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Fear of Marriage

A Watertight Marriage

Sheryl Paul | Posted 08.06.2013 | Weddings
Sheryl Paul

There are no rules or paradigms other than the ones that the two of you create and that work for your marriage. But if you're worried about following temptation, I would suggest creating a watertight marriage, which means not putting yourself in tempting situations.

Engagement Anxiety: When Friendships Fall Apart

Sheryl Paul | Posted 07.07.2013 | Weddings
Sheryl Paul

Weddings, like all transitions, are a weeding out process. At these breaking and renewal points where we're asked to shed what no longer serves us so that we can make room for the new identity and stage of life, we're given the opportunity to see ourselves and everyone we're close to under a microscopic lens.

The 5 Biggest Fears Couples Have Before Marriage

Sheryl Paul | Posted 05.27.2013 | Weddings
Sheryl Paul

If you take a look at the list of the top five marriage fears you'll see that they actually simmer down to one fear: the fear of loss.

The Scariest Thought You'll Have Before Marriage

Sheryl Paul | Posted 02.02.2013 | Weddings
Sheryl Paul

At the very core of it is the fear of loss, the fear that just when you open your heart to loving this person completely, something tragic will occur that will take him away.

The Thought You NEVER Want To Have Before Your Wedding

Sheryl Paul | Posted 01.12.2013 | Weddings
Sheryl Paul

I asked if the sadness was past or present and he said "present." Then I asked, "Are there any thoughts that are creating this sadness?" To which he responded, "Just the same one; that I'm in not in love with my bride."

The Big Pre-Marriage Question You Shouldn't Be Scared Of

Sheryl Paul | Posted 01.23.2014 | Weddings
Sheryl Paul

The "Am I gay?" question points to two of the most challenging concepts for the anxious mind to accept, especially when you're on the verge of marriage: that love is a choice and that there are no guarantees or certainties regarding the outcome of this choice.

5 Common Misconceptions That Are Ruining Your Relationship

Sheryl Paul | Posted 12.15.2012 | Weddings
Sheryl Paul

If love isn't only a feeling, what is it? Once the honeymoon wears off, love is primarily a verb, and to love someone is an active experience.

Don't Want To Be A Nervous Wreck On Your Wedding Day? Read This

Sheryl Paul | Posted 11.20.2012 | Weddings
Sheryl Paul

I can tell you with a fair amount of certainty what it takes to be a blissful bride. But first I'm going to tell you what most women do that nearly ensures that they'll be a wreck at their wedding.

How To Know If You're 'Settling' For Your Mate

Sheryl Paul | Posted 10.21.2012 | Weddings
Sheryl Paul

Because we're poorly educated about transitions in our culture, we mistake the fear for doubt and thus begins a scary domino effect of believing that we're in the wrong relationship. The message is: If you're doubting, you must be settling.

3 Ways To Overcome Cold Feet

Sheryl Paul | Posted 09.16.2012 | Weddings
Sheryl Paul

Stay the course, feel your difficult feelings, challenge the false thoughts, and you, too, will land on the sandy shores with your sweet beloved by your side.

Why Your Runaway Bride Instinct Is Wrong

Sheryl Paul | Posted 09.10.2012 | Weddings
Sheryl Paul

I know you're scared. I know that everything inside of you is telling you to run, that you're with the wrong guy, that you don't love him enough or in the right way or as much as you loved some other guy.

The Truth Behind The Biggest Taboo For Couples

Sheryl Paul | Posted 09.06.2012 | Weddings
Sheryl Paul

Here's a secret the mainstream media doesn't tell you: nearly every couple that has been together more than a couple of years struggles with sex at some point in their relationship.

I'll Be Happy When...

Sheryl Paul | Posted 08.04.2012 | Healthy Living
Sheryl Paul

Life is uncertainty. Life is change. There are islands of calm and certainty scattered throughout the ocean, but for the anxious mind the challenge is to learn how to find serenity even during the storm.

What Nobody Tells You About Love

Sheryl Paul | Posted 07.05.2012 | Weddings
Sheryl Paul

Love is action. Love is tolerance. Love is learning your partner's love language and then expressing love in a way that he can receive. Love is giving. Love is receiving.

The Battle Between Love and Fear

Sheryl Paul | Posted 06.18.2012 | Weddings
Sheryl Paul

My biggest fear is that I will have doubts the day of the wedding and be scared to walk down the aisle. How can I learn to trust that this is the last phase of the process and not think that this is a sign that I shouldn't marry?

Why You're Still Thinking About Sex With Your Ex

Sheryl Paul | Posted 04.17.2012 | Weddings
Sheryl Paul

From the beginning, her heart and mind and body were still attached (addicted to) the jerk. Equating sex with love, she was completely convinced that she would never feel in love with her husband.

The Subconscious Thing That Might Be Hurting Your Relationship

Sheryl Paul | Posted 04.15.2012 | Weddings
Sheryl Paul

People find me because in the throes of anxiety. They're taken down by a series of questions that cause them to fear whether or not they're in the "right" relationship or if they're making a "mistake."

Why I Don't Believe In Romantic Love

Sheryl Paul | Posted 04.02.2012 | Weddings
Sheryl Paul

There's nothing like the hot-button days of Valentine's Day and proposals to simmer the myth of romantic love that permeates Western culture to the surface.

Are You 'Anxiously Engaged'? Here's How To Deal

Sheryl Paul | Posted 03.03.2012 | Weddings
Sheryl Paul

What's happening here? The mainstream model of relationships disseminates the message that "doubt means don't" and nowhere is this phrase more prominent than during an engagement.

How Your Need For Love Can Ruin Your Marriage

Sheryl Paul | Posted 03.30.2012 | Weddings
Sheryl Paul

We may have waged a war on drugs but we havent even begun to dismantle the rampant addiction to love that seeps into every crack of mainstream culture.

Why Do So Many Spouses Cheat In The First Year of Marriage?

Sheryl Paul | Posted 03.07.2012 | Weddings
Sheryl Paul

We're all aware of the sobering statistics that tell us that 50% of marriages end in divorce. We know that the modern marriage is vulnerable to a myriad of obstacles that couples must learn to navigate if their partnership is to succeed.

The #1 Thing That Can Sabotage Your Engagement

Sheryl Paul | Posted 02.07.2012 | Weddings
Sheryl Paul

Until I learned how to challenge fear's arguments, I was a helpless pawn under its rule, a victim in a dark forest. It was, in short, misery.

Top 10 WORST Reasons To Break Off Your Engagement

Sheryl Paul | Posted 02.05.2012 | Weddings
Sheryl Paul

Fear's entire mission in life is to keep you safe from the risk of loving. It sees love as a dangerous cesspool where the invisible sea creatures lurk beneath the dark surface, waiting to snatch you into their murky waters.

You're Engaged. So Why Are You Obsessed With Your Ex?

Sheryl Paul | Posted 01.21.2012 | Weddings
Sheryl Paul

My clients are always surprised, then relieved, to learn that thinking about an ex is a normal part of being engaged.

The Growing Movement Against Marriage

The Guardian | Hannah Betts | Posted 11.17.2011 | Healthy Living

Lately it seems that the movement against marriage--Oprah, Susan Sarandon, Maria Bello, and Angelina Jolie are proud members-- is gaining momentum. He...