This snapshot of a therapy draws the curtain back on a dance that I see often in my office. Two caring people, inhabiting an unsatisfying relationship, and not sure how they got there. Discovering these tensions and bringing them into the open often helps break through the lukewarm temperature in these relationships.
We sat on the judo mats in a small studio in downtown San Francisco surrounded by 20 other strangers in yoga clothes. Over the last few months, my husband and I had been exploring different ways of connecting physically and this class in Shibari, an ancient Japanese form of rope bondage, seemed full of possibilities.
When I decided to confront what I had perceived as "low libido," I realized that if I could masturbate, then I clearly had the capacity to turn myself on. And with that realization, I began to wonder if getting over my embarrassment about masturbation might be key to unlocking the sexual tiger within.