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Pull Up a Chair, Kids

Lester & Charlie | Posted 02.04.2016 | Comedy
Lester & Charlie

And here he is again, declaring that he's two thinks from declaring candidacy and riding to America's rescue. We admit that it's a bit more complicated this time around -- what with Trump or Cruz barreling toward the GOP nom and Bernie bearing down on Hillary hard.

Why Do We Need a Chubby Barbie?

Marta Ibarrondo | Posted 02.01.2016 | Comedy
Marta Ibarrondo

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Penthouse Forum Freshman, Please Reveal Yourself

Greg Schwem | Posted 01.27.2016 | Comedy
Greg Schwem

Confusion briefly reigned in the publishing world last week when reports surfaced that Penthouse magazine, a purveyor of sex and nudity for more than ...

Coming to Netflix: Making a Teenager

Greg Schwem | Posted 01.13.2016 | Comedy
Greg Schwem

I entered the bedroom with Manny, my one-person camera crew, in tow. Startled, my daughter removed her earbuds and dropped her phone. "Dad, what are you doing?" "Filming a new Netflix documentary," I said.

All I Wanted for Christmas Was a Drone

Greg Schwem | Posted 01.06.2016 | Comedy
Greg Schwem

The holiday is officially over and once again I'm left feeling unfulfilled, despite the fact that I consumed an entire Hickory Farms sausage log in one sitting.

Why do we make New Year's resolutions?

Marta Ibarrondo | Posted 01.05.2016 | Comedy
Marta Ibarrondo

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Gift Card Strip Poker and Other Post-Holiday Games

Greg Schwem | Posted 12.23.2015 | Comedy
Greg Schwem

The National Retail Federation recently estimated that 2015 holiday gift card sales will reach nearly $26 billion. By my own calculations, that means the world's 7.3 billion inhabitants will each have about $3.50 to spend on a gift of their choosing beginning December 26.

My Emoji Tolerance Has Reached Its (Insert Red Flame Here) Point

Greg Schwem | Posted 12.16.2015 | Comedy
Greg Schwem

Together, my wife, daughters and I hung the final ornament on the tree then stepped back to admire our handwork, a tradition that also includes reflec...

Why Does Donald Trump Hate Santa?

Marta Ibarrondo | Posted 12.10.2015 | Comedy
Marta Ibarrondo

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Move Along, Porch Pirates; Nothing Worth Stealing Here

Greg Schwem | Posted 12.09.2015 | Comedy
Greg Schwem

While viewing a daily roundup of the country's top trending news topics, I heard a California TV reporter utter what might possibly be the biggest oxy...

Please Set My Hygiene to Auto Renew

Greg Schwem | Posted 12.02.2015 | Comedy
Greg Schwem

There seems to be a growing army of online businesses convinced that I am neglecting my personal hygiene. But with the help of UPS and other package d...

Why is it called Thanksgiving?

Marta Ibarrondo | Posted 11.26.2015 | Comedy
Marta Ibarrondo

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Everyone's Gone Gluten-Free, Now There's Nothing to Eat

Greg Schwem | Posted 11.17.2015 | Comedy
Greg Schwem

The pasta has suddenly turned inky in color and is chocked full of organic black beans; quinoa is ever present at my dinner table and every item in the pantry contains one or more of the following words: earthy, earthiness or earth-some.

Google Creates Smart Replies for Dumb Emails

Greg Schwem | Posted 11.12.2015 | Comedy
Greg Schwem

The helpful folks at Google are at it again, determined to automate every daily task so that mankind will one day wake up and immediately go back to bed upon realizing there is nothing for it to do.

Why Is Fox News Fair and Balanced?

Marta Ibarrondo | Posted 11.09.2015 | Comedy
Marta Ibarrondo

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Why Are British Accents So Sexy?

Marta Ibarrondo | Posted 11.04.2015 | Comedy
Marta Ibarrondo

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Fortune 500 Company Seeks Parrot. Must Be Funny

Greg Schwem | Posted 11.04.2015 | Comedy
Greg Schwem

Whenever I have my children's full attention, meaning they are only performing two simultaneous tasks on their cell phones, I attempt to offer fatherly advice on subjects ranging from drugs to fashion choices to not spending money like a Kardashian

Juice Boxes and Other Incentives for the 2016 Cubs

Greg Schwem | Posted 10.28.2015 | Comedy
Greg Schwem

Faster than you can say "dropped third strike," the Chicago Cubs transformed themselves from World Series contenders to "rebuilders." Or, baseball speak for, "we must get rid of a few guys."

'Gourd' Your Wallet With Your Life This Halloween

Greg Schwem | Posted 10.23.2015 | Comedy
Greg Schwem

During the cool fall months, my house is surrounded on all sides by "pumpkin farms" (a polite term for "cash cows").

Why Didn't Princess Leia Ever Let Her Hair Down?

Marta Ibarrondo | Posted 10.20.2015 | Comedy
Marta Ibarrondo

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Why Do Women Spend So Much On Beauty Creams?

Marta Ibarrondo | Posted 10.17.2015 | Comedy
Marta Ibarrondo

...because they want to undo then resave.

In My Defense, the Cubs are On

Greg Schwem | Posted 10.13.2015 | Comedy
Greg Schwem

From the moment the postseason schedule was announced -- and the Cubs' name FINALLY appeared on it -- the phrase, "The Cubs are on" has reigned supreme as my go to response for, well, everything.

Why Does the NRA Have So Much Power?

Marta Ibarrondo | Posted 10.02.2015 | Comedy
Marta Ibarrondo

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New York Snapshot: "The White Knight of Fordham Road"

Andrew J. Lederer | Posted 09.29.2015 | New York
Andrew J. Lederer

I was running to Sunday yoga class in Isham Park, getting in some exercise ahead of exercise, if you know what I mean. And when I'm motivated to this extent, I'm generally not of a mind to stop until I'm done.

Why Do We Drink Coffee In The Morning?

Marta Ibarrondo | Posted 09.29.2015 | Comedy
Marta Ibarrondo

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