoff

I don't know about you, but I'm still reeling from when the world went mad last week. Terrorists attacked journalists and Jews (I am both) in France and the universe spun out of control again. Craziness ruled the day and truthfully, I am blind to any hope for a happy ending.

15 Reasons Why 2015 Already Sucks

Ann Brenoff | Posted 03.10.2015 | Fifty
Ann Brenoff

Here we are just days into the new year and already we have some issues with 2015. Here are 15 reasons why the air is leaving our 2015 balloon.

The Things Boomers Need To Let Go Of In 2015

Ann Brenoff | Posted 02.28.2015 | Fifty
Ann Brenoff

In 2015, let's let go of snap judgements, assuming the worst intentions, and mistaking unkindness for coolness. And while we're at it, maybe we can also quit bringing our phones to restaurants and sleeping with them next to our heads.