I am no longer old, tired and dull. I feel joy, desire, hope, determination. With her, I am learning to be strong and vulnerable at the same time. She has shown me that I can lean on her and feel protected, and also know that I can protect myself.
Part of being a good partner to a trans person is being supportive of their gender expression, however that might take form: physically, emotionally, spiritually. But the truth is that partners go through their own transitions, too.
I am proud to have taken my wife's name for both romantic and political reasons. Personally, this whole gay marriage thing has been a lovely surprise in every way; marriage is about unity. If you aren't willing to merge your names, are you really ready to merge entire lives?
I usually don't have to come out. When I walk into a room, people know I'm a dyke -- unless they mistake me for a dude. Whatev. But recently I had to decide whether to come out. Again. This happened when a reader of my anonymous blog was kind enough to send a post of mine to HuffPost.
The coming-out process can be an overwhelming experience. It is most definitely an emotional rollercoaster as one goes through the self-realization that they are gay all the way to admitting it to the world. But how much of the 'when you come out' affects how you identify within the gay community?