Just as you would offer individualized instruction and run though extra practice problems with a child who lagged behind in math, commit to spending extra time offering a socially-awkward child extra practice with friendship-building skills.
Pinterest. Rustic charm. $200 bridesmaid dresses. We're at that time in our lives where pretty much all of our friends are getting hitched, and for those of us that aren't (at least not right now), it can be pretty exhausting.
The ghosts of my friendships past still haunt me to varying degrees. The losses all hurt in some way or another, but the most hurtful time I've lost friends was after I became a mother.
What I've been learning is that it's important to press the "pause" button more often when something good happens and to leave it pressed down for extended periods of time.
Regardless of all the responsibilities you have, with children, spouses and partners, jobs and general life chores, you can make time for friends -- as long as you are a bit creative.
When you feel like all that's being accomplished is one person trying to yell louder than the other, walk away -- hang up the phone -- and sign off Gchat for a few minutes.
They know when you are faking it. Not that adults can't figure out when you're faking it. But since adults do a fair amount of faking it themselves, they let it pass. Kids don't.
Great friends are hard to find and important to keep. You know this from experience. But it may not be as clear for your teen
Abandon the cultural myth that all female friendships must be bitchy, toxic, or competitive. This myth is like heels and purses -- pretty but designed to SLOW women down.
I don't want her blue eyes the way her husband must want them before they closed each night. I don't want her body, and not just because it's gone. It was never mine to covet in the first place, just like her life.
Knowing myself better -- which of course comes with age -- has helped me know what I value most from friends better.
Get truthful about what it is that you want, set a plan for how you are going to obtain it and know that it will happen. And don't be too surprised when the universe steps in to give your desire the bit of serendipity that it deserves.
"If your 'friend' expresses interest in another friend of yours, you wouldn't hesitate to introduce them," explains Coleman. "But if you feel saddened or threatened by their interest in your other friend, then you're simply NOT 'just friends.'
Making new friends then: Oh my god! I am totally in that same class! You are coolest, let's hang out. Now: OK. So I see from the stains on your pants that only go from the knee down that you have some type of toddler living in your home. Me too. Wanna come over?
Playing the diplomat isn't always possible, especially if a frenemy clearly crosses a workplace line. Feelings of tension can also hinder productivity for both parties, so it can be helpful to clear the air.
My childhood friends are my partners in crime, my trusted advisers and an eternal source of laughter in my life.