I had given up on love. That's a cliche and sad thing to say, but I mean it in the least sad (and most cliche) way possible. Rather than end-of-my-rope heartbreak, it simply felt like peaceful acceptance.
I truly think that the first time you have sex after marriage is a monumental experience. It can be traumatizing, scary, sad, or strange, but it can also be exciting, fun, heart-stoppingly great, or over-the-top, out of the ballpark amazing.
One benefit of dating after 40 is that by this age, most of us have had a variety of experiences in at least one serious relationship. This gives us the opportunity to reflect on our patterns. We can think about the people we have chosen and question the traits we are looking for.