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Couples Therapy

Considering Couples Counseling? Here Are Some Things to Know First

Dr. Nikki Martinez, Psy.D., LCPC | Posted 10.07.2015 | Divorce
Dr. Nikki Martinez, Psy.D., LCPC

There are a number of things you should consider before entering couples therapy. Are both members of the couple committed to this process? Too often one partner is pulling the other in by their ear, and this does not set great groundwork to start.

Matt Damon And Jimmy Kimmel Reveal The Reason For Their 'Feud'

The Huffington Post | Bill Bradley | Posted 09.29.2015 | Comedy

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Letting Go of the Quest for the Big O

Pam Costa | Posted 09.28.2015 | Women
Pam Costa

Maybe it was because I really didn't want to go to the party we were invited to. Maybe it was because we recently took a class encouraging us to explore each other's bodies with curiosity. Whatever the reason, something very different happened that night when we began to have sex.

How Meditation Can Improve Your Marriage

Jennie Lee | Posted 09.22.2015 | Weddings
Jennie Lee

Modern marriages face a lot of stress -- too little time and money, too much technology and temptation. In order to keep your love alive, it is es...

The Day I Trusted My Husband to Tie Me Up

Pam Costa | Posted 09.21.2015 | Women
Pam Costa

We sat on the judo mats in a small studio in downtown San Francisco surrounded by 20 other strangers in yoga clothes. Over the last few months, my husband and I had been exploring different ways of connecting physically and this class in Shibari, an ancient Japanese form of rope bondage, seemed full of possibilities.

Love and Sex in the Desert

Pam Costa | Posted 09.08.2015 | Women
Pam Costa

As we were driving to Burning Man at the end of last summer, I came across a listing for a class called "Intimate Breathwork & Eyegazing". The workshop promised to help couples connect in a very deep way and I thought "I want to connect in a deep way with my husband... let's do this."

The #1 Relationship Problem, According To Therapists

SELF | Posted 09.03.2015 | Divorce

Whether you're a year into matrimonial bliss or celebrating a decade of wedlock, you'll benefit big-time from this romance wisdom. In fact, you don't even have to be hitched to learn a thing or two about love.

Life After Ashley Madison

Tammy Nelson, Ph.D. | Posted 09.11.2015 | Divorce
Tammy Nelson, Ph.D.

It is more common than you think for people to join dating and cheating websites only to look around. Sometimes, people look around or even chat with someone by email but never, in fact, make a date.

4 Steps to Transform Your Relationships

Scott Gornto | Posted 08.18.2015 | Healthy Living
Scott Gornto

Here are the four steps I encourage my clients to try when they find themselves interacting more with the people in their heads than with the people directly in front of them.

5 Things You Should Never Do During an Argument and What To Do Instead

Andrea Cairella | Posted 08.18.2015 | Women
Andrea Cairella

One of the main internal struggles that many people face in their relationship at times is the inability to love and understand their partner when they are dealing with their own intense emotions, racing thoughts or even the physical discomfort when their own needs are not being met.

'Til Death (or Feedback) Do Us Part

Pam Costa | Posted 08.17.2015 | Women
Pam Costa

Things were going pretty well for my husband and me in our first few months of seeing a sex therapist. I let go of some not-so-helpful beliefs about sex and took ownership over my sexuality.

From Here to [Fantasy]

Pam Costa | Posted 08.04.2015 | Women
Pam Costa

What if instead of being worried about what could go wrong with the conversation, or whether my partner would be interested in doing any of the things that appeal to me, what if I could just give myself permission to think deeply about what I really wanted, and then actually say it out loud?

Why People Choose to Cheat Even When It Might Destroy Their Relationship

Dr. Danielle Harel and Celeste Hirschman M.A. | Posted 07.31.2015 | Women
Dr. Danielle Harel and Celeste Hirschman M.A.

While it is easy to blame the people who have affairs as the one who has betrayed the relationship, in our sex therapy and relationship coaching practice, we have found that people don't cheat because they are bad people. But, they do cheat and they cheat for many reasons.

8 Ways to Be Your Therapist's Favorite Patient

Laura Lifshitz | Posted 07.28.2015 | Comedy
Laura Lifshitz

So you're in therapy and secretly or not-so secretly, you have taken your therapist on as a second mom or dad.

Designing With the Cro-Magnon Male

Debbe Daley | Posted 07.23.2015 | HuffPost Home
Debbe Daley

As an early description of the male species, Cro-Magnons had a strong and hardy robust build. The body was generally heavy, strong and muscular. Somehow through the changes of time, powerful thinking of the Cro-Magnon male hasn't progressed when it comes to changes in their home.

Masturbation Is Wrong. Wait. What?

Pam Costa | Posted 07.21.2015 | Women
Pam Costa

When I decided to confront what I had perceived as "low libido," I realized that if I could masturbate, then I clearly had the capacity to turn myself on. And with that realization, I began to wonder if getting over my embarrassment about masturbation might be key to unlocking the sexual tiger within.

4 Things to Get Right to Keep Your Marriage From Going Wrong

Phoebe Fox | Posted 07.13.2015 | Weddings
Phoebe Fox

If weddings are the splash and fizz of opening night on Broadway, marriage is the slog of the dozens, hundreds, thousands of performances that follow. How are couples supposed to maintain the best parts of the early days of their relationship amid the slings and arrows of day-to-day life?

3 Myths About Low Libido

Pam Costa | Posted 07.06.2015 | Healthy Living
Pam Costa

A year ago, my partner and I made the decision to start seeing a sex and relationship coach. Through our journey, I've debunked a few myths about l...

3 Approaches to Solving Problems

Dr. Natasha Josefowitz | Posted 06.18.2015 | Women
Dr. Natasha Josefowitz

When faced with a conflict with someone else, people often do not know how to proceed. Having a method to deal with problems can be helpful.

Play Like a Kid

Pam Costa | Posted 06.09.2015 | Women
Pam Costa

It may seem strange that writing about playing like a kid is part of a series of blogs about sex, but let's face it, sex is just another form of play. Sure, it's adult play, but if you've forgotten how to play like a kid, my guess is that you're not maximizing the potential for enjoyment in your sex life. At least I certainly wasn't.

What a Strawberry Taught Me About Sex

Pam Costa | Posted 05.26.2015 | Women
Pam Costa

So how can a strawberry teach me to be present? In the past, I relied heavily on touch to keep me immersed in a sexual encounter. But the reality is that I have four other awesome senses that can help keep me present and connected with my partner

Give Me a Kiss to Build a Dream On

Pam Costa | Posted 05.19.2015 | Women
Pam Costa

We decided to conduct an experiment where he would plant a very bold Hollywood-style kiss on me when he arrived home for dinner. This dramatic entrance kick-started the trajectory and was silly enough to throw me off my typical rejection response.

Why Too Much Sex Is Like Too Much Ice Cream

Pam Costa | Posted 05.12.2015 | Women
Pam Costa

My husband's desire was higher than mine, so he initiated sex more frequently than I would otherwise crave it. Over the course of time I rarely had the opportunity to spontaneously feel and connect with my desire of my own accord. This was a very painful state.

Changing the Playlist in My Head

Pam Costa | Posted 05.07.2015 | Women
Pam Costa

A year later, I have added a bunch of new mantras to my playlist. The voices in my head are still funny and sarcastic, but I love them the most when they channel their sassy and sexy sides and whisper things like "Go ahead, you have time for a little unexpected pleasure right now."

When Picture Perfect Isn't Picture Perfect

Pam Costa | Posted 06.30.2015 | Women
Pam Costa

It's an interesting experience, this being the partner with lower desire in a long-term relationship. In my case, the way this played out over two decades is that I fell into a routine of only having sex with my husband when he initiated.